I did mdma once and I'm general a nervous person and and some bad preflight nerves.
The stupid thing I did was play a whole game of soccer then cycle about 5 miles on my bike the same day. And was also coming off the end of a cold
This did not effect my anxiety towards doing the drug. I was really scared when I took the pill (approx 100mg) and immediately after I took it I didn't really care. But then gradually about 25-30 mins after I began to get more nervous again for example sweating a lot and just generally being on edge. The high was brilliant everything you could expect from your first time doing mdma. Come down was fine until I got home.
Here's the weird part. Although I was no longer high my heart was still beating fast (which isn't to abnormal my friends have had similar experiences) but to my brain I assumed I was dying. I managed to get to sleep at about 4am. The next day I went into work at 9:30am and had to leave at about 10:30 because I was panicking about the night before. I didn't know till later that my heart beating fast even though I wasn't high would happen. My friend also told me a lot later that it was a particularly bad comedown as he's quite experienced with mdma.
Two days after that I played soccer again but didn't eat properly throughout the whole day and because I was still a bit anxious because of what happened it's quite normal for someone who's anxious to notice a heart beat more. So I had to stop. With about 15 minutes to go because I was so nervous although I did make it through most of it.
I decided not to fuck around and went to see a doctor and had a ridiculous amount of ECG tests done and blood pressure I also had an Ultrasound on my heart everything came back fine.
Fast forward about 4 months and I find out that it was a bad comedown for all my friends who did it and that I did too much exercise that day and my body was already worn out before doing mdma and that I didn't eat properly when I played soccer again and heart beating fast the same day on the come down when you're not high isn't abnormal I still can't bring myself to do it. Smoking weed is very hit and miss. It can't either be horrible for me and make my heart beat fast or be fine.
The thing is even though I know my body is fine. And I know I made poor decisions the same day and the following days after doing mdma and it would be fine if I did mdma again safely. My brain goes into panic whenever I'm fronted with doing it again. I had a pill in my hand and all my friends had popped theirs and I had to give it away because I couldn't do it. Is there a way around this? How can I get through to my brain what I already know! Any related stories I'd love to hear. This is also putting me off doing LSD as I'm worried it'll make my heart beat fast and I'll end up sitting in a corner crying because I'm shitting myself. Thanks
A side question if I got myself on prescribed Xanax to calm my nerves, taking it how it is properly intended would it put me at any risk if I could bring myself to do mdma again
The stupid thing I did was play a whole game of soccer then cycle about 5 miles on my bike the same day. And was also coming off the end of a cold
This did not effect my anxiety towards doing the drug. I was really scared when I took the pill (approx 100mg) and immediately after I took it I didn't really care. But then gradually about 25-30 mins after I began to get more nervous again for example sweating a lot and just generally being on edge. The high was brilliant everything you could expect from your first time doing mdma. Come down was fine until I got home.
Here's the weird part. Although I was no longer high my heart was still beating fast (which isn't to abnormal my friends have had similar experiences) but to my brain I assumed I was dying. I managed to get to sleep at about 4am. The next day I went into work at 9:30am and had to leave at about 10:30 because I was panicking about the night before. I didn't know till later that my heart beating fast even though I wasn't high would happen. My friend also told me a lot later that it was a particularly bad comedown as he's quite experienced with mdma.
Two days after that I played soccer again but didn't eat properly throughout the whole day and because I was still a bit anxious because of what happened it's quite normal for someone who's anxious to notice a heart beat more. So I had to stop. With about 15 minutes to go because I was so nervous although I did make it through most of it.
I decided not to fuck around and went to see a doctor and had a ridiculous amount of ECG tests done and blood pressure I also had an Ultrasound on my heart everything came back fine.
Fast forward about 4 months and I find out that it was a bad comedown for all my friends who did it and that I did too much exercise that day and my body was already worn out before doing mdma and that I didn't eat properly when I played soccer again and heart beating fast the same day on the come down when you're not high isn't abnormal I still can't bring myself to do it. Smoking weed is very hit and miss. It can't either be horrible for me and make my heart beat fast or be fine.
The thing is even though I know my body is fine. And I know I made poor decisions the same day and the following days after doing mdma and it would be fine if I did mdma again safely. My brain goes into panic whenever I'm fronted with doing it again. I had a pill in my hand and all my friends had popped theirs and I had to give it away because I couldn't do it. Is there a way around this? How can I get through to my brain what I already know! Any related stories I'd love to hear. This is also putting me off doing LSD as I'm worried it'll make my heart beat fast and I'll end up sitting in a corner crying because I'm shitting myself. Thanks
A side question if I got myself on prescribed Xanax to calm my nerves, taking it how it is properly intended would it put me at any risk if I could bring myself to do mdma again
