When I think of you I feel new inside

[sonicwhite]

Take it away, I beg you, take it all away
The pain it causes, it makes me wish I could fade away
If they knew what you knew, they'd probably shun me
I'm surprised you know it all and you love me
I know I break your heart
Body of death, give me rest if my heart stops
Then it don't hurt no more, can't get worse no more
Can't pursue all these desires, it ain't cursed no more
No more lies about my worth no more
I understand the thoughts of suicide that do reside
But when I stop and think about my family, I feel new inside
I promised I would die a thousand deaths 'fore I cause them any pain
But somehow I end up killing everything
I cry for you
If you feel a dark, twisted, heart-wrenching, hate-to-see-your-own-reflection
Praying for an intervention, feeling guilt and feeling shame
I just call on Jesus name
Praying daily, can you take away this pain?
Take the thorn away
Still, it remains, I
Feel the same, I
Know that I'm here, but
Still feel insane
Satan would love to see my give up and throw up my hands
He say I'm guilty but You say I'm clean

 

[sonicwhite]

My head hit's the pillow, a weeping willow, I can't sleep, a pain so deep it bellows
But these cellos help just to keep me mellow, hand's on my head, touched knees to elbow
I'm hunched over, emotion just flows over, these cold shoulders are both frozen, you don't know me
I keep saying it, I can't stress it enough, so keep playing it and stand next to the subs

 

[sonicwhite]

Yeah, Sunday morning, or Sunday mourning
I woke up dead inside from all the hurt I saw before me
Evil tryna take away my testimony
Starin' at my phone, feelin' like a phony
Oh, I cry for you, I would die for you
To escape the pain I feel from all that I've been through
I feel it in my soul and in my chest
Take away this ugly thorn inside my flesh
Give me death
But grace is sufficient to start my mission
I'm so far from perfect, can't believe they listen
But hear a broken man 'til your healin' happens
And hear a liar tell you truth to bring you gladness
I could never boast in my accomplishments
I can only hope in God with confidence
Opposite of optimist, U and I are consonants
Broken all the vowels, deservin' of every consequence
Will you cry for me, or will you judge me?
Will you throw stones at my head, or will you love me?
I could never be everything that you wanna see
But crooked sticks draw straight lines, just look at me
(But crooked sticks draw straight lines, just look at me)

 

[herbavore]

I'm lovin' these, sonic. Keep writing!

 

[sonicwhite]

herbavore. Take it easy. God give her the strength to endure what?s she is going thru.

Father forgive us for our sins.

Father we love You more then anything.