Nauzeenate
Bluelighter
17 Dramamine -- Experienced -- Meeting the shadows once again
If you've ever tried Dramamine(I'm not sure how many have I just know it's heavily used where I come from)then this story should sound pretty familiar...Dramamine is the one drug that I've experienced,and I've experienced many,that consistently have the exact same results...The most intense feelings of deja vu and hallucinations that baffle the hell out of you are there every time....But I'll get to that later...On to the story...
This one began a few days ago over my friend S's house...That was the place where things usually "went down" and this day was no different...My friend R had just purchased an ounce and had hoped to pick up acid at the same time...The acid never showed and we got to talking about how we haven't fried in the longest time...And everytime we talk about frying,Dramamine always pops up...Our group had extensively used Dramamine as something to do when we couldn't find anything else,because we always remember how bad it fucked us up before...Well,out of nowhere,my friend M jumps up remembers he had bought a 36 pack of Dram not too long ago,and totally forgotten about them...A bad feeling in my stomach was brewing....
He comes back brandishing the largest ammount of Dramamine I've ever seen and the queezy feeling of ingesting those bastards lurks out...I convince myself----NO...NO MATTER WHAT THEY SAY...NO!...And I tried to stick to that...But the compassion for my friends R,who has been hounded the past year by his mother,and thrown from rehab to rehab...Dramamine could be detected on his drug tests from AfterCare,and he for some reason just loves to see people fucked up so he can have fun with them-living vicariously through them...When M decides to do it as long as he can have a bud to smoke later on,R began giving the same offer to everyone around...All said no harshly,as I should of done...
But I hadn't fried in a lonnnnnng time...We had been hoping for acid for such a long time,and it had once again failed...This really disappointed me and put me in a-I NEED HALLUCINOGENS-mode...I battled for a minuted on the reprocussions,and the mindfuck that could ensue,and then open my hand for R to shovel them into...I grab a Mountain Dew and toss the pills back,making sure not to taste it at any cost...Tasting the pills can give you the worst case of nausea ever with dramamine...You just taste it forever and everytime you wanna be sick...
After that was done I knew it was over...Any remains of valid thought I wanted for this day were over...I was entering another world tonight...
Bowls were passed around but I refused them...Smoking before Dram always makes me extremely paranoid about what I see...I just sat there and watched it go round,glaring at the sun which was almost down,and waited for the effects...They kick in so subtley you hardly notice it...A weird light flash above you,that you swear is lighting,but are told is not...A word or a sentence sounding kind of distant to you...Like someone was whispering...If your sitting,the first time you stand up is the way you know...You stand up in what seems like forever,and it feels like you've left your head behind where you were sitting...When you walk,it's almost impossible to walk a straight line,because everything look likes an obstacle that either may or may not be there...If you've done it before you usually stop and kick whatever it is,and if you feel a resistance then it's real...If your foot sails through the object and it disappears right before your eyes,then obviously you know its fake...
When I finally stood up to get a better look at the sky and trace whether or not I was seeing lighting in the skies,it hit me like a brick to the head...All of a sudden all around you are flashes of light,that in the onset almost never stop until you start walking...You constantly look over to see them,and their gone,even though you know you can't catch it...Your eyes are just drawn to it...In the night,shadows are the most intense things possible under the influence of dram...They get up and dance and move around all sorts of crazy shit that you are always drawn to look at...with the flashes of light and the shadows jumping out at you,it's pretty had to walk...Not to forget the aforementioned "obstacles"...After awhile I got used to it...But I felt the need to get up and walk around some and sit back down with the intent of doing something,but forgetting by the time I got to where I thought I should have been going...If nobody else is on the shit,you look like the dumbest person in existence...But it's excusable...
Everyone but S and R were playing hacky sack over by a streetlight across the street,and it looked like a bunch people just dancing weirdly in the streets...I had to remind myself a million times that it was my friends over there...M who had also dropped,was playing with them,somehow someway...I could never handle hacky sack on dram no fuckin way...I'd go to hit it and find out nobody had hacked to me...
Around 9 oclock I was ready to go...It had been a solid hour of madness,and I needed to retreat home to regroup...R came as they were leaving with M to play Pool,and gave me my piece,and I got a ride home right after with another friend...I prayed and prayed my mom wouldn't be up and of course as soon as I walk in the door there she was,glaring at me objectionally...I walked by trepidaciously and grabbed a soda from the kitchen...By the time I came out my mom was gone...I asked my step dad where she had gone,and he told me she was in her rooming sleeping...
