Relapsed today

[StarMedic552]

I had barely seen a sober day since 2010. This past march my substance use habit got me fired from my hospital job (took Nubain from my employer; only reason I wasn't arrested is Nubian isn't a controlled substance). Wife took my son and left me and came back two weeks later and said "get help. I forgive you and I'll help you but I'm not going through this again." Well, I'd been sober ever since but I screwed it up today with OC. I feel like total shit. She doesn't know I did it.

Just needed to vent.

 

[Stargazer]

Hi Star!

I understand how shitty you feel. Know there's a difference between a lapse and a relapse.

You've had a lapse in judgement today. It doesn't have to turn into a full-blown relapse because of this.

 

[EPL1]

Hello star,

I agree with 10.

This is just a blip on your radar, no harm done, just keep moving on now. Don't look back.

We are all here to help and support you too. So proud of you for dealing with this slip up, you will be just fine.

Hugs,
your friend,
Ash.

I had barely seen a sober day since 2010. This past march my substance use habit got me fired from my hospital job (took Nubain from my employer; only reason I wasn't arrested is Nubian isn't a controlled substance). Wife took my son and left me and came back two weeks later and said "get help. I forgive you and I'll help you but I'm not going through this again." Well, I'd been sober ever since but I screwed it up today with OC. I feel like total shit. She doesn't know I did it.

Just needed to vent.

 

[StarMedic552]

My experience helps me be compassionate toward my patients on the ambulance who struggle. But I hate struggling myself.

 

[StarMedic552]

But I had 4 more OC that I was planning on taking and I flushed them down the toilet bc I can't do this again. So maybe it is just a lapse in judgment as opposed to a full relapse.

 

[jasperkent]

Wow! I'm impressed that you flushed The "extra" 4. Not sure I could have done that. Don't beat yourself up-- just get back in the saddle. Lapsing isn't failure. Relapsing isn't failure. Failure is giving up completely.

Hang in there.

Peace&Love,
jasper


​"Accept who you are. Unless you're a serial killer." -- Ellen DeGeneres

 

[EPL1]

I agree with Jasper,

So proud of you for flushing those, and yes absolutely Star!! This is a just a momentary lapse of judgment. No harm done, just move on.

We are all here for you,
pm me anytime,
your friend,
Ash.

 

[sonicwhite]

I would suggest you tell her.

Be honest and open. She said she?ll help you.

When you?re honest she will understand that you?re not hiding anything and that you feel terrible about it.


I understand thinking. Well she will leave. The TRUTH will set you free.

 

[cj]

It's just a slip up. It may end up being a good thing in the long run. Examine what led to you using and try to fix it

 

[Jabberwocky]

I've slipped up more times than I care to imagine, but each time I learn from it and do much better. Hang in there, my friend.