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Thread: Slipping back into coke

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    Slipping back into coke 
    #1
    Hi there. It?s my first post so not sure if this is the right place but I?m looking for some advice. I?m 17 at the moment but when I was around 15 I had a bad coke habit where I was going through 2-3 8 balls a week. Since then I?ve been pretty good and have used maybe every 6 months or so. However in the last 2 week half term (2-3 weeks ago) I bought a gram and a half and did some every night for about 6 nights straight with some Xanax for the comedown. i didn?t use since then but did .25 last Friday without Xanax and am getting pretty bad cravings to keep doing .25 every Friday night. What would your advice be to avoid slipping back into a habit and how should I motivate myself to keep clean again? Again not sure if this is the right place but thanks for helping anyways.
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    #2
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    bptubbs's Avatar
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    Moving this to sober living mate.
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    #3
    Ok thanks wasn’t sure if this was the right place...
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    #4
    Are you using it alone or when you go out with friends?
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    #5
    Alone, I’ve always used alone since none of my friends ever touched the stuff and that’s just what I’m used to now
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    #6
    O.k, do use it before you go out or do you just chill at home using? Do you feel like hanging out with friends is shit and boring unless you're coked up? That's how it was for me. It didn't help that all of my friends were coke heads too. So you have that to your advantage, you can surround yourself with people not using it and tell one of them. If you're finding that life is shit without coke, I'd say you're leaning towards addiction and you need to cut that shit out now while you're young. You're from the UK? The help for getting off drugs and staying clean is 100x better than it was 10-15 years ago. Speak to a doctor, look online to see if there's any local drugs services in your area.
    Last edited by GreenDark; 14-05-2018 at 14:34.
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    #7
    I just chill at home using. I’ve been to services in past but never really got anything out of them. I do try to surround myself with people who don’t use but I spend most of my time alone so it’s pretty easy to use when I’m just sat in my room with the bag so easy to get...
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    #8
    I’m autistic so I prefer to spend most of my time alone anyway but drugs just make it worse cos all I wanna do is enjoy the drug without having to worry about what the people around me are thinking of me
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    #9
    Hi Monkeragon17- Nice to meet you. I've never used coke, but I still wanted to pop in and welcome you to BlueLight. This is a good place to get information, and especially to find that you are not alone.
    I don't judge - so please don't think I'm doing it now and allow me to ask you a question or two: (Think of me as strategizing with you) If you close your eyes and think about your future, what do you hope it will be? I know 17 is young, but what kind of trade do you really want work in? Do you know people with jobs you wish you could have too? Now once you've I.D.'d that, think about the steps to get there - even write them down in a journal (use your computer for that). Next, what kind of a person do you hope your friends and family will see in you as you grow into young adult hood? (again, I'm not judging - just asking for you think about it). You don't need to answer here either - I just wanted you think about these things. My Dad always did well in his job, and my goal was to do even better - to have a nice car and house one day - and to find someone to share it with me. I wanted people to like me - to be around me just because I made them feel better. I believe these are same things most everyone else wants, and I bet you do to. Do you see yourself being able to accomplish these things if you're using coke all the time? If not, please think about finding your way back to sober again.
    If you are hanging around with other users all the time, it is much harder to stay clean - far far harder, but I don't have to tell you that. If you don't know anyone that doesn't use, then meet Dale (me) and I'll be your first friend. I'm here most everyday looking to inspire ppl just like you to be the best they can be just like others have done for me here on BlueLight - and I've got the time if you do. (I'm not 17 though - think older :-)
    Peace,
    Dale
    You asked for advice - I hope you read this with the heart I sent it out to you with.
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    #10
    Thank you it was very kind of you to write that. When I’m older I guess I want what we all want, a nice partner that makes me happy and a family that does the same. One of the reasons I do drugs is that I feel like I can’t get that because I’m too shy. I guess the drugs help but I know it won’t help in the long term. Thanks again for replying it means a lot to me :-)

    ps thanks to everyone who replies I appreciate them all :-)
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    #11
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    Welcome to BL. I do have to say that 2 to 3 8-balls a week at 15 is a significant expenditure. I have to ask if the lifestyle underlying the drug use isn't as much an attraction to you as the drug itself?
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    #12
    Quote Originally Posted by jdfisse View Post
    Welcome to BL. I do have to say that 2 to 3 8-balls a week at 15 is a significant expenditure. I have to ask if the lifestyle underlying the drug use isn't as much an attraction to you as the drug itself?
    it wasn’t a motive but kind of a benefit at the time but not anymore, I mean I saw where that lead me and eventually I ended up in hospital for months. I don’t know if I still find it cool subconsciously but not as far as I know
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    #13
    Monkeragon17- Shy? Let me tell you about myself then. I remember as clear as if it were yesterday on "that" day I first noticed someone that caught my eye. OMG So good looking - I felt like a clump. Never would I go up and say hello to anyone so hot. I missed that opportunity three times on different occasions (same person) and on the fourth, as I was about to leave that club for the evening again, I did something I've never done before - totally spontaneously - expecting to get blown off or laughed at. I walked up and said hello. It got magical after that.
    Turns out most of us are just as shy - just as unsure.
    When you see that person for you - don't think about it - just go up and say hello. It could change your life.
    Take care,
    Dale
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    #14
    Quote Originally Posted by SoCal424 View Post
    Monkeragon17- Shy? Let me tell you about myself then. I remember as clear as if it were yesterday on "that" day I first noticed someone that caught my eye. OMG So good looking - I felt like a clump. Never would I go up and say hello to anyone so hot. I missed that opportunity three times on different occasions (same person) and on the fourth, as I was about to leave that club for the evening again, I did something I've never done before - totally spontaneously - expecting to get blown off or laughed at. I walked up and said hello. It got magical after that.
    Turns out most of us are just as shy - just as unsure.
    When you see that person for you - don't think about it - just go up and say hello. It could change your life.
    Take care,
    Dale
    thank you for that. I’m just wondering if you ever felt like you could have a partner or drugs but not both? Because sometimes I feel like that and I usually just feel like the drugs are the better option because they’re always there and they won’t ditch me like people if that makes sense
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    #15
    You're welcome. Now remember me the "clump" here and how I told you about how it got magical after I walked up and said hello? That was over 20 years ago and it's still perfect. Love sticks if you keep trying to be the sweet guy you were in the beginning. I don't recommend drugs and partner at the same time - because one person could get the other hooked, but who knows - maybe one could get the other unhooked. Anything is possible.

