Long story short I have symptoms of borderline personality disorder but not 100%. From my research medication doesn?t help borderline personality disorder only cognitive behavioral therapy does. Dr. Put me on 200mg lamictal, 1200mg trileptal as well as vyvanse and Dexedrine to combat lethargy. Previous to this I was on 20mg Lexapro. Total time on lexapro 6 years. Trileptal and lamical 1.5yrs. About 4-6mo ago I decided to wean off everything. Trileptal and lamical I did not notice much at all. No withdrawal no side effects. Lexapro on the other hand was a different story. I tapered by reducing the dose by 5 mg every month until I hit 2.5 mg for a few weeks. Once down to 5mg Lexapro (maybe 3months ago) I noticed I started getting more manic. Also very lethargic. Not anger but a lack of motivation to work yet more motivation to do obsessive research on your neurotransmitters, finding natural cures,etc. procrastination, mild depression(never suicidal) and definitely a increased craving for recreational drugs. Like I?m always trying to find something to take to feel normal. A few weeks ago I bought a pack of American Spirit cigarettes to get energy from nicotine and I found myself smoking like 10 per day. This is where I have to draw the line and do something. I had a prior amphetamine addiction and have weaned off and back on over the past three or four years. If I don?t take some sort of amphetamine in the morning I?m a zombie I can?t even function. When it kicks in it?s the only time I feel normal but I?m trying to reduce my amphetamine use as well. Correct me if I?m wrong but I?m thinking my problems are coming from lack of serotonin. When I look up the difference of depression from serotonin versus dopamine I fit much more traits of serotonin depression. I understand it can take a long time because I was on the Lexapro for so long but what would you guys do if you were in my shoes? It seems like the only supplement that acts on the same serotonin receptors as Lexapro is bacopa. I tried it a few days ago and just felt a little spacey but calm. Then I tried taking it two times a day and was exhausted. I also tried KannaEase and it just made me super tired. I?m trying to figure out how I can get off of everything as that is my goal.
p.s. I noticed towards the early evening I get very brain foggy and dizzy. A low dose benzodiazepam seems to take it away but I definitely am not getting hooked on that. Also what’s odd is around eight or 9 o’clock at night when the kids are in bed and the wife is asleep and I have free time to just watch TV I feel completely normal. Not overly exhausted, no cravings for recreational drugs, etc. but then when I wake up in the morning it’s awful.
p.s. I noticed towards the early evening I get very brain foggy and dizzy. A low dose benzodiazepam seems to take it away but I definitely am not getting hooked on that. Also what’s odd is around eight or 9 o’clock at night when the kids are in bed and the wife is asleep and I have free time to just watch TV I feel completely normal. Not overly exhausted, no cravings for recreational drugs, etc. but then when I wake up in the morning it’s awful.