Blame it on day two of a messy attempt to taper but I have to add a word about cis or cishet as you call it - a term your gen invented. Gender dysphoria is not a new phenomenon and probably experienced by everyone during puberty. In my case had you asked me anytime between 10 and 20 yo I'd have told you with a passion that I hated my painful useless ugly and disturbing breasts that I never ordered in the first place and wanted them removed until probably my thirtes. Just that during that time there simply was no option to adjust your body to your wishes. Glad it wasn't cause otherwise I would never have had the chance to feed my own kids, which IS absolutely a precious experience. So by now I have no issues with them despite losing any optical attractivity they may ever have had. I just accepted them finally. The other thing is that I always have and still do hate the female role (!). Or why on earth does having a tail grant so many freedoms over those who don't?! I would have 100% preferred being a boy just for that and being stronger.
Generally I don't believe in a male or female soul or mind. Mind is beyond those differences and always has both elements. Imo.
I cooled down a bit when I changed my beliefs and I am pretty convinced that I was male and female countless lives before and this one is just my home for a few decades more if I have that much left... So why bother?
If I had any say in these things I would abolish all those labels aside the biological ones. If you wanna hear a "Miss" today, dress like one. If you wanna hear a "Sir" tomorrow, dress like one. That would be freedom for me rather than a whole set of new complicated labels making it difficult to address anyone at all
(at least in German the new gender police has absolutely violated the language)
My mother had this similar experience, she was born in '62 in rural South Florida, which is a VERY rough time to be in a VERY rough place. It was arguably safer in the majority of Mexico and the Middle East at that time, than the specific area she was in. She's half Romani (most white people still use the slur 'gypsy' when talking about us, but have never even heard the name of our people, Romani, before) so when the race riots happened, she was getting fire hosed with the other brown people, and the black people. She however has green eyes (oddly enough, with a gold/yellow ring around them?) so her nickname was "Devil Eyes", which I still think would be a kickass name for a metal band. Up until she was married off and impregnated at the age of 14 because Romani people have a culture that hasn't really been updated since the 1850's in that regard, she told everybody that she was a boy stuck in a girl's body, that her name was actually Toby, not [redacted for personal safety, but insert generic female name here], and she couldn't understand why she was put in the wrong body. Upon becoming pregnant at 14 and having my older sister at 15, she just had to lock the fuck in and handle business, raising her children, working enough to get by while in states of poverty I find even homeless people in Portland Maine don't experience. Homeless for years before the age of 14, literally sleeping in trees and shit. That's all on top of a variety of sadistically abusive people in her life as a child.
She continues to respect trans people, use the pronouns they ask for, etc., and is now kind of reluctantly settled into femininity.
The etymology of the word cisgender is pretty new, it dates back to 1994, Defosse in a usenet group coined the term as a logical way to talk about the inverse of "trans", if you've ever looked into chemistry and noticed this concept called "cis-trans isomerism", that's another incidence of the same thing being used, where the antonym of 'trans' is 'cis', so what do you call someone who's on the opposite of the spectrum from transgender? Normalgendered? Nottrans? Cisgender seems like the logical term to use, just from my perspective as a native anglophone with a super deep obsession with linguistics.
I highly sympathize with your stance of being anti-labelling, and I do my best to embody it myslef, but there are some certain practical points where it helps in my opinion. Especially when discussing among other queer folks to be able to communicate concepts surrounding queerness with words well established in literature and which make sense. An example would be things like a trans woman saying something like "Cisgender heterosexual men aren't really what I'm looking for, I'm more comfortable with other trans people", such as people who look for t4t (trans-for-trans) relationships.
I personally think that neo-pronouns, things like "xe/xer" instead of "they/them" are goofy, terrible optics for the queer community, and lack a complete understanding of linguistic evolution. I suspect that the path to queerness being more secure in the future is going to come from two things, firstly a normalization of queer people as being just as normal as cisgender hetersexuals (the term cishet abbreviates). I suspect that the second part of it will come from being adequately militarized, here in the US the people who want us dead and forgotten about have been arming themselves for much longer, and there's this culture of gen z queers that are just these soft, dainty, conflict-avoidant people who I can only describe as weak. If, as a queer person capable of physical combat (aka not AFAB), and you haven't been knocking the teeth out of homophobes' mouths for years, you've been inadequately protecting your community in my opinion. The point is not to make people hate queer folks, it's to send the message of "This shit is not welcome in our community, and here is what happens when you do bring it in". Where I grew up, a kid was beaten almost to death and then thrown off a bridge to drown. Nowadays, some redneck used a homophobic slur referring to some random art student kid and lost 3+ teeth over it within 12 hours, because half of the violent gangbanger types in my school were also queer, and frankly they all had guns and police batons and no fear of using them. Without adequate protection, no community will survive, as all will be targeted by fascists eventually, it's the classic "first they came for the Jews and we did nothing, then they came for the communists and we did nothing" sort of deal. Vigilante justice is almost always a bad idea in a stable society, but here in the USA, we've long lost that stability in my opinion. Maybe it was just where I grew up in Maine, idk.
Sorry about the rant, I'm just huge on historical linguistics and the arming/training of the queer community.
Edit: Wanted to say, I agree with you
@Mushoku_Sensei , just felt like articulating a bunch on this as a queer zoomer who has spent a ton of time doing my best to understand the lived experiences of others, and who also has a deep obsession with linguistics and the way that linguistics and society interface with one another.
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not bad from a 40 a day habit.
