anyone else ever get an abcess surgically removed? Have to pack wound?

[Holeindaddysarm]

Short story long is...
I've been using IV heroin for about five years. The last two or so years I was moderately successful in a methadone maintenance program, but stupidly decided I didn't need that anymore, tapered off methadone completely, stayed all the way clean for a month (ok maybe like 22 days) and went back to the damned needle.
Fast forward six months I'm back on methadone, only using dope maybe half the time, and having mostly good luck using only clean works and not missing or getting infections-
Well- The ditch in my right arm underneath a tattoo I inject into, became rather warm and swollen and painful to the point where I couldn't bend my arm or straighten it it was stuck like a boomerang. I waited 24 more hours went to the hospital, no insurance, they checked me in and admitted me almost immediately. Two days of IV morphine and Roxies every six hours and they wheeled me into the operating room. I wake up two hours later with an ice cream scoop size hole out of my right arm filled with 1 inch gauze. I'm told I have to change this wound dressing once a day and keep the wound open until it heals from the bottom.
(Bonus-once I was discharged from the hospital I went to the methadone clinic the next day, they tested me for being absent, I showed positive for benzo's because I was put under general anesthesia, and they cut my dose in half -wonderful)
The day after I got out of the hospital was yesterday and the worst, I scored someone's take out in the parking lot for 40 bucks and went home and showered and attempted to change my dressing. Let's just say I've never had my ears ring with static from anxiety before, I nearly passed out I could hear my own heartbeat and basically had to perform surgery on myself.
I am looking for people that have been through something similar I guess, so I don't feel like such a lowlife heroin junkie, with a literal hole in my arm.
I haven't used in 6 days.

 

[herbavore]

I'm sorry you are going through this and I hope that you can get back to a regimen of methadone only in the near future. As far as the wound and the anxiety associated with it, can you go back to the hospital and ask for more information/training on how to best change the dressing? I know this probably feeds into feeling like a "low life junkie" but don't let it. Hold your head high and accept that this is where you are right now but this does not define you. You are struggling with an addiction and you have nothing to feel ashamed of.

 

[LopLover]

Been there, done that, bought the T-shirt. I've had two abcesses cut out surgically and I've lanced one myself and drained it. Successfully, I might add, and without the humongo scar the doctors left when they did it. Kind of makes me wonder if they didn't leave such a scar for their own reasons, since it obviously wasn't necessary. I never packed the one I did, just took a needle-less syringe and rinsed it with water, including under the skin, put Neosporin on it and called it good. The ones they did were packed , but I didn't have to repack them, fortunately, since there's no way I could have shoved anywhere near that much junk under my skin. When I started pulling the gauze out, it was like never-ending. Like in a horror flick, it just kept coming and coming. I probably should have repacked it, because now I do have holes in my arms that are noticeable, but there's so much wrong with my skin just from getting old and having to be on Prednisone so much that I don't think it's even noticeable. Herbavore is right, though--this doesn't define you. Hey, it happens to non-users also, from something like a splinter forming an infection or whatever. If you have questions about changing a dressing, you can probably do a Google or youTube search to learn how. At this point, as long as you don't get it re-infected, you probably can't harm yourself any more that you already have, so don't worry too much about it. Hopefully the program will see that you aren't taking benzos after a couple of clean urines and raise your dose back up. That's so stupid of them, though. Using on top of your dose should indicate that your dose should be higher if anything. I'm so glad I'm off that merry-go-round! I am still on Sub, however, so I try not to toot my own horn too loudly. Hope you recover smoothly, both from your wound and relapse.

 

[Holeindaddysarm]

Thank you guys/gals for responding. It's healing up nicely, only about 1/2" deep (was like 2") and barely have to pack it. Working back up to my dose, I'm at 60mg now and not feeling entirely like shit, just first thing in the morning. Thanks for saying all that nice stuff, I'm pretty depressed about all this, ashamed and embarrassed also. It's almost summer and I'm going to have a gnarly fucking scar dead center of my super secret junkie cobra tattoo in the ditch of my right arm. Now that the wound is close to healed from the bottom up I was thinking about butterfly taping it closed and trying to get it to heal somewhat normally, instead of a giant 2" scar. I don't know. I appreciate your responses a lot I don't have anyone to talk to about this shit.
P.s.
Went to my GP and tried for a scrip for benzoz, she gave me goddamn Paxil and Zoloft and the pharmacist tells me that those meds can INCREASE anxiety/depression for 2-4 weeks before it gets better. Sorry, but I don't have the mental stability to be playing Russian roulette with negative side effects. You know what doesn't make anxiety worse? Xanax! Fuckin docs.

 

[cdin]

until it does...