    Man, people ditch others all the time - but not every time. You may go through a lot of weeds to get to a rose, but it is worth it. The important thing is don't stop trying to get that rose. You'll know it when you see it.

    Dale
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    #16
    Quote Originally Posted by SoCal424 View Post
    You're welcome. Now remember me the "clump" here and how I told you about how it got magical after I walked up and said hello? That was over 20 years ago and it's still perfect. Love sticks if you keep trying to be the sweet guy you were in the beginning. I don't recommend drugs and partner at the same time - because one person could get the other hooked, but who knows - maybe one could get the other unhooked. Anything is possible.

    Man, people ditch others all the time - but not every time. You may go through a lot of weeds to get to a rose, but it is worth it. The important thing is don't stop trying to get that rose. You'll know it when you see it.

    Dale
    thank you. I just broke up with my former girlfriend and she’s only the second one I’ve had so I think I’m going to take some time to deal with the drugs before I try to get back on the market
    i guess a lot of guys feel like the other guys are better at this not just me
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    #17
    Some guys are better at this, but not all the girls like that kind of guy. Some want the kind of guy that will love them more than one night. Like you

    Dale
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    #18
    Quote Originally Posted by SoCal424 View Post
    Some guys are better at this, but not all the girls like that kind of guy. Some want the kind of guy that will love them more than one night. Like you

    Dale
    thanks it’s nice to hear someone say that
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    #19
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    It seems as though in the past your addiction to coke was a lot worse. Now you're starting to dabble a bit again from the looks of things, but able to hold on to the coke and wait a week in between using it again. For many people myself included that takes an immense amount of willpower. If you have the power to do that, then I think you have the power to put the blow down for good mate.

    I know it's hard to connect with people sometimes, especially on a sober level, but I think you will find if you continually put yourself in situations that appear to be uncomfortable at first, that they will continue to get easier the more you expose your self to them.

    Things just get easier from there. And you are at the perfect age to do just that. Your friends not doing the drug is a huge plus. Trust me, you are about to enter the golden age, you don't want to spend your late teens and twenties in a coked out haze. You will regret it.
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    #20
    Quote Originally Posted by CosmicG View Post
    It seems as though in the past your addiction to coke was a lot worse. Now you're starting to dabble a bit again from the looks of things, but able to hold on to the coke and wait a week in between using it again. For many people myself included that takes an immense amount of willpower. If you have the power to do that, then I think you have the power to put the blow down for good mate.

    I know it's hard to connect with people sometimes, especially on a sober level, but I think you will find if you continually put yourself in situations that appear to be uncomfortable at first, that they will continue to get easier the more you expose your self to them.

    Things just get easier from there. And you are at the perfect age to do just that. Your friends not doing the drug is a huge plus. Trust me, you are about to enter the golden age, you don't want to spend your late teens and twenties in a coked out haze. You will regret it.
    Thanks I am grateful that I’m not as bad as I used to be
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    #21
    Just an update for everyone who took the time to reply. I did slip up and bought a half gram but I’m in a much better mindset now and I’m hoping after this I’ll be able to get off the stuff again for longer this time. Thanks again to everyone who took the time to help me out
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    #22
    I did slip up and bought a half gram
    Hi Monkeragon17-

    That slip is over with,but now what about today and tomorrow? How will you make changes so those days are different? I have an idea about that: when you think about coke, instead, think Diet Coke, and put a visual of a Diet Coke soda can in your head. Do that every time "coke" enters your mind. Think of it as retraining your thinking. The other thing is keeping busy. Idle minds are setups for relapse.

    Have you ever not wanted to go somewhere, then afterwards, you thought "that wasn't so bad, I had a good time?" Have you ever walked on the sand at the ocean and been in awe of the force of nature? Have you ever went to the city area just to watch all of life in progress? I like walking down alleys because there are all kinds of interesting things to see. Yesterday, I saw someone had built this huge tomato garden in their alley and it was quite a production. I like seeing all the old cars broken down in people's back yards. I'm old enough to remember when some of them were brand new (and worth far less when new). Maybe it's time for a brand new daily plan for you?

    Do you have a dog? I have two, and one is so attached to me (and me to her) that she goes where I go (except in my car). Kitchen, bedroom - back yard - she just wants to be there. Dogs and people do learn to communicate on pretty good levels. Mine has come over and licked my arm nearly every day I've gone through withdrawals and felt sick. With dogs, that is her trying to take care of me. Maybe a dog would help you like mine do for me?

    Sending you peace and strength,
    Dale
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