curious to see if anyone has been in a similar situation...

[Mysterie]

so at the moment i'm 20 and living with my parents, and its slowly eating away at my morale, my dad is retired so he is home most of the time, and he is the parent i get on the least with, i guess i have a bit of oedipus complex.

anyway my past work experience is being a kitchen hand at kitchens and the industry is at the point where you need to know a manager at a place to work somewhere better than a shit job with bad hours and bad pay

i dont have the best communication skills, but i can keep up a conversation although it often gets to the point where i dont have more to say unless you ask me questions

so working in sales etc would be good for me but atm seems unacheivable

i want to go to uni soon so i am not wasting my life but still really need to get a job that will pay 250$ Aus+ and i can manage with low standards job wise but it helps me a lot working a job which has a timetable (you know what days are work days)

my short term solution is to do an hour of housework around the house every day of the week, that way my parents pay me 15$ an hour for the work and i have 105$ a week to start saving up, and i know it sounds like my parents are nice and reasonable, but there are lots of other factors like they are both fundamentalist catholic and do not sway on any part of their belief system and take bible for truth, also we live next to a school and our dog barks constantly most days from 10:30-11 and 1-2 and it drives me off the wall, also its a fairly dysfunctional household

i know that house-sharing can get really really shit, but at least then i can back my bags and find some where better

so i was wondering, have any of you been in this situation in the past, what did you do with mild-moderate social anxiety in terms of getting a job that doesn't suck your soul?
or if your in a similar position, what steps are you taking to get yourself out of it?

 

[Jerry Atrick]

I've been there. In my early twenties I got a couple of DWIs and lost my driver's license for 5 years. I bounced around, living with different family members until I eventually ended up in a house with my mom and stepdad. I know how bad it sucks. It got so bad for me that I got a job washing dishes in a nursing home just to get out of the house. Talk about soul-sucking. Don't get me wrong, talking to the old folks was the good part of the job. I just hate washing dishes.

My point is that nobody cares how bad the job sucks. If it pays enough to get you out of your situation and into an apartment, you can always get a better job later. I won't lie, it took me a couple of years to save up the money to buy a used car once I got my license back. Eventually I was able to afford to break off on my own again and get an apartment. Of course, I paid my parents rent the whole time I had a job.

It was not easy and did not happen over night. The sooner you get a job, the sooner you'll be out of that situation. I apologize if it seems like I don't have sympathy for your anxiety but I have a worse mental diagnosis than that and I didn't use it as an excuse to leech off my parents.

You're still young and it sounds like you have a lot of growing up to do. Believe it or not, working a shit job will make you appreciate what you have, once you have it. I promise, you will meet some interesting people.

 

[llama112]

So why can't you get a job in fast food? Those jobs are all over the place here, they always have "help wanted" signs. Since you have kitchen experience, you could easily work in a kitchen there, right?

 

[Joeof1]

Costco is paying like $24 an hour if you are near Sydney. I know the one near Blacktown was hiring. Also there are jobs open everywhere, you just have to go out the door and find them.

Also, that is not a dysfunctional family in the least. That sounds just a normal Australian family to me. I know where I was staying there were 2BR flats for around $400 a week. There are also a lot of people that have those sublets built in their back yard around there as well.

 

[pk.]

The fact that you don't want a standard job is a good sign, it means you want something more out of life. The truth is that there will be a low chance at finding an enjoyable job in the direct entry role. Good places to look are the major supermarkets, they often have jobs available even if not advertised, just throw a resume in. If you don't like customer service too much you can maybe try a service station, night shifts are quiet and you don't have to do much. I guess what I learned from doing a number of low paying jobs is that I wanted something more and that it required further education; in that regard they can be a great motivator and not just a drain on the soul. Moving out seems good also, I didn't get along with my family either, it's amazing the amount of change you can go through in a more supportive environment where people share similar values to you.

