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Creativity loss in recovery

foxlight

Greenlighter
Joined
Aug 31, 2015
Messages
6
Being an addict, I've created way too many "reasons" why I don't want to quit using... usually they are fear based or my being lazy towards putting in the work. However, this particular question is the one that still has me hanging onto my debilitating and hated narcotics habit... what's ganna happen to my creativity, and the motivation to even BE creative??? I know at first, alot is going to change, but can anyone with good, honest clean time tell me if that will resurface?
 
Once you make it past the acute withdrawals it will start to come back. It takes more effort to actually pick up an instrument for me, but it is much easier to get immersed in the instrument. At first and in very low dose, things like opioids or cocaine might give you a little creative edge, but basically once it becomes habitual it becomes stifling and limiting.

I always used to argue with myself that some of the greatest guitarist were heavy drug users, like SRV and jimi Hendrix. And those were just the famous people that I knew about so it almost seemed certain that anyone who was good used something. And if you are counting weed and alcohol- to some degree that is true. Almost entirely true if you count caffeine and nicotine. Even still, there are also greats that claim to never have used any drug or drank any alcohol. Whether I choose to believe them or not, I know there are some out there that don't use any substances to enhance their creativity and who are also extremely talented and creative.

The big difference that I notice for myself is that I don't feel creative unless I have been practicing, where as I would feel creative any time I took the right combo before.


Basically, I am trying to say that I think that people are creative in spite of their bad habits like drug use, not because of it. To be good, you still have to practice whether or not you use drugs.
 
It's about replacing the drugs with other things that light your fire. I mean if you get off drugs but don't change your life, and you're bored all the time or whatever, you probably won't feel creative. For me, creativity is about inspiration, and inspiration happens when you're doing things that inspire you.

But for sure, during acute withdrawals and maybe for a bit after, you're going to feel bad, and uninspired. But stick with it and it'll come back.
 
I wish I knew how to respond to everyone personally, I haven't figured that out yet.
Thank yall for responding!
I feel like alot of my inspiration came from the drugs. I felt more immersed in what I was doing, very happy about it on top of that. I should add this mostly comes from the uppers that I do in the form of ADD meds. I don't want to lose the inspiration, I know the talent is there, but I'm so afraid I'll give it all up giving up the drugs.
Xorkoth, do you have something now that lights your fire other than drugs?
 
Maybe for a little while, but then again.

Everything's a give and take, but your not going to lose the inspiration.

Amps do not give people inspiration. Compulsive drive yes, but in my humble opinion inspiration no.

What are you all looking to give up?
 
Xorkoth, do you have something now that lights your fire other than drugs?

Yes I do. Primarily playing music, also going to see music, and spending time in nature (I live in the mountains in a temperate rainforest and I spend a lot of time exploring mountain rivers and other cool things, and camping).
 
Maybe for a little
while, but then again.

Everything's a give and take, but your not going to lose the inspiration.

Amps do not give people inspiration. Compulsive drive yes, but in my humble opinion inspiration no.

What are you all looking to give up?
As far as substances, or...??
 
Once you make it past the acute withdrawals it will start to come back. It takes more effort to actually pick up an instrument for me, but it is much easier to get immersed in the instrument. At first and in very low dose, things like opioids or cocaine might give you a little creative edge, but basically once it becomes habitual it becomes stifling and limiting.

I always used to argue with myself that some of the greatest guitarist were heavy drug users, like SRV and jimi Hendrix. And those were just the famous people that I knew about so it almost seemed certain that anyone who was good used something. And if you are counting weed and alcohol- to some degree that is true. Almost entirely true if you count caffeine and nicotine. Even still, there are also greats that claim to never have used any drug or drank any alcohol. Whether I choose to believe them or not, I know there are some out there that don't use any substances to enhance their creativity and who are also extremely talented and creative.

The big difference that I notice for myself is that I don't feel creative unless I have been practicing, where as I would feel creative any time I took the right combo before.


Basically, I am trying to say that I think that people are creative in spite of their bad habits like drug use, not because of it. To be good, you still have to practice whether or not you use drugs.
It's funny you mention these great musicians. They are one of the excuses I use to continue my substance abuse..."well, Steven Tyler, look at how brilliant he was while using...etc"..
Then again, on the other, I think, "well, Bob Ross NEVER used, and he flipping ROCKS!"...
The struggle is real...??
 
I am a big believer in going deep into whatever loss I experience. There is usually some surprising stuff to be found. After my son died of an overdose, I lost any drive to create art. Mind you, I made my meager living from it. It was a huge part of my identity, from my earliest memories. I found out this is a pretty common experience within the grief of losing a child. In fact it was the mother of one of my art students that died who warned me it may happen (it already had). I chose to really explore why and how I could not connect. Granted, this may be somewhat different because no substance was involved but I still think the process may be relevant. What I found was that there were other ways I was creating (lots of writing, lots of dream-work, lots of time spacing out and letting my self recalibrate). I developed a lot of patience and acceptance in this process and that spilled over into other areas of my life. Patience and acceptance are very good traits to cultivate in recovery.

I would try to refocus from "what I have lost" to "what I am learning about myself and my life right now". Because the former feels desperately sad and disorienting--a true loss--whereas the latter reframes it as something that is demanding all your creativity and attention for the time being only. let the future unfold as you strengthen yourself emotionally and psychologically--this can only be good for your art form.<3
 
I am a big believer in going deep into whatever loss I experience. There is usually some surprising stuff to be found. After my son died of an overdose, I lost any drive to create art. Mind you, I made my meager living from it. It was a huge part of my identity, from my earliest memories. I found out this is a pretty common experience within the grief of losing a child. In fact it was the mother of one of my art students that died who warned me it may happen (it already had). I chose to really explore why and how I could not connect. Granted, this may be somewhat different because no substance was involved but I still think the process may be relevant. What I found was that there were other ways I was creating (lots of writing, lots of dream-work, lots of time spacing out and letting my self recalibrate). I developed a lot of patience and acceptance in this process and that spilled over into other areas of my life. Patience and acceptance are very good traits to cultivate in recovery.

I would try to refocus from "what I have lost" to "what I am learning about myself and my life right now". Because the former feels desperately sad and disorienting--a true loss--whereas the latter reframes it as something that is demanding all your creativity and attention for the time being only. let the future unfold as you strengthen yourself emotionally and psychologically--this can only be good for your art form.<3
I am so incredibly sorry for your loss.
What you said resonated with me more than anything I've ever been told before.
THANK you!!!
 
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