Mental Health Depression at Night

[Chronic Asshole]

Does anyone else experience this? I am not depressed all the time, at least not any more, just at night. I have been a heavy weed smoker for the past few years (all day every day basically), but quit nearly a month ago because I got to a point in my life where I was just so unmotivated and bored with my life that I constantly thought about suicide. I had no real issues to deal with, other than the weed that caused me to lose interest and basically become bored to the point that I did not look forward to anything and continuing through the drab monotony just seemed unbearable. All that is better now and I finally feel like I have a little bit of balance in my life now that I am not constantly high.

My problem is that I still get very depressed once the sun goes down. Its weird. I am completely fine during the day, but at night my mood will instantly shift towards a feeling of emptiness even though there is nothing at all in my life that should make me feel this way. Because I feel this way physiologically, my mind starts to wander and come up with reasons why I am feeling this way. I end up fabricating reasons as to why I am feeling depressed even though I know they cant possibly be true and the next morning I can see through my bullshit. This is becoming problematic because it tempts me into a quick fix via drugs. Mostly opiates.

Does anyone else experience this? What can I do to balance out my brain chemistry. I'm thinking SAD may have something to do with this (I wake up at noon to 1pm every day and the sun sets at 5pm... goddamn Canadian winters), but I can remember experiencing this in the summer time as well in the periods where I was clean a few years back. Any suggestions are greatly appreciated.

 

[kittyinthedark]

Check out the suggestions in the SAD thread. It could well be that that's your issue. I also recommend trying out exercise in the afternoon. It will kinda rev you up for the nighttime and hopefully help keep you a little more upbeat. Also, are you busy during the day but not at night? I know that with my depression, if I keep busy, I do a lot better, but as soon as I'm home, especially if I'm alone, my mind starts going shitty places. If that's part of the problem, try to find a hobby or something to keep you busy.

 

[flyhighk]

I felt this way for like 2 weeks then got on zoloft.
I used to feel completely fine until about 6 pm. Then I start feeling depressed and hopeless.

 

[ad lib]

It very well could be SAD because it occurs after darkness. Also, it may be anxiety related. I know personally at night that's when my anxiety and depression gets worse because I have nothing to do expect think.

Are you male or female? The reason I ask is because it may be related to hormone levels dropping significantly at night.

 

[flyhighk]

A male... which hormones drop at night?

 

[Tude]

I wonder if it's the fact that the sun goes down that causes this (kind of like SAD) or simply the fact that you have less things to do towards the end of the day and it gives you more time to think? I'd suggest trying to stay busy after dark and see if it helps distract your mind. If this doesn't help, you can try the suggestions in the SAD thread like has already been suggested. Hope you feel better soon!

 

[herbavore]

I am a big fan of actually greeting the depressed feelings with an attitude of exploration? When you feel them come on, what thoughts accompany the feelings? You can work with a therapist on stuff like this or you can just do it yourself. Ask yourself questions. Am I restless? Lonely? Anxious? What am I feeling exactly? Is it always the same or does it have different aspects on different nights? Am I actually sad about something that I need to acknowledge or is this unspecified?

When I experience depression I feel like it is usually that I am trying to evade thinking about things that make me feel overwhelmed. Affirmations can feel silly and trite but they work wonders for me as a way to talk back to my own negative thoughts.

It is fantastic that you were able to change such a deep habit. I think this is the next part of your process--exploring this depression that happens at night, getting to know what it is that it needs to tell you and going from there.