Last summer I tried shrooms, LSD, mdma and 2c-b for the first time. I was however put on a prescription tricyclic (amitriptyline) just before summer (not for depression) but stopped taking this before taking the drugs in case of interactions. My first mushroom experience was strange, not how others experienced it, as was my experience was 2c-b, very fast and confusing. LSD and mdma seemed fine. After trying 2c-b a few months after deciding to stop taking the amitriptyline it seemed fine, so I thought the strange experiences could be related to such. I was only on the amitriptyline for around 2 months on a very low dose (around 15mg daily).
It's been around 2 years since I starting smoking weed, although in the first year I used it rarely, but this progressed to very regular use, particularly last summer. However shortly after I also started having problems with weed, and I experienced a panic attack from such when I have had no previous problems with the drug at all, this led to me no longer enjoying it and eventually stopping using it all. I also started to develop symptoms of anxiety without drug use too just after the panic attack, although this definitely started to diminish when abstaining from smoking weed. I started getting worried I was going insane, feeling like my vision was going funny, feeling really uncomfortable in the dark/ at night and having social problems among other things.
Then I tried to do mdma at new year. I had done it 2 times previously, with a month's break between each and both had been absolutely amazing. However this time I kept feeling dizzy. I would get into it, then it'd suddenly drop off and I would feel dizzy. The stuff we had got wasn't anywhere as good as the first stuff, and I had taken a lower dose and felt very anxious about taking it, so thought this was why. I had done mdma 3 times at this point.
During this whole time I have had a lot of other stuff going on. I had a bad situation after my initial drug use last summer when I developed very strong feelings for the best friend of my boyfriend of 3 years. I was in a very unhappy relationship and had essentially been mentally abused by him, and I just wanted to feel loved, and he felt the same way. I broke up with my boyfriend who was going to uni and stuff happened between me and the other guy, I left it a while and told my ex who for some reason was okay with it, although to be fair he is a very weird person. I then moved in with the guy I was now with because I had really bad shit going on at home. After a while my ex then decided he hated us, despite telling me he wanted to be friends with me constantly for months, and started being really horrible to me. This really got to me and I felt anxious all the time. I've also had exams to worry about.
Anyway I decided to take a break from using drugs as I was obviously having problems with such at the time. After nearly 7 months I went to a club and I decided to do mdma. This was my first time doing it at a club. I started to feel it coming on and I felt fine, then I started to worry and I got quite bad anxiety and dizziness and didn't want to be in the club. I went outside and talked to some people and felt better, but still lingering anxiety. I took a lower dose than the first 2 times but slightly more than new year (around 100mg) and this was better stuff than the stuff I had done at new year, but I had similar negative effects to then, mostly dizziness. I'm stressed out now because I loved the drug the first two times, and got some amazing things from it. It could be because I had never done mdma at a club before and I was unfamilar with the place where it was, and I had just finished my exams on the same day so had been stressed.
Overall I feel like this might be an anxiety issue, although I do just feel generally confused. I feel like I may have had some anxiety issue that has been brought out by drug use, or maybe low serotonin levels. I decided to go vegan after my original use of mdma and I have read most sources of food containing l tryptophan are animal sources, so my body may have had difficulty restoring my serotonin levels which may be having an affect. Any ideas and help would be appreciated as I am very confused at the moment.
It's been around 2 years since I starting smoking weed, although in the first year I used it rarely, but this progressed to very regular use, particularly last summer. However shortly after I also started having problems with weed, and I experienced a panic attack from such when I have had no previous problems with the drug at all, this led to me no longer enjoying it and eventually stopping using it all. I also started to develop symptoms of anxiety without drug use too just after the panic attack, although this definitely started to diminish when abstaining from smoking weed. I started getting worried I was going insane, feeling like my vision was going funny, feeling really uncomfortable in the dark/ at night and having social problems among other things.
Then I tried to do mdma at new year. I had done it 2 times previously, with a month's break between each and both had been absolutely amazing. However this time I kept feeling dizzy. I would get into it, then it'd suddenly drop off and I would feel dizzy. The stuff we had got wasn't anywhere as good as the first stuff, and I had taken a lower dose and felt very anxious about taking it, so thought this was why. I had done mdma 3 times at this point.
During this whole time I have had a lot of other stuff going on. I had a bad situation after my initial drug use last summer when I developed very strong feelings for the best friend of my boyfriend of 3 years. I was in a very unhappy relationship and had essentially been mentally abused by him, and I just wanted to feel loved, and he felt the same way. I broke up with my boyfriend who was going to uni and stuff happened between me and the other guy, I left it a while and told my ex who for some reason was okay with it, although to be fair he is a very weird person. I then moved in with the guy I was now with because I had really bad shit going on at home. After a while my ex then decided he hated us, despite telling me he wanted to be friends with me constantly for months, and started being really horrible to me. This really got to me and I felt anxious all the time. I've also had exams to worry about.
Anyway I decided to take a break from using drugs as I was obviously having problems with such at the time. After nearly 7 months I went to a club and I decided to do mdma. This was my first time doing it at a club. I started to feel it coming on and I felt fine, then I started to worry and I got quite bad anxiety and dizziness and didn't want to be in the club. I went outside and talked to some people and felt better, but still lingering anxiety. I took a lower dose than the first 2 times but slightly more than new year (around 100mg) and this was better stuff than the stuff I had done at new year, but I had similar negative effects to then, mostly dizziness. I'm stressed out now because I loved the drug the first two times, and got some amazing things from it. It could be because I had never done mdma at a club before and I was unfamilar with the place where it was, and I had just finished my exams on the same day so had been stressed.
Overall I feel like this might be an anxiety issue, although I do just feel generally confused. I feel like I may have had some anxiety issue that has been brought out by drug use, or maybe low serotonin levels. I decided to go vegan after my original use of mdma and I have read most sources of food containing l tryptophan are animal sources, so my body may have had difficulty restoring my serotonin levels which may be having an affect. Any ideas and help would be appreciated as I am very confused at the moment.
