Mental Health Chronic Depersonalisation/Derealisation(Dream like state) resulting from panic attack

[legal_hi]

Hi, This is somewhat a continuation from my previous thread about dexamphetamine and some unusual side effects

Link : http://www.bluelight.ru/vb/threads/...amine-5mg-IR-tablets-unusual-bad-side-effects

Basically after having a panic attack after taking a very small dosage of dex, I have strange residual effects on my brain.

The next day after having what I believe to be a panic attack at school, my head is no longer the same. I feel as though I am under the influence of benzos or cannabis in the sense that I have an ongoing cloudy mind and my vision and perception of my surroundings has changed to a somewhat dopey dreamlike state that is impossible to snap out of. This has been going on for about a week (to this day) but seems to be gradually becoming less pronounced.

I am experiencing things such as:
- changes in vision
- cloudy mind
- even more difficulty in concentrating
- a general drop in intelligence (I find it extra hard to understand very simple things)
- loss of appetite
- more fatigued (I don't want to get out of bed in the morning)


I had searched online about this and came up with anxiety related forums with people experiencing the exact same thing as me.

Quotes from other forums:

I totally get what you mean about not feeling like yourself.
In 2007 I had my first big panic attack. It took around a year or so to recover fully. For a long time I felt as though I was in a haze. Everything felt like a dream, people didn't have depth, the air around me was frightening. I would wake up in a panic every couple of hours at night while I slept. After a short stint of agoraphobia thereafter, I pulled myself out from under the covers and out of bed and got help. I was taking Citalopram and was also prescribed Lorazepam to help take the edge off. Finally, through time and proper medication management, I started to feel better.

in january i had a panic attack and ever since then its all been going down hill. i dont have much of an appetite, im tired all the time, i constantly have this weird feeling in my head. kind of like pressure but also kind of like im out of it a little bit. for example someone will say something to me and after i say something back i find myself asking if i really did say it or did i just think i said it. isometimes violent thoughts, i dont ever leave my house anymore because as soon as i get somewhere i feel really tired and irritated and i just want to go home. i dont find ANYTHING fun anymore. i used to go fishing and bowling every chance that i got, now i dont even do that anymore. i want to get out and have fun but its like my brain and body wont let me. i feel like the person i used to be is someone else. i just want that life back again. i tried antidepressants but they just made everything ALOT worse. what should i do?? im scared of feeling like this. please help...

After a severe panic attack I'm left with this horrible feeling that can last for years after.Every couple of years I have a huge episode of panic and then after a year or 2 I'll start to feel like myself again.Then it'll happen all over again.After a bad episode everything looks and feels different.My house doesn't feel like home,I don't get the same feeling when it's sunny outside,my family members don't seem the same.My perception of everything gets altered for a long time and since my first attack at 14,I would say I have never felt right again.After a panic attack I live in fear of getting another,so I avoid all kinds of social situations that I would normally take part in.Does anyone get this?

The sections of these quotes in bold are identical to what I am experiencing.


With further searching I found a wikipedia page about "Depersonalization" http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Depersonalization

Section from the wiki page:

Depersonalization (or depersonalisation) is an anomaly of self-awareness. It consists of a feeling of watching oneself act, while having no control over a situation.[1] Subjects feel they have changed, and the world has become vague, dreamlike, less real, or lacking in significance. It can be a disturbing experience, since many feel that, indeed, they are living in a "dream". Chronic depersonalization refers to depersonalization disorder, which is classified by the DSM-IV as a dissociative disorder. Though degrees of depersonalization and derealization can happen to anyone who is subject to temporary anxiety/stress, chronic depersonalization is more related to individuals who have experienced a severe trauma or prolonged stress/anxiety. Depersonalization-derealization is the single most important symptom in the spectrum of dissociative disorders, including dissociative identity disorder and "dissociative disorder not otherwise specified" (DD-NOS). It is also a prominent symptom in some other non-dissociative disorders, such as anxiety disorders, clinical depression, bipolar disorder, schizophrenia,[2] borderline personality disorder, obsessive-compulsive disorder, migraine and sleep deprivation. It can be considered desirable, such as in the use of recreational drugs.

I am wondering if anyone here has experienced anything similar and what their outcome was.

