How did you get clean?

[Jabberwocky]

I think I am now fixed on permanently giving up after my last suicide attempt.

I've now gone almost 3 weeks without booze and cigarettes and almost 4 weeks for Cocaine.

I've seen psych's already the last 20 years and some of my maturity has kicked in. I.e. it has made me realise who I am and what I can and cannot do.

I will always be an addict that I accepted before but never wanted to work with properly. I am now happy to say that yes I am an addict but no it doesn't mean I need to drink 18 bottles of beer a night, then steal money off my parents etc...

Well let's see how long this lasts any how. It is my first time in so many years like maybe fuck 10 years where I have gone without smoking or drinking at the same time. And it was always the alcohol and smoking that was the hardest to give up. The meth, coke and gambling were always easier to go without.

 

[SoCal424]

Hi noonoo-

Have you tried Nicoderm (the patch) for smoking? It could ease your withdrawal symptoms. I smoked for 5 years when I was younger and I quit cold turkey myself (before the patch came out). It took me about a month to feel better - and another two months to get past the psychological addiction. If you make it that far, I'm betting you'll feel so much better.

There are many former alcoholics in the world. I have two close relatives that were alcoholics long term, but both stopped and got through it. If you don't feel like you can stay off it, but you really want to get clean of it, have you thought about asking your doctor for antabuse? Is that an option for you?

It's a good time to make this new start for yourself. Try hard to not look back, but instead look forward to a future where you don't give a though to those habits. You can do anything you want to do. Believe in yourself and in your power to change your life for better!

Don't let yesterday take up too much of today as the best way to get ready for tomorrow is what you are doing today.
Your BL friend,
Dale

 

[Jabberwocky]

Hi noonoo-

Have you tried Nicoderm (the patch) for smoking? It could ease your withdrawal symptoms. I smoked for 5 years when I was younger and I quit cold turkey myself (before the patch came out). It took me about a month to feel better - and another two months to get past the psychological addiction. If you make it that far, I'm betting you'll feel so much better.

There are many former alcoholics in the world. I have two close relatives that were alcoholics long term, but both stopped and got through it. If you don't feel like you can stay off it, but you really want to get clean of it, have you thought about asking your doctor for antabuse? Is that an option for you?

It's a good time to make this new start for yourself. Try hard to not look back, but instead look forward to a future where you don't give a though to those habits. You can do anything you want to do. Believe in yourself and in your power to change your life for better!

Don't let yesterday take up too much of today as the best way to get ready for tomorrow is what you are doing today.
Your BL friend,
Dale

Too true.

Am ok so far. Better than I expected. With the booze towards the end I was drinking a lot in terms of volume but not drinking to get wasted. Was only 4% low carb beers and ciders. When you drink every day you get over wanting a hangover every day and throwing up.

In the end all of this crap just became a chore and the fun would come maybe once in a blue moon like it once did in the past. Even doing 7 grams of blow a day lost it's spark.

So many users I've met would love to be clean but now realise it's too late or that is just who they are. In my opinion and I can make a comment about this as I have been there etc...It is definitely about fearing change. Dreading withdrawal and the pain that comes with it.

Ah so sad just thinking about some of this.

Your own personal experiences of when off your dial don't seem to be real when you are sober. Everything just feels like a dream so to say.

 

[SoCal424]

noonoo-

Hey it sounds like you've got a good head on your shoulders and you're ready to make positive changes in your life. That is great - good for you! I don't think it's ever too late to get clean, and I agree it is about the fear of suffering withdrawals and of change. I had both for a long time. It's hard for us to keep moving forward if we are always looking in the rear view mirror.

Do your best to keep stress out of your life and instead look for the good in the world - it's out there for everyone.

You like jokes? I like posting them:
"I don't want to say I'm old and worn out, but I make sure I'm nowhere near the curb on trash day"
Your friend,
Dale

 

[Captain.Heroin]

Are you depressed man?

 

[cj]

I got clean by getting on maintenance

 

[Jabberwocky]

Are you depressed man?

I have had issues with depression and anxiety my whole life.

Have seen specialists off and on for 20 years.

I have been taking meds last 10.

Obviously I did myself no favours by taking drugs or boozing.

 

[Captain.Heroin]

I have had issues with depression and anxiety my whole life.

Have seen specialists off and on for 20 years.

I have been taking meds last 10.

Obviously I did myself no favours by taking drugs or boozing.

What meds?

Keep trying to get help man, don't give up. You're worth it.

 

[Jabberwocky]

What meds?

Keep trying to get help man, don't give up. You're worth it.

I went to see my Dr today to get a referral to see a psychiatrist. He said he can't do any more.

Unfortunately when I phoned yesterday to get a referral to see a psychiatrist the bitch on the phone told me I don't qualify or that there's not much wrong. Clueless cow. Wanting to commit suicide off and on doesn't mean much? She asked me if I knew the difference between a psychologist and psychiatrist as the psychiatrist can't do as much for me and this is after I told her I had seen help the last 20 years. No I am fucken retarded and know nothing

Let's see where this goes this time....

Overall am fucken confused this time round. Do I go down the path of trying out new meds or do I fight like no tomorrow only to fall on my ass again due to the cycles?

I have been on Cymbalta a few years, Lexapro before that. Some Dr told me to take Zyprexa but that knocked me the fuck out the first and only time I took it.

My Dr now believes I should be taking something else in addition to the anti dperession when the anti depressant isn't working. I think he mentioned epival, I forget though.

Overall I wanted to get off meds a while back when I thought I had things in control but then didn't want to stop as the side effects were fucked, i.e. brain zaps and plus I was boozing daily so wanted to minimise depression.

So it goes....