Toreadores
Greenlighter
- Joined
- Nov 24, 2015
- Messages
- 36
Hey guys before I begin I know there are other threads about similar topics in the forum and I read some of them, but I need help for my specific case so that's why I made a new thread. So here is my story.
I am addicted mostly to Oxycodone, but also to morphine for 5 years. As most of the people, my addiction began as medical condition. 5 years ago I was in severe car accident and I spent 3 months with 7 surgeries in hospital and almost a year of physical rehabilitation and therapy after that. So in my case treating pain with opiods was inevitable. However after the first 2 years I got better. I will always have chronic pain in certain areas but I think I will be able to manage with lesser painkillers. But as most of you knows once you've been on narcotics even for few months you get addicted and since my case was pretty severe I had no problem getting pills from doctors, but doctors give certain amount. And my tolerance reached such high levels that I am taking 300-350mg oxycodone a day. I am literally eating my monthly prescriptions for 10-12 days and between prescriptions I take morphine pills that I get from the street. For long time I wanted to quit but every time it was so hard and painful that I just get back to it in less than 2 days. My life became a disaster, I give almost all of my money for pills. Few times I ran out both on oxys and morphs for couple of days (which felt like 2 weeks) and the withdraws during that time was the most horrible experience in my life, even worse than my accident. I assume you are familiar with the feeling. Lately I am having trouble finding more pills, the guy who was giving me the morphs stopped receiving them and I just thought that it's time to stop this torture and get my life together. With my last oxycodone prescription and with a lot of Kratom I was able to reduce the dosage, it was hard but I did it. For the last 1 week I was taking 30-40mg oxy a day with probably 30 grams of Kratom. I ran out of oxys 2 days ago I am taking Kratom only, so far it is relatively ok, not perfect, but at least I am managing. I want to know if somebody went thru similar experience with high dosage of oxys and got clean. I am no fool, I know the path to full recovery is long and hard, but still does anybody know how long it takes for the withdraws to disappear or at least be minimum. Kratom is ok but because of the recent FDA bulshit they try to make it illegal, even my main vendors stopped selling it and it become harder to get. That's why I want to get clean as soon as possible. I can't even remember what it is to feel normal. Am I going to feel normal ever again? Or once you taste the drugs there will never be "normal" again? I am afraid that even when it gets better, there will always be a hole in me that won't be able to feel normal or happy ever again. I just want to prepare myself.
I am addicted mostly to Oxycodone, but also to morphine for 5 years. As most of the people, my addiction began as medical condition. 5 years ago I was in severe car accident and I spent 3 months with 7 surgeries in hospital and almost a year of physical rehabilitation and therapy after that. So in my case treating pain with opiods was inevitable. However after the first 2 years I got better. I will always have chronic pain in certain areas but I think I will be able to manage with lesser painkillers. But as most of you knows once you've been on narcotics even for few months you get addicted and since my case was pretty severe I had no problem getting pills from doctors, but doctors give certain amount. And my tolerance reached such high levels that I am taking 300-350mg oxycodone a day. I am literally eating my monthly prescriptions for 10-12 days and between prescriptions I take morphine pills that I get from the street. For long time I wanted to quit but every time it was so hard and painful that I just get back to it in less than 2 days. My life became a disaster, I give almost all of my money for pills. Few times I ran out both on oxys and morphs for couple of days (which felt like 2 weeks) and the withdraws during that time was the most horrible experience in my life, even worse than my accident. I assume you are familiar with the feeling. Lately I am having trouble finding more pills, the guy who was giving me the morphs stopped receiving them and I just thought that it's time to stop this torture and get my life together. With my last oxycodone prescription and with a lot of Kratom I was able to reduce the dosage, it was hard but I did it. For the last 1 week I was taking 30-40mg oxy a day with probably 30 grams of Kratom. I ran out of oxys 2 days ago I am taking Kratom only, so far it is relatively ok, not perfect, but at least I am managing. I want to know if somebody went thru similar experience with high dosage of oxys and got clean. I am no fool, I know the path to full recovery is long and hard, but still does anybody know how long it takes for the withdraws to disappear or at least be minimum. Kratom is ok but because of the recent FDA bulshit they try to make it illegal, even my main vendors stopped selling it and it become harder to get. That's why I want to get clean as soon as possible. I can't even remember what it is to feel normal. Am I going to feel normal ever again? Or once you taste the drugs there will never be "normal" again? I am afraid that even when it gets better, there will always be a hole in me that won't be able to feel normal or happy ever again. I just want to prepare myself.