Mental Health A question on therapy

[Mjo95jr]

Hey guys, I haven't posted in a while and feel like I am very much in need of doing so.

My question is does therapy really help?

More specifically, I feel it doesn't help me and if anything I'm uncomfortable and drawn back into myself when ever I've gone. I resent going, and even if others and a therapist see progress, it's just me lying to them so I can get out of therapy.

My therapist (or former, whatever it is) emailed me to ask if I wanted to meet again or not. I have left her with the impression I am getting/ gotten to a good spot mentally and I don't know how to go about this. As a side note: I was feeling fine for the last few months but these last 3 weeks have been slowly degrading me.

 

[iridescentblack]

Honestly, looking back, I only really see my therapist as someone I've been able to talk to when times were hard. It was therapeutic in that we were able to discuss a wide range of things, but it was just talking.

I had a psychologist on the other hand while I was a patient at a local mental hospital and this guy was good. We talked on an entirely different level of conversation. Then again, this psychologist was a "man of knowledge", so that's why the sessions were so helpful.

In other words, therapy with a guy in a nice shirt and a degree in therapy is just talking. Therapy with someone with experience and knowledge and wisdom is totally different. Those are far and few between, though. Finding them is like finding a needle in a haystack.

 

[llama112]

I've been thinking about this for a while now. I've seen four therapists in the past few years. I've liked three of them. They listen, we think about what caused the issues, etc. But I don't see a ton of progress. Maybe small coping mechanisms. I don't lie to them, I go by my own choice (not forced to for any reason), I keep hoping that someone will help. I just don't see a lot of help. They can't just SOLVE the issue.

(note: I go for anxiety and panic attacks)

 

[sliceofcake]

Have you ever gone to a cognitive behavioral therapist?

That type of therapy is different than what we think of as traditional talk therapy.

I have experience with two different cbt docs- they both held PhDs in their fields and they suggested some interesting tools. You might look into CBT as a next step? Unfortunately they are not as plentiful as the other type of therapist so you don't get as many choices in who you see unless you can travel.

The other difference that I recall is that there are actual assignments that need to be completed between sessions. I also felt like they were both more of mechanics than sympathizers. So that's rough going in.

 

[Ligaturd]

That's the thing. Knowledge is power but without action you are pretty much just jerking yourself off. The change has to come from within, you can acknowledge all these past traumas or whatever the case may be but you have to actually "let go" of these things.

Therapy is useful but it doesn't mean anything if you are still being avoidant inside and putting up a front, saying the things you think they want to hear to get a pat on the head. It has to come from your heart, you have to truly want change and it sounds counter intuitive but many people seem to want to hold on to their mental and emotional afflictions or traumas, sometimes it justifies negative behaviors and drug addiction. I know from experience that wallowing in self pity and despair can become romanticized, a sort of sadomasochistic pleasure can be derived from it and justify shitty self destructive behaviors and negative behaviors towards others. Cognitive behavioral therapy, (probably a complete bastardization of the true definition.) which I understand to be a useful therapy through exposing oneself to various situations one would usually tend to avoid as it triggers an intense psychological response. It is incredibly useful being able to go through the motions and experience being able to see that the irrational fears that keep us from living life are exactly that, irrational. New associations are built and we have that to refer to instead of the trauma which creates this intense flight or fight response that can dominate peoples lives. It doesn't even need to be from trauma either but the process of becoming objectively aware of how we work, why we function in that manner allows us to have the power to change but you actually have to put in the work to start instilling that change. Consciously approaching things differently, avoiding the factors that lead to those negative behaviors but more importantly pushing yourself to experience things in a different way or to do things that you were irrationally afraod of before and instilling confidence through experience. Kind of ranting there. Hopefully that makes some sense, I still don't have my shit together. I've been waiting 4 months to get in to see a psychologist but at this rate I wont need one as I will have learned to cope with my problems before then lol.

 

[SixBuckets]

Therapy has never been useful to me, but I don't believe I have the kind of problems that talk therapy/cognitive training can help with.

 

[cj]

I find it useful but its not magic.