 

[Bardeaux]

anyway my past work experience is being a kitchen hand at kitchens and the industry is at the point where you need to know a manager at a place to work somewhere better than a shit job with bad hours and bad pay

have the best communication skills, but i can keep up a conversation although it often gets to the point where i dont have more to say unless you ask me questions

so working in sales etc would be good for me but atm seems unacheivable

If you've been out of work for awhile you may be over thinking the process. I was the same, and growing up in America I always found the process extremely difficult and would never receive an interview unless I had inside connections. After moving to Australia, I got a call back on the very first job I sent a resume into. With your kitchen experience, have you considered cafe work? There are SO many around (depending on your location, of course) and the classifieds are full of open positions preferring someone with previous hospitality experience.

i want to go to uni soon so i am not wasting my life but still really need to get a job that will pay 250$ Aus+ and i can manage with low standards job wise but it helps me a lot working a job which has a timetable (you know what days are work days)

Honestly, if you can stay at home for a few months while also working part time and going to uni you could save up for a new place very quickly. Even working 20-25 hours a week will bring in well over the $250.

 

[thujone]

Heh I was also in a similar position when I was 20. Going to university these days is a sucker's game (because everyone's doing it) unless you're getting into a field that there's enough demand for to actually pay off your loans afterwards (i.e. B.A.? No way) but if you get a shitty job and earn enough to move out that's good for the time being. I don't know how it goes in OZ but here in Canada it's good enough to save up money to pay the first and last month rent, then look around very very thoroughly until you find a place where you can get a proper night's sleep in quiet without dogs barking and other bullshit. Great places do exist for cheap, just takes a lot of sniffing around so don't settle for the first thing that seems good. IME if a place looks perfect within the first five minutes, there is something wrong. Then you just need to save up enough to get into a tech/trade school, whatever the cheapest post-secondary option is, and at the very least credentials you get there will let you step up to a better job and earn more for whatever you want to do in the future. Take your time, but don't sit on your laurels either. That's all I could advise.

 

[L2R]

i'm in sydney and the only people i have shared accomodation with are japanese who are on either student or temp work visas. that way, you avoid most of the shit that comes with living with a local. you just need to have the deposit and credit history to get a 2 bedder to start with and then sublet via cheers and other japanese language websites (google translate is fine, but it's better to get a japanese mate to write up the ad).

this is all longer term and no quick solution. are you currently partying/getting high? i'd suggest putting that on hold if you are, to save money and get a clear head on the direction you want to go.

remember when moving out, you need to factor expenses like whitegoods and furniture.

with regards to work, just be applying a lot. try things you land, and give them a good go. each builds your tolerance of others and will help with your anxieties and skills even if you eventually find you don't like that kind of work. take some risks. extend those comfort zones.

 

[Stevenski]

Go get a forklift license & do a first aid course. It will take three days & make you much more employable regardless of your job especially the first aid. Do you have a car? That will widen your job search & you can go for a relatively stress free job like customer support or working in a warehouse until you decide what to do. Some larger companies can have great advancement prospects if you put in a few years work too & never find your perfect job. It will also get you away from your old man for 10 hours a day at least.

 

[Ds]

hang in there man, get the fuck out of ur parents house man. convince them that you will be a fulltime student, (AND get a shitty place to work to let them know u will help pay bills etc).
doing this was the best thing i could have done, getting out of the folks place, and being a responsible grownup for paying my bills on time(the $ went to my parents,so they could pay with their cards n shit).

you dont know how good it felt to be on my own, yea i was working making $6.00hr@quiznos(this was b4 mininmum wage went up) n going to school full time.

long story short, i now work for an engineering firm,and working on nearly a 1billion dollar job. how the fuck did this happen i ask myself? ..well i look back at where i came from, nothing but shit until i had enough construction experience(like stevenski said get them forklift n first-aid cards!)

it is possible man, know without really a BS degree, the better paying job will involve more work,stress,and chance of getting hurt.

hey man if ur willing to relocate theres tons of opportunity along the gulf of mexico to work offshore(with no work experience).