Oh god,she's not even fucking there...
I rolled my eyes as if to say-"oh silly me"-then attempted to high tail it to my room...That was a narrow escape,and the fact that my mom wasn't there scared the shit out of me...I stumbled toward my cd player and put on a live tool playlist I had made,and crashed hard onto my bed...What the fuck had I done?...Every time I do it I wonder why I just decided to put myself through the complete confusion a Dram fry...It always baffles me...Then I forget about it start talking to people who aren't there...
I looked at the cigarette in my hand and brought up to my face to take a drag...When I got absolutely nothing I looked at my hand and realized the cigarette was not real at all...This happens all the time to almost every person I know that smokes and has taken the pills...Everytime you try,because you never know if you did actually light a cigarette or not...That takes forever too because sometimes there is no cigarette...It's a neverending cycle of mindfucking...This happened all throughout the night...
I looked up at my chair which now inhabited S but he was turned away from me...I look over to my left and see someone I hadn't seen at all that day,Q,sitting on my couch rubbing his goatee like always...I turn back to S and he's gone...I look at Q and say something...He replies with something I can't hear,and I turn back to S..He's there now,and I ask him how he was gonna get home...He turns and says "I don't know" real worriesome,and I look over at Q to ask him for a ride...He of course is now absent too...I look back at S and he's gone too...By this time I was ready to smoke a bowl...
It was about 10:30 when I tried searching for the bowl...I grabbed it and set it down to grab the weed in my wallet...I can't find it and look down and the bowl is gone...I hadn't actually tooken it out...I take it out and rub it to make sure it's really there,then set it down again...I reach for my wallet and now I can't find it...Check my back pocket and it's not there...Dammit...I look all around my room,find it underneath a blanket somehow,and then take it out to put in the bowl...I go to pack it and forget that I don't have bowl...I grab the bowl,sit down,and lose the weed...This cycle goes on and on until I finally get everything situated and smoke it....THIS IS HOW EVERY SIMPLE TASK IS!!...
After that,I mellow out a little bit...Soak into the sounds of live "Jimmy",and then have the conversation with S and Q about getting a ride...It changes slightly each time but is basically the same...They disappear come back and disappear again...After seeing that for the third time,finally looking over and seeing that S was indeed NOT THERE I said fuck this,and got up...The living room was now clear and I could get my thoughts together there...
Out in the living room,M kept dropping by as I downloaded the strangest music I could think of,that turned out to not be there the next day...M would be laying on my couch smoking a cigarette,looking up at me and having conversation with me that once again I barely could hear...I'd talk back to him,pass things to him,blah blah,then he'd stand up suddenly...He'd get up and start walking and I'd follow his every move as he disappeared before my eyes...I've never felt so much like I was in dream before in my life...I talked to him at least four times and always seen him disappear...Why one just forgets about seeing someone disappearing I dont know,it's just how dramamine effects you...You always talk to them...
So many times I'd reach for an ashtray or a can of soda that I KNOW is there,and my hand goes right through it...It disappears right in front of you...This too you still try everytime...Sometimes you actually get ahold of something...
After too many hours of the shadows dancing and people vanishing in front of me I decide to sleep...I've never really remembered exact times that I go to bed,because that's so confusing...I usually only remember waking up still fucked up,in complete darkness,reaching for things...That is so incredibly hard...I reached for a soda so many times,but every time it was just a little from my grasp...After awhile I gave up and passed out again..The nightmare was over,it was time to really dream...
Overall it was fun...It totally takes all function on reality away from you,but every once and awhile you need that if you like psychadelics...Once you've done it enough it becomes fun because you know what to expect...When we first did it,we had no idea...But damn did we learn...
M had quite a night too...Something about walking out of a Caseys with a water bottle he though he paid for and getting chased down...He tried to find a dollar he was sure he had but couldn't..Eventually R paid for it and they went to play pool...On the way home some friends made sure he drove fine,as he would do nothing else,and were right behind him...I would never EVER suggest driving on dramamine to anyone,but M is a very large guy,and in his state of mind there was no way he wouldn't drive home...But he drove fine,10 or so under the speed limit at all times,and stopping a few times at strange places throwing those behind him for a loop...He'd get out,walk around for a second,talk to himself or someone else,then get back in his truck...Bad idea to let him drive but all turned out well...Safe and sound...
That's dramamine in a nutshell from a still recovering patient...thanks for reading....
