I?m just screwing myself over

[sonicwhite]

I went thru nearly all the spares I could with the gabapentin. Usually I can take four hundred mg for times a day.

I?m prescribed 800 3xday. Once I start dabbling into abusing it I can?t stop.

I?ve taken 8.400 mg today. Two monster drinks and I feel fine, but I have this unrelenting conviction to wean.

If I don?t do it and give up I?ll lose the good fight.

Idk what to do. I?m getting Kratom and that helps me fight the urge to quit, but still. It?s very hard.


I wished I never knew this drug existed .
When I was going thru a massive wave of anxiety in 08 I would buy Xanax off the streets.

When I was done I would go thru a mini withdrawals. I found out by accident that gabapentin helps withdrawals. From there it went down hill.

Someone please guide me to victory!

 

[MrRoot]

I quitted my GABAergics abuse last year and honestly I can't say any simple trick for doing that but in my opinion peer support from BL and seeing drug councelor once a week as well as visiting psychiatrist bi-weekly were the biggest things that helped me as I could discuss about my feelings and cravings with peers and pros.

Tapering didn't work for me as I couldn't stay on the schedule and would use week worth of gabapentin/pregabalin within one week and instead I just stopped cold turkey and used some clonazepam for the first few days of withdrawals.

It took few weeks to get over the increased anxiety and PTSD symptoms that started appearing again after stopping GABAergics for a week.

I had melancholy and some self-esteem problems for few months but things started to get better after three months and then it was time to stop oxycodone which went quite easily.

I don't know if 5-htp did anything but I started to take that supplement at the same time I cold turkeyd GABAergics.

Meditation and mindfullness based techniques helped alot for anxiety and you could look for some christian praying techniques?

 

[Jabberwocky]

^good advice.

I would not recommend substituting gabapentin for kratom. At least with gabapentin (GBP) you know where you're getting it from (a pharmacy I hope). I mean, if you want to you can try, but the withdrawal from kratom is pretty much as uncomfortable as GBP. As far as I'm concerned, kratom is also more difficult to properly use/regulate use of than GBP is.

Can you talk to your prescriber about how you want to get off the GBP? You have lots of options if that is what you want. Baclofen is one that comes to mind. There are other options too.

Highly recommend finding someone like a therapist who can help you work with motivation interviewing if you can find someone. They will help you make progress on accomplishing your goals.

If you can, DBT would also be great, maybe even better than MI. Rather on the pricy side and not the most accessible in everywhere, but it's really superb therapy.

 

[sonicwhite]

Yes cold turkey seems to be my way out of this.

I can?t seem to taper so maybe just going through the horrors of it will give me a greater respect for my body and what I put in it.

 

[cj]

I had a similar experience with gabapentin. I would blow through my script of 90 400mg in 48 hours or less. The withdrawal sucks but it's not benzo withdrawal level of suck. Tapering would help but if you absolutely can't I don't see anything wrong with just stopping them. If I remember correctly it lasted 4 otlr 5 days. Mostly just elevated anxiety and a wierd uncomfortable body feeling