I have consulted a doctor which couldn't tell me much except for the fact that I should go and see a psychiatrist.

Any input would be greatly appreciated.

 

[WhatIsWrongWithMe]

How is your sexual health?

I am experiencing the same thing after a major depressive episode for about 5.5 months now. I've had sexual dysfunction the whole time.

 

[Allein]

I would really try and deal with the here and now, it may seem there has been a massive step change relating to a specific event but this is often not really the case and just part of the whole anxiety cycle.

Dwelling on why you feel this way will not help, you don't say if you have tried anything specific to alleviate these feelings, a good place to start would be making sure you are eating well, some routing and light exercise preferably outside in the sunshine.

Try not to dwell on this panic attack as it just leads to more anxiety which feeds the symptoms you are having, I suffered a nasty bout of derealisation that led to a breakdown, realising just how anxious and worried I had become about my own state of mind was the start of recovery.

Give yourself a break, you're still standing and the rest will fall back into place in time

 

[Libby]

It happens from hyperventilating.
If you are experiencing dissociative states following a panic attack, you are hyperventilating during your panic attack.
http://www.medicoscentro.com/Pio_Ab...yperventilation_in_dissociative_disorders.pdf
It may be hard, but try to breathe slower, and less, put your hand on your tummy and feel your tummy expand when you breathe instead of just movement high up in your chest. You are burning out your CO2 whatsits and turning your blood too acidic

 

[Libby]

This is a better link.
http://www.sierrabiotech.com/bt_hyperventilation.html

Acute hyperventilation syndrome it's called.

 

[Allein]

It happens from hyperventilating.
If you are experiencing dissociative states following a panic attack, you are hyperventilating during your panic attack.
http://www.medicoscentro.com/Pio_Ab...yperventilation_in_dissociative_disorders.pdf
It may be hard, but try to breathe slower, and less, put your hand on your tummy and feel your tummy expand when you breathe instead of just movement high up in your chest. You are burning out your CO2 whatsits and turning your blood too acidic

Interesting, I've never been great at the discipline of meditation or yoga which I guess would help address the breathing issue but I have found that Tai Chi was really useful. I had a great teacher who was aware of my mental health issues and helped me a lot, I had to stop due to a nasty injury but I really should go back to it.

I never have classic panic attacks with hyperventilation and pounding heart but eventually realised I was creating a vicious cycle, the more disconnected and 'un-real' I felt the more I focussed on it and panicked about it, unfortunately I had ended up in quite a bad way by that point.

 

[Libby]

The counselor lady at sexual abuse help told me about it because I was having flashbacks and hyperventilating without realizing because I felt like I was suffocating/ not getting enough air so I didn't know I was actually taking in too much air during these flashbacks (which are not quite panic attacks but pretty similar). Apparently it's pretty common for people to be unaware of their hyperventilation, I would dissociate afterwards, like a trance like state I wouldn't move at all just tensed up in a ball pretty much not there like catatonic. I can do it on purpose too now that I know over breathing causes it, but it's not good lol.

 

[Allein]

I'm sorry to hear you have suffered that kind of abuse Libby, as a male I carry some level of shame for the heinous wrongs some men perpetrate.

It does seem that awareness of the cause and effect with anxiety and panic can really help, I had more general concerns about reality and other 'stuff' I'd focussed on as well as suffering severe depression.

I have had a course of Cognitive_behavioral_therapy which I also found very insightful.

 

[Libby]

Aint no thing, and gender is just societal conditioning no sense in apologizing on behalf of your gender, puurrrr

 

[Allein]

Aint no thing, and gender is just societal conditioning no sense in apologizing on behalf of your gender, puurrrr

Thanks, I know the logic but it is something that has bothered me and affected my own relationships, not really worked out why that is, I've never suffered any kind of abuse of that kind.

I've always related better to women in general, in that the few close relationships I have formed have been with women or in one case a transexual ( wondered why I was getting on so well with a 'male')

I really must get back to the Tai Chi, your posts have given me a little bit of motivation, thanks

 

[Libby]

You don't have to learn a tai chi or yoga or anything, just focus on your breath and try to slow it down and breathe less, I read somewhere online to aim to get it down to 5 breaths a minute but I don't know if that's a good goal or not since the lady that spoke to me when I went to that SAH place never said a specific number