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Bereaved help themselves to deceaesd's medications

halcyonsgs

Greenlighter
Joined
Dec 2, 2010
Messages
33
I posted that my dad died on 12/30, and thanks again to those BLs that wrote such supportive messages. My father was on heavy narcotics, plus Ativan for the last weeks of his life. The meds & administration of them were never documented to my satisfaction.One "caregiver" dosed him with a month's rx of MS in 11 days (or, alternately was she helping herself to that, the Fentanyl, hydrocodone cough syrup & Ativan. We'll never know. She didn't come back after the storm we had 12/26 here in the Northeast). After my dad's body was removed there was alot of hub-bub about "let's give the meds back to the oncologist so he can give them to people who can't afford them". WTF? That's illegal, just for starters. Anyway, the Ativan was left @ the house and I found out later that everyone was dipping into it. My stepmother just fell out for 12 hours after she took some & we couldn't plan the funeral without her, so anyway, it was weird. I am not insensitive to the anxiety and strss of the situation-I was his only daughter & we were really close. But as a someone who has worked in healthcare, I was concerned that people who virtually NEVER touch a drug like that and rarely drink alcohol would just dose themselves with no knowledge of amount, adverse reactions, etc. And me, the one who does use drugs, wouldn't have touched dad's medication. Anyway, sorry this is long. I'd love to hear your comments.
 
I can only hope his karma permits him a better sentient rebirth(human, boddhisattva, etc), although unless he was a very spiritual man, he is likely to be reborn as 'lesser' sentient(tree, rock, animal, etc). Also be aware the law requires that those meds be destroyed.

I apologize if this is upsetting for you. (I imagine it is)
 
Probably the shock of losing a spouse caused her make a stupid decision in regards to taking the meds.

My grandmother just passed away from cancer and there are prescriptions for fentanyl, vicodin, etc... laying around our house. What do you do with them but hold onto them for when you've injured yourself or you want to feel numb for a while? Flush them? Seems like a waste...
 
i have difficulty believing that someone who does not play with recreational drugs or even drink that much would dose themselves like that. the only way it can make sense to me is if they have a history that you may not be aware of.

but then bereavement can make people do strange things. on the plus side, it's fortunate no one has harmed themselves by accident, i guess.

my condolences for your loss.
 
Thanks you all for your input & kind words. The situation is one of many that has come up during the intensity of the experience that I just walk away from. I don't think I should impose my judgements & opinions right now. But it will be addressed in the future. And yes, the drugs should have been destroyed, or brought to a pharmacist for legal disposal. But I also agree that in general it's wasteful not to reuse perfectly good drugs. But there were so many people involved, & legal issues surfacing around his care, that I think everything should have been done by the book. But, again, It's not the right time to address it. So I'll complain about it here.
 
I don't think that would be rare at all. You have a group of folks mourning together. They're all upset and anxious. And in that group, surely one person would know that Ativan relieves anxiety. So, that person says, "You know, some of this medicine might be helpful for all of us", and they all start dosing. Makes perfect sense.
 
Sorry to hear about your dad.

I would encourage someone responsible to take custody of the medicine. You don't want any "accidents" happening, or any dependencies developing-- or simply the wallowing in the dramatic circumstance of ingesting the pills of a deceased loved one.

In the cases wherein illnesses are relieved or the person taking the medication passes away, the drugs (especially prescription drugs or those for acute conditions) must be kept in a safe place, also to avoid misidentification and abuse. Check the expiry dates and dispose as needed. Donating them is an option, as in these cases the medicines often expire before we need them.
 
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