[Edit: Fixed the title. -C22]
[ 26 September 2002: Message edited by: Catch-22 ]
If you've ever tried Dramamine(I'm not sure how many have I just know it's heavily used where I come from)then this story should sound pretty familiar...Dramamine is the one drug that I've experienced,and I've experienced many,that consistently have the exact same results...The most intense feelings of deja vu and hallucinations that baffle the hell out of you are there every time....But I'll get to that later...On to the story...
This one began a few days ago over my friend S's house...That was the place where things usually "went down" and this day was no different...My friend R had just purchased an ounce and had hoped to pick up acid at the same time...The acid never showed and we got to talking about how we haven't fried in the longest time...And everytime we talk about frying,Dramamine always pops up...Our group had extensively used Dramamine as something to do when we couldn't find anything else,because we always remember how bad it fucked us up before...Well,out of nowhere,my friend M jumps up remembers he had bought a 36 pack of Dram not too long ago,and totally forgotten about them...A bad feeling in my stomach was brewing....
He comes back brandishing the largest ammount of Dramamine I've ever seen and the queezy feeling of ingesting those bastards lurks out...I convince myself----NO...NO MATTER WHAT THEY SAY...NO!...And I tried to stick to that...But the compassion for my friends R,who has been hounded the past year by his mother,and thrown from rehab to rehab...Dramamine could be detected on his drug tests from AfterCare,and he for some reason just loves to see people fucked up so he can have fun with them-living vicariously through them...When M decides to do it as long as he can have a bud to smoke later on,R began giving the same offer to everyone around...All said no harshly,as I should of done...
But I hadn't fried in a lonnnnnng time...We had been hoping for acid for such a long time,and it had once again failed...This really disappointed me and put me in a-I NEED HALLUCINOGENS-mode...I battled for a minuted on the reprocussions,and the mindfuck that could ensue,and then open my hand for R to shovel them into...I grab a Mountain Dew and toss the pills back,making sure not to taste it at any cost...Tasting the pills can give you the worst case of nausea ever with dramamine...You just taste it forever and everytime you wanna be sick...
After that was done I knew it was over...Any remains of valid thought I wanted for this day were over...I was entering another world tonight...
Bowls were passed around but I refused them...Smoking before Dram always makes me extremely paranoid about what I see...I just sat there and watched it go round,glaring at the sun which was almost down,and waited for the effects...They kick in so subtley you hardly notice it...A weird light flash above you,that you swear is lighting,but are told is not...A word or a sentence sounding kind of distant to you...Like someone was whispering...If your sitting,the first time you stand up is the way you know...You stand up in what seems like forever,and it feels like you've left your head behind where you were sitting...When you walk,it's almost impossible to walk a straight line,because everything look likes an obstacle that either may or may not be there...If you've done it before you usually stop and kick whatever it is,and if you feel a resistance then it's real...If your foot sails through the object and it disappears right before your eyes,then obviously you know its fake...
When I finally stood up to get a better look at the sky and trace whether or not I was seeing lighting in the skies,it hit me like a brick to the head...All of a sudden all around you are flashes of light,that in the onset almost never stop until you start walking...You constantly look over to see them,and their gone,even though you know you can't catch it...Your eyes are just drawn to it...In the night,shadows are the most intense things possible under the influence of dram...They get up and dance and move around all sorts of crazy shit that you are always drawn to look at...with the flashes of light and the shadows jumping out at you,it's pretty had to walk...Not to forget the aforementioned "obstacles"...After awhile I got used to it...But I felt the need to get up and walk around some and sit back down with the intent of doing something,but forgetting by the time I got to where I thought I should have been going...If nobody else is on the shit,you look like the dumbest person in existence...But it's excusable...
Everyone but S and R were playing hacky sack over by a streetlight across the street,and it looked like a bunch people just dancing weirdly in the streets...I had to remind myself a million times that it was my friends over there...M who had also dropped,was playing with them,somehow someway...I could never handle hacky sack on dram no fuckin way...I'd go to hit it and find out nobody had hacked to me...
Around 9 oclock I was ready to go...It had been a solid hour of madness,and I needed to retreat home to regroup...R came as they were leaving with M to play Pool,and gave me my piece,and I got a ride home right after with another friend...I prayed and prayed my mom wouldn't be up and of course as soon as I walk in the door there she was,glaring at me objectionally...I walked by trepidaciously and grabbed a soda from the kitchen...By the time I came out my mom was gone...I asked my step dad where she had gone,and he told me she was in her rooming sleeping...
