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BFs, What's the nature of your relationship?

nooneanymore

nooneanymore

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Feb 20, 2012
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Do grown up people past the age of 25 here actually have best friends who aren't their gf/bf or spouse?

I think I missed the best friend train.

Most of my friendships from high school ended after a year or two for one reason or another. I went to a large college where I didn't know anyone and never really made friends. Now I work all of the time and have long commutes so I don't really expect to get to know anyone anytime soon. ...and I can't stand games at the moment, so I don't want to pursue a romantic relationship.

How did you meet your friend? How often do you hang out? On a scale of 1-5, how much do you think you could depend on your
friend to be there in case something comes up and you need help?

Aside from a past ex, I've never really met a friend that I could depend on to do anything.


The hermit life isn't all that bad.

loner.jpg



loner.jpg
 
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Lol. Love that second pic. Totally my life. :)

I don't have a best friend. My boyfriend would be my best friend. I don't have many friends in general - they come an go. I have "party friends" you know, that's about it. I have old friends that I talk to from time to time. I am fairly close with my family. But a best friend (besides my boyfriend and family) who I can actually count on no matter what - definitely doesn't exist.

I think I missed the best friend train as well lol. Sometimes I wish I had a best friend but I'm usually okay with not having one.
 
The best time of my life with girlfriends was 25-30. I still talk to those girls but they are all married or have live-in BFs. I met them at work, and I had a blast. We hung out for a long time, and there were two of us who were the "planners." The one planner moved across state and the second one got married and had a baby. :( The two of us left, the one girl has a live in BF and she and I see each other occasionally.

I do miss my girlfriends. Best girls on the planet, and the three people I could totally be myself with.
 
My spouse is definitely my best friend. But I still have best friends from high school. One of them lives in Houston with me now, and the others back in our hometown and dallas. While I don't see the others often I still consider them best friends. We catch up on occasions or around the holidays. Me and my buds can go months without talking to each other but as soon as we get together it's like no time has passed at all.
 
I haven't had a best friend in years. Nor do I have any "regular" people I hang with. Most of the people I considered friends either got married, died, or went to jail.

I'd rather be alone with my music and thoughts...if I want to go out I hang with people I don't know very well.
 
I'm 23, but I'm practically married so it counts...

My girl IS my best friend, but I do have a best guy friend. We were friends in high school, but he ended up to moving to Georgia and we started talking literally every single day. He eventually moved back, and we hang out about 4 times a month. Sometimes more, but usually once a week. We talk every single day, and I can count on him for everything.
 
I'm 36, I still hang out with some of my high school friends. I moved about an hour an a half away so I don't get to see them as often as I like. My "best" friend is going to move to this area soon so I'm pretty excited about that. I've met some really cool people through the website meet up.
 
i keep a large selection of friends from previous uni and those in my hometown that i know in recent years. living in london if it wasn't for my housemates i would be very lonely. made one friend on my course with the rest being acquaintances. need to get out and meet people outside my house.

basically you have to use skype/make an effort when you do find people on your wavelength. you cant leave it up to others to contact you every time. make the effort.

i have had a lot of sex but only one sexual relationship and i think that having a well rounded social network has helped make up for this deficiency in my life.

if i'm honest the distraction of a relationship can come when i've finished my course and have a job and money rolling in. i'm not that needy for a relationship though i would like it. its just difficult meeting gays in non club situations
 
llama112 said:
Lol. Love that second pic. Totally my life. :)

I don't have a best friend. My boyfriend would be my best friend. I don't have many friends in general - they come an go. I have "party friends" you know, that's about it. I have old friends that I talk to from time to time. I am fairly close with my family. But a best friend (besides my boyfriend and family) who I can actually count on no matter what - definitely doesn't exist.

I think I missed the best friend train as well lol. Sometimes I wish I had a best friend but I'm usually okay with not having one.
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I'm happy i came across this thread. Your post sums me up pretty well.

Sometimes i get a bit upset that i don't have a best friend but then i see my wife and the drama she is involved in because of her best friends .I can't help but feel that my situation is a blessing in disguise sometimes.
 
Outside of family, I don't have any best friends. Longtime friends, certainly, and a couple I've known since HS, but they're people I see and talk to a handful of times a year--a party here, a movie there, lunch or dinner somewhere. One of my closest friends is someone I haven't seen in years that I keep in contact with via snail mail; I find it's much easier to have a "heart-to-heart" with her from a thousand miles away than it would be in person with anyone. I guess you could say I have a love-hate relationship with emotional intimacy; when it comes out, it tends to be very strong and very embarrassing. God help me, but FTS.
 
