Existential anxiety and feelings of unreality and meaninglessness after shrooms

[badamsterdam]

Hey,

I did mushrooms 10 weeks ago, and now am struggling to find meaning in life. I am convinced that life is not really real (it´s all just a dream.. or solipsistic), and my new perspective of death is that it will be an "awakening", and life is just so meaningless.

I´ve always had a lot of interest in existentialism, but now I just want to connect with reality again, having existential THOUGHTS, not superstitions.

I wonder if time is gonna bring me back down to reality and appreciation of my human life, eventually if there is any practices I can do, or literature to read, that might help me to get a renewed meaning in life, love for life and calm spirit.

Things I´ve already thought of:

Getting a pet
Moving back to my hometown where all my childhood friends and family are
Facing my demons by reading more Sartre, Kierkegaard ext
Asking my girlfriend to marry me, eventually debating having a child
I am currently studying creative writing, but maybe I should change fields and start solitary work, finding happiness in helping others
Connecting out of real world and into a MMO like World of Warcraft, Guild Wars 2 ext

Do you have any thoughts, advice or personal experiences in what may help finding purpose and happiness in life? I am feeling really alone, meaningless and stranded right now. Thoughts of how nice death would be, and so on.

Thank you,
Badamsterdam

 

[DeathDomokun]

Life itself is meaningless. It's up to you to create meaning.
Life is also real, but let's say for a second that it isn't, let's say life is a dream. What difference does this make? How does this affect anything?
You're free to believe what you will, but please understand that from todays understanding death entails a loss of consciousness, and thus you as a conscious being no longer exists.
I know all too well the lack of correlation/disjointedness between thoughts and feelings regarding Nihilism/Existentialism.
The thing is, none of these thoughts interfere with your ability to appreciate life.
No amount of words, irrespective of the author, is going to inherently give your life meaning.
If your girlfriend can't give you meaning/love, what makes you think a pet will?
A change of scenery can be helpful, but I really doubt seeing childhood friends will do much for you. Don't let that stop you, I mean if you're already planning to be in the same city as them you may as well meet up, but them being there would not be a big enough incentive for me to move.
I don't see how reading existentialist literature will free you of existentialism?
Why would you take it upon yourself to impose these issues of life unto another being? Do you have no sympathy for your unborn child?
Solitary means alone, so maybe you mean the opposite? It doesn't have to be your job/career to help people, you know.
If you think an online computer game is gonna fix your problem as opposed to just distract you from your problem, then sign right up. Hell, maybe you're content with distraction. I mean, what else is there?

You want some advice? Go make love to your woman. I don't mean fuck her, either. Hug her, and kiss her, and be intimate with her.

Here, have some music!

 

[malakaix]

^ Great post!

After a while this too shall pass and be of little concern to you because you'll see that life really just IS, irrespective of how you view it..

You can choose to wallow in existential despair or choose to simply live knowing that its upto you to create meaning.

It may take a while to realize this, but when you do you'll probably laugh having ever put yourself through it..

 

[Jerry Atrick]

I say stay away from the shrooms for a little while.