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Thread: Do females care about a guys mum?

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    Do females care about a guys mum? 
    #1
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    noonoo's Avatar
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    For me this has been a deal breaker and it has made me not get into long term relationships.

    I feel sorry for my dad however if it wasn't for him I'd disconnect from family all together.

    Mum always has some unrealistic expectations and coupled with her untreated mental health issues she can be a real challenge at times. This is bad enough for me who is already battling bipolar crap let alone bringing it to someone else. As a result it leaves me single. What could of been with some girls I do not know? I an now 33. I've been living in Australia for 30 of my 33 years of life. My folks still haven't accepted living here and as a result it leaves some cultural barriers in place.

    My older brother is the fighter in the family and he now has 6 kids of his own to a wife my mum hates. They don't talk sometimes for months. He will be off for the US soon for work and taking the family there.

    Now I am meant to be the perfect son yet I am not and never will be. I believe for my own sake I need to not let anxiety get the better of me and do whatever the fuck I want. However easier said than done.

    So ladies opinions please?

    Thank you
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    #2
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    pofacedhoe's Avatar
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    i'm a man and blaming your mum for not having a relationship is nonsense

    your brothers wife and mum dont get on but that didn't stop him did it?

    lets be realistic- you are only 33 that is not that old

    your ability to create the life you want is down to you not your mum
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    #3
    Live your life man, not be obsessed with what mum will say.
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    #4
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    llama112's Avatar
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    I do want his parents to like me yes and I always try to but I mean, people are different, sometimes it just doesn't work, but I know I always make an effort.
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    #5
    Bluelighter SamanthaB's Avatar
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    Hi Noonoo,

    Well, an interesting problem and sorry that you are having it. You deserve to be happy and have a relationship with someone in your life and your mother should not dictate whether you have that or not. As far as a solution, you find the woman you want to be with and if, or when, the first time your mom starts saying bad things to her or about her, you tell her in no uncertain terms that she cannot act like that, her behavior toward you and your S.O. is unacceptable, and if it continues, the two of you will not be seeing her. You can then see your father apart from her for lunch, etc. If he is unwilling to see you and your S.O. without your mother, that is his choice. You only need to say to your father, if he does not see things your way, is that as long as your mother treats your wife/girlfriends badly, you will not be interacting with either of them. You need to set the boundaries and stick with them and let the chips fall where they may. I venture to guess your father knows how your mother is (at least I hope so), and you will still have a relationship with him regardless if you cut your mother out of your life for her unacceptable behavior. Will all this be easy? Absolutely not, but you have to grow up and not let your mother dictate whether you have a relationship in your life or not and not let her treat you and/or your S.O. this way in future relationships. The power to fix this situation is entirely in your hands.
    Last edited by SamanthaB; 09-06-2018 at 21:31.
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    #7
    https://youtu.be/h75x6sVLcIg

    That is one narcissistic mom from that previous link.
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    #8
    Bluelight Crew Asclepius's Avatar
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