Mental Health any tips on improving self esteem?

[crunchyplanets]

I feel ugly, clingy, dramatic, like everything I say is stupid. My friends disagree with me though. I don't know if they're being nice or are serious.

I've suffered from this for a very long time. I'm constantly putting myself down, and just generally don't feel like I'm good enough. Ever.

I know this is very unhealthy to feel this way. And yes, looks don't matter, it really is what's on the inside that matters. I tell myself that, a lot. What I'm mainly worried about is that I'm afraid to say how I feel alot of times. Im afraid to speak up for myself, because I feel stupid, or like im being over dramatic. I really don't want to feel this way anymore. And if im being honest here, yes I've thought about killing myself. Alot lately. Just driving my car into a pole. I really really wont, but I hate thinking this way.

I cant afford a counselor currently. Has anyone suffered from self esteem issues, do you have any type of thinking that can help? The littlest thing might go a long way ( i hope ). Thanks for your time.

 

[paranoid android]

While most people that know me now wouldn't be able to guess i did suffer from very low self esteem through my teens up until my early 20's. For me anxiety was the major reason and once this went away i was more or less fine. I still get it occasionally but these days it's due to the depression i get which is a whole other beast altogether. The first and only good shrink i ever had did give me some good coping mechanisms though i must say. One thing to remember is just how self absorbed most people are. So what is your being whatever? Chances are they will forget you where even there 5 seconds after your gone or will be so busy playing with their Iphone they won't notice in the first place. I remember my greatest fear was passing out in a public place from a panic attack. This got so bad i would often puke from anxiety before i would go into a public place. I mentioned this to my then shrink and she said "so what if you pass out from a panic attack? The worst that will happen is that someone will call the ambulance and they will give you a shot of Lorazepam and maybe take you to hospital. You can't actually die from a panic attack". Learning to think like that literally changed my life as i no longer get social phobia at all. When i was younger the mere thought of talking to a pretty woman would send me into a panic attack and it usually took a few shots of booze and a joint for me to actually get up the courage to do so. Today this is not a problem at all as really whats the worst that can happen? She will say no which is hardly a big deal at all.

It sounds like you are over analysing things which is something that i did as well. Speaking from experience this is a killer when it comes to self esteem as you can find a fault in anything. I really don't know what advice to give as everyone is different but for me i found that the less fucks i gave the better off i was

 

[Haterse]

When you like or adore yourself all the more then things basically get to be less demanding. You won't make mountains out of molehills (or out of plain air) almost as frequently any longer. You won't drag yourself down or beat yourself up over basic slip-ups or over not coming to an immaculate and brutal standard.

 

[Mmp85]

Have you checked with your county health department or social services to see what kind of mental health services they offer? You can get low cost or even free therapy and other treatment.
If you're not sure if you're in the U.S. though but I thought it was worth mentioning. I used county mental health for about a year and was pleased with it and with my income paid about $20 for therapy sessions.

 

[paranoid android]

^ That's pretty good actually considering psychologists up here cost a fortune and are not covered by government insurance. I think you can get to see one for free if your willing to go on the waiting list but seeing as how it takes a good 2 years to even see a psychiatrist here i would say that the waiting list for a psychologist would be even longer. Thankfully the first shrink i ever saw was also a trained psychologist and to this day i would say she was the only good psychiatrist i have ever had. I had to for my own self preservation give up on psychiatrists because i came damn close to beating the complete cunt i saw there about 2 years ago into a bloody pulp. I give myself credit for not ripping his medical certificate down off the wall and making him eat the fucking thing glass frame and all.

 

[Burnt Offerings]

I don't have an easy answer for this because it's something I struggle with as well, especially being suspicious of other people and their motivations (because how could they like someone like me, right?) One trick I've learned that helps a bit is analyzing my own thought processes and applying them to other people, though...I'm not malicious and I try to look for the best in others, and I assume that for most people it's the same way. I have bad qualities but I also have some good ones, which is why some people like to associate themselves with me.