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Mental Health I hate my life

L

Labgeek

Greenlighter
Joined
Feb 24, 2018
Messages
2
I thought being smart and working hard would be enough to have a job and some degree of success in life. I was very wrong. I suffer from the disease of addiction which is only a disease in a theoretical sense. From a practical standpoint it's a reason to strip away a persons career and livelihood. If you happen to spend $150,000 getting a pharmacy degree then discover you have the "disease" of addiction, don't look for a second chance because it won't happen. The result: stuck with $150,000 in debt and no way to work to pay it off. Slipping through the cracks... if it were truely a disease, one would think a person might get the chance to treat the disease and still have a job. Not the case. I treat this disease on a daily basis with a spiritual approach, but it doesn't make a bit of difference from the perspective of those in charge. Trying to find a way to make a living so I might be able to retire someday. Seems more likely I'm on the D&D plan for retirement. Work until death or disability!
 
I am really sorry to hear all this. Just remember, life is unpredictable. You never know what will happen tommorow, in one month, in one year. Just try to stay positive! Something good WILL happen! Best of luck :)
 
Mate, so what's the back story here...? You got yourself into a pharma position then lost it due to addiction?

There must surely be other roles you could do with your qualifications which aren't predicated upon being nearby to any pharmaceuticals. Hell, my first degree was in law and I didn't use that until maybe ten years later. Don't feel you're defined by your qualifications and history. If you find something where there are no moral or ethical conflicts for you to be a part then please don't hesitate to grab it with both hands.
 
I would think there would be a great role for you in the recovery community with your background. I don't know the details of whether you're sober now or if you only lost your job or lost your license.
 
Hey Labgeek, one of my friends is in the same boat. He's a programmer with a felony theft conviction and no company will hire a programmer with a felony theft conviction on their record when access to networks with sensitive and proprietary information is part of the job. It sucks and I won't blow sunshine up your ass by telling you everything's going to be ok, but if you have the smarts to make it through pharmacy school, you have the smarts to figure out how to get back on your feet.
 
We care about you! It is a disease, but our society is severely lacking in understanding. There are people out there, I can guarantee, that go through a lot of effort and grief in their daily lives, and whom you could relate to.

I think it's good that you started by reaching out to us here. We might be able to provide you with some support and direction so that you can independently find real-world support and treatments.

So...let's start here!

When you talk of spiritual treatment, can you elaborate?

Do you take meds?

DO you have anyone you can talk to in-person?
 
Are you certain that you are unable to work as a pharmacist? I wouldn't cross that out immediately or forever even if you do consider yourself an addict.
 
Drive for uber or something where you can be your own boss in the meantime until you can clear your name for whatever charge you picked up.

Addiction is not a disease. If you believe that then it makes it easier, almost acceptable to relapse or keep using. Doctor's just use the 'disease theory' because it is JUST A THEORY that keeps sick people coming back. 'Oh its my disease I relapsed.' I used to use this sort of thinking to justify my drinking (like Randy from South Park)

I used to believe it was a disease and justified using booze/heroin for my 'disease.' Look into Rational Recovery at rational.org
 
I would seek an attorney. I have personal friends in the medical profession that are recovering addicts, bi-polar, etc. They have a stonewall support system and rules but they still practice. Also what about teaching college level until you can exhaust all possibilities available?
 
I also hate my life now just as much as I used to love her. I can not date a person whom I like, I quit my job and had to return to live with my parents. But I'm sure that it will pass, as all good things have gone before. Sometimes you just need friends alongside. In my hometown many of them. Hold on, dude. Everything will be better.
 
bro i hated my life too i hated my brother but im 8 days clean today and life is soo good and my brother is soo cool dude i love him again...try to get clean ferreals life gets better
 
Could you do medical research then?
 
Last edited by a moderator:
Sorry I got a bit confused up there. chomy, Labgeek, could you tell me what sections were yours? Thanks,
 
Whoa I only typed in the medical research part, dunno where the other text came from.
 
Hating your life is okay. It's hating yourself for living it that is the problem. A life can be changed. Always. Right up to the last breath you have agency over your story. If you feel you are simply working for nothing but $$ until you die then it sounds like you need to go on a walk-about. At least a mental one. Explore, imagine without censoring yourself. What comes up? What do you tell yourself 'no' about?
 
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