Just popped 6 chlormethiazole (heminevrin) capsules, and 6-7x10mg oxycodone IR caps,plugged the latter. Just lazing around to watch star trek, TOS then enterprise, then 'andromeda',a sci-fi series done By the same writer as was responsible for trek.
Did have only a bare handful of chlormethiazole caps left, but picked up a 'rescue pack' script just moments ago, went out during TOS, since its an episode I've seen before, the one where Kirk gets accelerated to crazy speeds by the Scalosian race. Instead of picking it up right away, I went straight back home, as I already have 2 capsules of heminevrin left, and the rescue pack script is much much bigger, as always, than I actually need, for a full 21 caps, I'll not need it during the time it takes for Enterprise and Andromeda to be on and finish, as I've just said 'fuckitall' and took a solid recreational dose, with 2 caps left of my regular script anyway, I'll be going soon to pick them up, and gave me a nice chance to take a sound recreational hit of chlormethiazole.
Not that I'd have had much if any problem,as I seem, when my regular use of chlormethiazole is at either baseline or increased dosages, to weirdly as hell for a GABAa agonist of barbiturate-like character, not to have developed ANY physical dependency,or even tolerance, at least, not enough to require increasing the dose, a little, just enough that I can take it alongside my pain meds, and alongside the infinite and automatically refilled 10mg/d (as 2 5mg moggies) nitrazepam script (I use higher doses by quite a lot, just a couple of days a week, as and when needed. Ages back I asked for a script of nitrazepam at 10mg daily, for a very specific length of time, because of some events, life-wise that I wanted nothing to do with but that were outside my ability to control; the length was known to me beforehand, so I told them to give me a moggy script for that length of time, then when it was for certain, over, to allow me to do my planned taper)...
Saw the GP initially weekly to get a refill, but they just decided eventually, and after only a few appointments, it seems, to free up appointment slots for others and just stuck it on my med sheets with the refills that get done automatically, like say, clonidine, or the muscle relaxant, tizanidine; that I take to deal with the otherwise permanent and unceasing stiffness severe muscle spasm in my leg due to nerve damage, along with my pain and antiseizure meds.
Literally, just went 'sod it, we will make it easier on ourselves by not having to see him every week or month, we'll just put it on repeat and let him keep it for as long as he feels like, this heavy duty long acting BZD'. I've had the script for years now, maybe 5 years or more and they just keep giving me the moggies.
How fucking STUPID of a doctor is THAT? to just leave a patient with that sort of a dose of nitrazepam, telling them to take it twice a day, every day?
My own personally assigned GP does know that I know a fair lot about biochemistry, toxicology and pharmacology, medicine and many related disciplines,indeed, he has said himself that I know a lot more than he does about them, still, if I were almost any other patient that would be putting me in quite a lot of danger, and of a most unpleasant sort, would it not? negligently, even?
(no, I don't intend to sue them, not at all. Rather, given most doctors are so stingy they make people beg on their god-damned knees for each and every miligram of as weak a load of crap as chlordiazepoxide, or diazepam, given they aren't trying to stop me, or saying anything about it, I doubt they even remember in fact; and that benzos are a precious and hard to obtain resource, and that the syntheses are rather complicated and involved, multi step affairs generally, and besides, I don't really WANT 100s of grams of nitrazepam (although I'd go for nimetazepam, flunitrazepam and flunimetazepam if I ever do go for a synth of a classic benzo (meaning a 1,4-benzodiazepine with GABAa receptor positive allosteric modulator activity, your sedative-hypnotic, muscle relaxant and anticonvulsant, anxiolytic benzo-1,4-diazepines, rather than other other configurations of the benzodiazepine ring that act on things like AMPA receptors as antagonists/negative allosteric modulators, dopamine reuptake inhibitors, neuropeptidergics and other funky shit you don't expect when you think of as 'a benzo' etc.)
Haha (posted later at almost 12:20)
Just as well I do have that extra two, because I ended up totally wasted. Tried to make a honey sandwich. Made one. Went to make another and kept wondering where the honey was. I had it in my hand it turns out, and ended up having to scrape it up off the bread board with the bread, because I was so absolutely RATSPHINCTERED, that I'd taken the cap off the honey bottle and had it upturned, going all over the fucking chopping board.
Couldn't scrape it up with a knife to use it of course, because this board, its all plastic, and it has this HIDEOUS surface texture, all finely grainy and uggh..I can't even stand to touch it without gloves. Total sensory nightmare.
Wish I could have licked the unused honey that the bread didn't get off of the board, but it was wasted, because there is no way I could put my mouth on that and get that texture on my mouth, I'll even put disposable surgical gloves on before picking it up with my hands. And if someone is washing it,jesus god, fingers in ears, run the fuck out of the room at top speed as if the one washing up had just told me they farted phosgene and then let rip with an earthshaker.
Should have been working today, but the above is kinda my calling in...well not sick, but I did just wake up from being so far bastardlyshyted off that heavy dose of chlormethiazole that until it has totally worn off and I have to take my regular medical dose again. And I've got those two caps spare, and can go pick up the rescue pack in the morning tomorrow, probably grab another bottle of the linctus while I'm at it from the same pharmacy (BEFORE I hand over the script for the chlormethiazole of course, although this place seems happy to sell me a bottle a day, and go by whatever the bare minimum legal restrictions are, even knowing I'm on morphine, oxy, nitrazepam, chlormethiazole, tizanidine, clonidine, pramipexole, and a few other things besides), I'll get me the bottle first then hand over the chlormethiazole script.
Just had a 300mg shot of morphine too, while I watch family guy/american dad and have a few beers. Nice glow just showing the first signs of coming on after the IM morphine, although going to wait with a beer until it hits fully, so I can appreciate the cigar better when I light up my post-shot smoke.
Anyone else find that after shooting up opioids, that they just HHAAAVVVEE to have a smoke afterwards? and that an E-fag doesn't work the same in that it doesn't satisfy enough in the same way? it has to be real cancer-bush sticks of some sort.Guessing because of the traces of MAOIs and other trace alkaloids in tobacco. But nicotine alone, from an E-fag (say, where ARE spade and his mom these days?) Nothing happened to him I hope? or is he just off IRL somewhere, shagging passing dogs again?
)) that's why I still take it even as I have morphine and oxy sources
