First Ayahuasca Experience

[Swim15]

Ill start this by saying that Im well experienced in psychedelics, use, effects, medical literature, etc.

That said, I did my first ayahuasca trip this past weekend with 4g Syrian rue and 7g Acacia Confusa root bark.

Overall the experience was fine and fairly intense even given that Ive used some high doses of LSD before.

Im a pretty cut and dry/black and white person about most of this stuff and dont look too far into things most of the time but I definitely got an overriding bad sense/vibes during the experience, specifically the peak. My headspace was good the entire time but I got an extremely strong feeling that this stuff just isnt what its made to be....evil isnt the right word exactly but definitely felt like something was trying to invade my headspace most of the time and not in a good way. It gave me a very strong sense of self centeredness and a drive for self pleasure in general whereas I love LSD because it has a less self-centered focus due to the ego death that it causes.

Ive had bad trips before but they were always trips that made me deal with something I didnt want to deal with (the gap between what is and what should be basically) but the ayahuasca wasnt like that at all. This was more of a focus on me, what pleases me, what I love, etc. very little connectedness, empathy, or compassion towards others that Ive experienced to some extend on all other psychedelics.


Anyone experience anything similar?

Going to give it one more go at some point soon at a higher dose but otherwise I dont think Ill be touching the stuff again.

 

[trogere]

I wonder at which point aya might be different if done alone or with an experienced shaman.

I don't know, but there is so much said about icaros and rituals, there might be a part of truth to that.

 

[Xorkoth]

That's odd, generally LSD for me inflates the ego moreso than most psychedelics, whereas tryptamines produce ego death/dissolution most acutely and reliably.

 

[trogere]

That's odd, generally LSD for me inflates the ego moreso than most psychedelics, whereas tryptamines produce ego death/dissolution most acutely and reliably.

LSD can crush the ego too.

Personnally, I have a preference for fast-acting and sedating substances when it comes to ego death. It's much harder to resist. On a long-acting stimulating psychedelic, the stimulation gives energy to resist the ego dissolution, and it gets quickly uncomfortable to being overstimuled during the process.

It's the difference between lying down on the floor saying incoherent stuff and starting to run outside naked.

 

[PsychaStevic]

I noticed the exact same thing myself. Like yourself, I dont look into things far as well, I take psyches for my personal development/joy, but shy away from the "hippie dippie" side of it (no offense, just the name I gave it). You know what I mean, the ones that are so tied down to vibrations and chakras and whatnot that it becomes the whole central focus of their trip. Aside from that little rant, I've taken aya twice now, and both times I noticed deep down, that hippie dippie side reveal itself. Rather than sitting back and allowing everything to just flow, I really noticed what I called an "internal struggle" in my head. Alot of my unhappiness with my own life was brought to light, from relationships to work to home. It was unique to say the least, definitely the most physically taxing psyche I've ingested.