Hello, I frequently view the site and its valuable information that others have to offer. A little about me. Well, lets see I started recreationaly taking OC's in December. Would pop 7.5-10mg every other weekend or so. Nobody really wants to be addicted, but I guess you really never know you are till it happens. During spring break, so march, I went on a 5 day binge with a buddy. Ended up boosting my tolerance from about 15mg to a 30mg by the end of the binge. After that I got a little back on track with everything still only doing it about every weekend, but using almost a whole 30. Slowly this became 2 or 3 times a week, since I had 3 different people wanting me to do it with them (Who were worse then me as far as dosage goes), and as the months progressed every other day, till where I am now, and I cant remember the last day I didn't use.
Currently, I use about 45mg-60mg to get an okay high, sometimes 75 is usual, and sometimes rarely 90mg. I hit over 100 one day, and couldn't believe myself, at where I am, and how my money is just flying out the door.
Basically I am trying to get clean. I didn't use yesterday. I hear how horrible all these withdrawal symptoms are. There have been a few times where I just wouldn't use, but on the 2nd day of not using, I would get all these sudden onset flu-like symptoms. Today I don't really have any of that. And in fact, I've been feeling pretty great all day, but at the same time, waiting for these symptoms to come on. I hope I continue on this hill of naturally feeling good. Last night sleep was nearly impossible, and I remember the sun coming up after tossing and turning for hours. (not even a melatonin or some nyquil would knock me out, unless it did and I just woke up a ton)
My friend who is also struggling with addiction (2x-4x worse then me) gave me a strip of suboxone in case I start withdrawing. I've looked up the COWS test on when to take it, and even read about the PAWS guide on another website. I just dont feel any of this is that bad for me, even though I feel my "addiction" started in march. So about 3 months of using at least 3-7 times a week progressively getting worse over time.
In addition, when I use, I only have one starter dose, then about 2-3 more booster doses shortly after. I'm not sure if this is why my symptoms dont seem that bad since some people use multiple times throughout the day. I also take 45mg DXM about a half hour before dropping. I regularly exercise, so that may be another possible way my body is fighting to restore endorphin balance, but I'm no expert.
I'm forcing myself to eat, and keep hydrated. Trying to be in a positive mood, and mentally thinking that I can do anything and am on top of the world. So far it seems like it has been working today. Yesterday I was evaluating where I am in life and had a few breakdowns, but thats just the hole, that the drug has sucked me in. It's very tricky in making me think that taking more will make everything better, but the reality is that it won't and I cant be dependent on it.
Anyways, the point is I have the suboxone, and I want to be clean. I'm not sure if I should take any of it, or if I should see how the rest of the week goes, or even the next 24 hours. Today is Day 2 of not popping any, yet I dont feel that crappy, compared to how others have said day 2 is THE worse day of withdrawing. I'm not sure where I should continue from here. If anything I felt irritable, and worse overall yesterday/night.
-Using for about 7 months, but probably addicted for 3
-Want's to be clean.
-2 days clean as of 6/5/13
-Dosage is around 60-75mg(total, 30-37starter) for a pretty good high. Pre-loads with DXM
-Has suboxone on hand, but not feeling any intense withdrawal symptoms
-Not sure if should wait out, or what exactly the next smart move is.
Currently, I use about 45mg-60mg to get an okay high, sometimes 75 is usual, and sometimes rarely 90mg. I hit over 100 one day, and couldn't believe myself, at where I am, and how my money is just flying out the door.
Basically I am trying to get clean. I didn't use yesterday. I hear how horrible all these withdrawal symptoms are. There have been a few times where I just wouldn't use, but on the 2nd day of not using, I would get all these sudden onset flu-like symptoms. Today I don't really have any of that. And in fact, I've been feeling pretty great all day, but at the same time, waiting for these symptoms to come on. I hope I continue on this hill of naturally feeling good. Last night sleep was nearly impossible, and I remember the sun coming up after tossing and turning for hours. (not even a melatonin or some nyquil would knock me out, unless it did and I just woke up a ton)
My friend who is also struggling with addiction (2x-4x worse then me) gave me a strip of suboxone in case I start withdrawing. I've looked up the COWS test on when to take it, and even read about the PAWS guide on another website. I just dont feel any of this is that bad for me, even though I feel my "addiction" started in march. So about 3 months of using at least 3-7 times a week progressively getting worse over time.
In addition, when I use, I only have one starter dose, then about 2-3 more booster doses shortly after. I'm not sure if this is why my symptoms dont seem that bad since some people use multiple times throughout the day. I also take 45mg DXM about a half hour before dropping. I regularly exercise, so that may be another possible way my body is fighting to restore endorphin balance, but I'm no expert.
I'm forcing myself to eat, and keep hydrated. Trying to be in a positive mood, and mentally thinking that I can do anything and am on top of the world. So far it seems like it has been working today. Yesterday I was evaluating where I am in life and had a few breakdowns, but thats just the hole, that the drug has sucked me in. It's very tricky in making me think that taking more will make everything better, but the reality is that it won't and I cant be dependent on it.
Anyways, the point is I have the suboxone, and I want to be clean. I'm not sure if I should take any of it, or if I should see how the rest of the week goes, or even the next 24 hours. Today is Day 2 of not popping any, yet I dont feel that crappy, compared to how others have said day 2 is THE worse day of withdrawing. I'm not sure where I should continue from here. If anything I felt irritable, and worse overall yesterday/night.
-Using for about 7 months, but probably addicted for 3
-Want's to be clean.
-2 days clean as of 6/5/13
-Dosage is around 60-75mg(total, 30-37starter) for a pretty good high. Pre-loads with DXM
-Has suboxone on hand, but not feeling any intense withdrawal symptoms
-Not sure if should wait out, or what exactly the next smart move is.