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LuGoJ said:
I'm happy i came across this thread. Your post sums me up pretty well.

Sometimes i get a bit upset that i don't have a best friend but then i see my wife and the drama she is involved in because of her best friends .I can't help but feel that my situation is a blessing in disguise sometimes.
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I think I'm working on it. I'd like to have more friends, but how do you make friends? I never learned.
 
My S/O is my best friend, but the thing is, she was my best friend for 5 years before she was my S/O. We where best friends when we both involved in other relationships. Then we became each other's boo, but we are still best friends in the more typical meaning of that i.e. "Hey! Let's drop some MDMA and go to an electro show!" or "Hey, wanna go to teh hooka bar and see our bros and discuss pure mathematics?"

So, like it's pretty fucking dope... it's like having a best friend who you can have kinky sex with. :)
 
LuGoJ said:
I'm happy i came across this thread. Your post sums me up pretty well.

Sometimes i get a bit upset that i don't have a best friend but then i see my wife and the drama she is involved in because of her best friends .I can't help but feel that my situation is a blessing in disguise sometimes.
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Yes so true :). When I'm at work, a lot of my coworkers talk about drama with their friends and stuff. I'm just like, I don't have to deal with it. *I'm not saying that friends are bad* - just hearing about drama and stuff, I think I prefer having few friends and not many good friends. :)
I just don't connect with any of my high school friends or even college friends. I like hanging out with party friends hah.
 
nooneanymore said:
loner.jpg
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OMG, I loled so hard I woke my boyfriend up.

I think I missed the train too and I'm only 21! I live a sad, sad, lonely life. I only have like 2 friends. But we're pretty close--I think. o.O..

How did you meet your friend? How often do you hang out? On a scale of 1-5, how much do you think you could depend on your
friend to be there in case something comes up and you need help?

Friend #1: Met in preschool! We don't really hang out too often because she's always broke and always owes me money. o.O But we talk on the phone like once every two weeks or so but sometimes we don't talk to each other for months. We've known each other our whole lives so we're like sisters. If I needed her--I would say 5. I could call her any day--any time and I know she'll be there for me.

Friend #2: Highschool. We usually don't hang out too much because her mom is crazy strict. Her mom has been in Vietnam for a month though and we've been hanging out twice a week. I'll text her, "lets go to the bar" and she'll be like "ok" and I'll be like "pick you up in 30". She's always been there for me too so 5! :)
 
As you get older and relationships get more serious, it's only natural that your S/O becomes some-what of a best friend because you end up spending so much time with them. (they CAN'T fully take that role because you can't talk shit about your S/O TO your S/O when you are pissed at them :) )

I just decided a long time ago, never to really "rely" on anybody. That way, you'll never be disappointed in anyone.
I have a couple best friends. But not one of them live within an hour of me.
 
I have a best friend that I've known for 17 out of my 24 years. He is pretty much straight-edge. He's had a bit to drink before, and he tried pot once (one hit), but he basically doesn't do drugs ever. This makes our relationship a lot simpler in fact, as he knows I use a multitude of drugs and accepts me for who I am. I have a handful of other close friends, and one of my almost-best-friends is my drug-buddy, in that we'll do almost anything under the sun together. But it's my BFF whom I have the most open communication with, and I don't see it ending any time soon.

For a long time I didn't think I had a best friend. Every one of my friends had a shortcoming in a sense--they are either too selfish or different from me for things to be 100% comfortable. With my best friend though, he's an exception and I can expect him to be there for me always. It's really a rare thing, and I cherish it.
 
i am 30 and married. i have a couple of close friends besides my husband. i still converse with friends from high school and college, tho i don't really consider them close friends.

How did you meet your friend?
i met one very good friend back in college. we started chatting online lots and became close friends in real life too. then i have met a couple other very good friends on this site.

How often do you hang out?
we all live in different states, so not very often. but i talk to the friend i met in college on a daily basis. sometimes i will go several days/weeks/months without talking to the others.

On a scale of 1-5, how much do you think you could depend on your friend to be there in case something comes up and you need help?
if 5 is they would do what they can to help in heartbeat, i think all of my close friends would. it is comforting to know that i have people i can turn to if shit hits the fan.

for me, having close friends is more about trusting them and feeling comfortable around them than talking/seeing them on a regular basis. i feel like i am lucky that i have not one, but a few very close friends.
 
I've met some good people in recovery. my two closest friends are a couple who also met in recovery. I love em both dearly. I'm only 22 so I got plenty of time to make more friends. I have a good friend from high school who used to be my weed dealer. we became close though as we hung out over the years. he's one of few people who stood with me through my heroin addiction and was/is very supportive of my recovery.
 
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