Oh god,she's not even fucking there...
I rolled my eyes as if to say-"oh silly me"-then attempted to high tail it to my room...That was a narrow escape,and the fact that my mom wasn't there scared the shit out of me...I stumbled toward my cd player and put on a live tool playlist I had made,and crashed hard onto my bed...What the fuck had I done?...Every time I do it I wonder why I just decided to put myself through the complete confusion a Dram fry...It always baffles me...Then I forget about it start talking to people who aren't there...
I looked at the cigarette in my hand and brought up to my face to take a drag...When I got absolutely nothing I looked at my hand and realized the cigarette was not real at all...This happens all the time to almost every person I know that smokes and has taken the pills...Everytime you try,because you never know if you did actually light a cigarette or not...That takes forever too because sometimes there is no cigarette...It's a neverending cycle of mindfucking...This happened all throughout the night...
I looked up at my chair which now inhabited S but he was turned away from me...I look over to my left and see someone I hadn't seen at all that day,Q,sitting on my couch rubbing his goatee like always...I turn back to S and he's gone...I look at Q and say something...He replies with something I can't hear,and I turn back to S..He's there now,and I ask him how he was gonna get home...He turns and says "I don't know" real worriesome,and I look over at Q to ask him for a ride...He of course is now absent too...I look back at S and he's gone too...By this time I was ready to smoke a bowl...
It was about 10:30 when I tried searching for the bowl...I grabbed it and set it down to grab the weed in my wallet...I can't find it and look down and the bowl is gone...I hadn't actually tooken it out...I take it out and rub it to make sure it's really there,then set it down again...I reach for my wallet and now I can't find it...Check my back pocket and it's not there...Dammit...I look all around my room,find it underneath a blanket somehow,and then take it out to put in the bowl...I go to pack it and forget that I don't have bowl...I grab the bowl,sit down,and lose the weed...This cycle goes on and on until I finally get everything situated and smoke it....THIS IS HOW EVERY SIMPLE TASK IS!!...
After that,I mellow out a little bit...Soak into the sounds of live "Jimmy",and then have the conversation with S and Q about getting a ride...It changes slightly each time but is basically the same...They disappear come back and disappear again...After seeing that for the third time,finally looking over and seeing that S was indeed NOT THERE I said fuck this,and got up...The living room was now clear and I could get my thoughts together there...
Out in the living room,M kept dropping by as I downloaded the strangest music I could think of,that turned out to not be there the next day...M would be laying on my couch smoking a cigarette,looking up at me and having conversation with me that once again I barely could hear...I'd talk back to him,pass things to him,blah blah,then he'd stand up suddenly...He'd get up and start walking and I'd follow his every move as he disappeared before my eyes...I've never felt so much like I was in dream before in my life...I talked to him at least four times and always seen him disappear...Why one just forgets about seeing someone disappearing I dont know,it's just how dramamine effects you...You always talk to them...
So many times I'd reach for an ashtray or a can of soda that I KNOW is there,and my hand goes right through it...It disappears right in front of you...This too you still try everytime...Sometimes you actually get ahold of something...
After too many hours of the shadows dancing and people vanishing in front of me I decide to sleep...I've never really remembered exact times that I go to bed,because that's so confusing...I usually only remember waking up still fucked up,in complete darkness,reaching for things...That is so incredibly hard...I reached for a soda so many times,but every time it was just a little from my grasp...After awhile I gave up and passed out again..The nightmare was over,it was time to really dream...
Overall it was fun...It totally takes all function on reality away from you,but every once and awhile you need that if you like psychadelics...Once you've done it enough it becomes fun because you know what to expect...When we first did it,we had no idea...But damn did we learn...
M had quite a night too...Something about walking out of a Caseys with a water bottle he though he paid for and getting chased down...He tried to find a dollar he was sure he had but couldn't..Eventually R paid for it and they went to play pool...On the way home some friends made sure he drove fine,as he would do nothing else,and were right behind him...I would never EVER suggest driving on dramamine to anyone,but M is a very large guy,and in his state of mind there was no way he wouldn't drive home...But he drove fine,10 or so under the speed limit at all times,and stopping a few times at strange places throwing those behind him for a loop...He'd get out,walk around for a second,talk to himself or someone else,then get back in his truck...Bad idea to let him drive but all turned out well...Safe and sound...
That's dramamine in a nutshell from a still recovering patient...thanks for reading....
[Edit: Fixed the title. -C22]
[ 26 September 2002: Message edited by: Catch-22 ]
