Drug suggestions for suicidal people

[Zim97]

Hey I've been extremely depressed and have these terrible thoughts every single day since I was 15 (I'm 21 now) and I was wondering what do you guys suggest could help me get rid of these thoughts I hate ssris so don't post about those but I've found benzos and seroquel to be help but my doctor is a shit head and swears prozac will help me(it makes it worse) so can you guys please help I really really need it i can't deal with this anymore thanks -Zim

 

[Jeanpauldash]

Paxil
Mushrooms
Klonopin
A new environment
Any benzo
Blends of sativa indica
Indica
Ambien
Lunesta

 

[endlessnameless]

I cant in good conscience advise you to buy/begin using illegal drugs. Indeed we dont know eachother but that doesnt change a thing in my mind; I pride myself upon my compassionate nature in a seemingly uncompassionate modern society and dont want you to do yourself harm.

However I can explain to you from first hand experience what helped me (in moderation and for a temporary time) when I was your age and was sincerely considering suicide due to my TRD (Treatment Resistant Depression) diagnosis. Upon receiving that I knew psychiatric medication - the likes listed within the endless litany of SSRIs, NDRIs, SNRIs, SNDRIs (etc, etc...etc) I felt I'd never achieve success with the ilk, as for 10 years prior I didnt and I was at my wits end with feeling like a guinea pig (gaining weight so fast I developed stretch marks, forgetting peoples faces, names, not being able to string a sentence together, lacking any vestige of my former personality, too lethargic speak, too drained of energy shower, listeless...I'm sure you know exactly what I mean).

Anyway, first thing that brought me out of myself in terms of substance, was Benzodiazepines - namely Diazepam. It enabled me to actually realise that what I thought was a serious depressive disorder was in fact a serious anxiety disorder (I'll be seeking counselling for that in the new year actually).

The other thing was any kind of opiate. I'm not talking shooting up heroin, because that always had the potential to kill me and I didnt want to kill myself, I just wanted to live. I did smoke heroin for a time however, which (candidly enough) was remarkably effective but ultimately that choice will lead you down a path of using just to stave away withdrawals (and if you think your depression is bad now, that'll show you just how far the rabbit hole of depression goes).

15 eh? It was 14 with me. Couldnt legally get prescribed psych meds in Ireland until 18 so had to grin and bare it until then, and until then I wasnt grinning very much as I was (in retrospect) performing a kind of self harm upon myself my neglecting my dental hygine so that my family might listen to my cries for help as regards to my legitimate depression but I just...dont think they could wrap their heads around it at all and so I was left to my own devices for the most part.

You've had success with Seroquel?
Could you tell me about your experience with that please?
The typical 9/10 month wait for psych meds to kick in consumed so much of my life that I just couldnt afford to potentially waste any more of my prime on them.
Cymbalta worked for about a fortnight.

If you have any questions for me I'd be happy to answer.

 

[Zim97]

I really appreciate you writing me back you seem like a good person and I understand what you mean when you say it took benzos to realize your depressive disorder was moreso a very bad anxiety problem because I think that's my case too my anxiety is what makes me so upset and sad all the time because I cant talk to anyone without having extreme panic so when I took a xan for the first time it was like heaven so I think I need to talk to a different doctor because it really helps me too but anyway the seroquel experience was basically just I went to my friends house whose mom had a bunch of 100mgs so he gave me 1 and we went to the club that night and I felt great it didn't make me tired but felt like I was drunk mixed with a benzo with something else idk what but was amazing I could act like a normal person but don't ever do 200 or over it made me hear weird shit like people talking to me who weren't there it was scary as fk but fun is recommend it

 

[Zim97]

Ill look into those thankyou

 

[Mafioso]

Taking drugs might change the way you feel momentarily for the better, but that is just on the ride up. Usually there is a backlash once the drugs wear off. You're left worse off than when you started. If you want to truly change the way you feel you have to deal with the root of the issue. What sort of self-talk, thoughts, world views and self views, beliefs, past events, relationships, and so on is creating these feelings?? What types of things make you think about suicide, or feel that life is not worth living? You say specifically every day since you were 15.. what was happening when you were 13, 14 and 15 that led up to you feeling this way? Maybe even further back.

We can't change the past, but we can change how we feel about it. We can learn to cope and deal with problems in productive and healthy ways. Things don't have to remain hopeless forever even though it feels like it will.

By coping with something as serious as suicidal thoughts with drugs, you are starting down a very painful and possibly deadly path. A lot of people start off down it with similar reckless abandon only to find out things can always get worse..

 

[hpu357]

Hi Zim, hope you feel better. SSRI's don't work in my experience Prozac made me a more anxious person when I was 16. I'm 20 now, weed helps best for me.

Legal drugs: Kratom is a good high. Etizolam, sold as a cheap research chemical (it feels about same as xans). And Salvia 40x or 80x

Other feel goods are uppers: Vyvanse, Focalin, Ritalin

Opiates: suboxone, perks

Benzos: Diazepam, kpins

gl wish all the best.

 

[aihfl]

I'm closing this. It's heading toward sourcing and not particularly appropriate for TDS.