Relapse Can't stay away from using friends/activities

[pbb34]

I've been addicted to various substances over the past 10 years, the past 1.5 years i managed to stay off the pills and dope which were my most serious addictions. I cant seem to let go of using friends (they are more alcoholics and the weekend coke crowd) not hardcore users. But I can seem to abstain from alcohol, weed and the powders on my own but when I put myself in a social situation I just cant, not possible. I'm considering changing my phone number but that wont solve this problem i'm sure. Ive known this crowd basically my whole life and all my friends are borderline alcoholics and party hard every weekend and thats basically my social activity my whole "adult life"...

Just seeing if anyone has experience with this and could maybe chime in. I've thought about this for endless hours, and just dont want to give up hanging out with some friends I've known most my life-even though i know i should.

 

[simco]

This is a tough problem. It's fixable, but it's very hard for almost everyone (certainly has been for me).

Your phone is a good place to start. Getting a new number is a good idea. Though you can also block individuals from calling you on most modern phones, and that works pretty well. Also important--deleting their numbers from your contacts so you don't reach for a connect when you're on the edge.

The larger issue, though, is figuring out what changes you can make in your life to move away from whatever scene you find damaging. It's really tough to cut ties and maintain those cuts if you don't replace them with other meaningful things. Ideally, new social outlets are great, since addiction really festers when we're isolated. (Of course some folks don't need as much social interaction, so YMMV). Maybe there are other folks--even family--whom you could reach out to? Personally, I found NA helpful in this respect, but NA/AA is not for everyone. Alternatively, finding other activities like work or hobbies can pick up some of the slack.

With both of these issues--the phone and your "new" social life--the basic premise is the same: it's helpful to surround yourself with people and activities that will give your recovery the strongest base possible.


Sim