Cocaine washed up on Sussex beach

I don’t suppose that one of you can go ask them if they found a big bunch of keys in one of the pockets of those life jackets? Big bunch of keys and a Mercedes Benz key fob? Asking for a friend.

Oh. He says keys were on a gold engraved keyring with the letters “TM”. And two empty Glock clips also.

Can he just go to “Lost and Found” there maybe?
 
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How did we go from my possibly losing my car, house, and boat keys on or around the same night that my crew had to frantically ditch a shipment, close to that area, to tennis shoes and Boris getting married? 🤣

And by the way: somebody is taking the piss i.e. it was exactly 1 metric ton not 960kg so there's 40kg unaccounted for! Bastards! ☠️

Oops. The above according to SWIM. I just lent the cunt my Cigarette 42X and car. No idea what he was up to that night. 🤣
 
The Wizard of the Creek said:
Please do not use SWIM. Whoever SWIM is, is a fucking rookie. Also, the use of SWIM defeats its purpose after admitting to engaging in illegal activity.
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Oh for fuck sake! This again! 🤣

See my use of SWIM in context! You think I'm a rank amateur here or what? Cocaine washed up on shore? Life jackets? Cigarette boat? Every pun was intended by my use of the acronym! 🤣


The Wizard of the Creek said:
I hope someone found a way to at least get high before the fuzzz got to it.
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Gee thanks. Nice mate you are! 🤣

Do you have any idea what this little escapade cost SWIM (apparently)? 🤣 🤣 🤣

All I got out of the deal was an expensive boat returned with scratches on it and on empty and with all life jackets missing and not to mention the ignition key, had to collect my car using the spare key, had to break into my own storage facility, and my gold Tony Montana keyring is missing! You know what a new key fob costs for a Maybach S600 Guard? And because of the security component: you don't just walk into your local MB dealer and ask for a replacement! 🤣 So yeah I'm pissed! My fault. I should have known better. If you want something done proper then you do it yourself!


Suppose I'd better watch out with these stories. Because one of these fine days... 🤣 🤣 🤣
 
The Wizard of the Creek said:
SWIM should be ashamed of themselves.
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SWIM was ashamed. But SWIM already SWIMMING with the fishes! 🤣 🤣 🤣 Nobody scratches my boat!


I'd love to continue with this story. We could write a book or a movie script. But like I said: one of these fine days... :unsure:

We have a saying here in Afrikaans that goes "van lekker lag kom lekker huil" which, loosely translated, means that many tears can be the result of having a good laugh i.e. tears can result from too much mucking about or taking the piss even in jest!

It'd be fuck funny if they did indeed find any of the items mentioned in the pocket of one of those life jackets now wouldn't it! 🤣 🤣 🤣
 
I thought for fun I'd carry the story on a little longer! 🤣

Seems as though I've found my new car. An Aurus Senat. Went into official production today.

Leaves me with a bit of a problem. Anybody interested in a used, very low mileage, MB Maybach S600 Guard. Good price. Wouldn't go driving it through any borders or through any road blocks what with the dogs and all (some white powder looking residue in the corners of the boot and no idea what it is so you takes your chances) (and for sure I'm not cleaning it out i.e. you take it "as is"). Also only comes with one key fob. You can collect the other from the Sussex police I think! Oh and I want the key ring back.
 
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TripSitterNZ said:
why is that when coke washes up on beaches all the square cunts find it first and report to the police fucking hell if i saw $80m worth of drugs appear id consume them as a life time supply and start my own brothel.
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Because no one's gonna touch obvious cartel coke and risk a lifetime of paranoia over whether or not the gangsters will find out and come'a knockin. 🤷‍♂️
If you don't have the right resources/connections to sell all that at once, it's just a giant liability. The risks far outweigh any reward.
 
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tweakerguy said:
Because no one's gonna touch obvious cartel coke and risk a lifetime of paranoia over whether or not the gangsters will find out and come'a knockin. 🤷‍♂️
If you don't have the right resources/connections to sell all that at once, it's just a giant liability. The risks far outweigh any reward.
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its not a giant liability lol. Anybody in the modern world with the internet could offload a kilo of cocaine within a day.
 
TripSitterNZ said:
its not a giant liability lol. Anybody in the modern world with the internet could offload a kilo of cocaine within a day.
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Something tells me the average citizen isn't gonna weigh the risks (law enforcement &/or Cartels) and hop on the dark web to move a kilo in under a few hours lol

But crazier things have happened, im sure
 
TripSitterNZ said:
why is that when coke washes up on beaches all the square cunts find it first and report to the police fucking hell if i saw $80m worth of drugs appear id consume them as a life time supply and start my own brothel.
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Because people who find a boatload of coke and keep it don't tell the newspapers.
 
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