Am i really gay or just a strong fetish?

[nikola9222]

Hi i am 23 years old guy and for 5 years already i regularly fantasise about gay sex and men and regullarly watch gay porn... but the only gay porn that turns me on is where a big muscled older guy is penetrating a really young weak boy... cause i can relate to that boy... fantasies are similar and i regullary anally masterbate and when i do.. i only think about men... but thats not it... few days ago i got really horny and had a craving to try out gay sex... so i made a online sex profile and found a guy we meet and the plan was just to give him a blowjob but one thing led to another and i ended up getting penetrated and having the most mindblowing orgsam of my life i mean i was shaking so much i could not control it, i was shocked myself... i completely enjoyed having gay sex but long as i am the bottom and submissive its a huge turn on...
so i went home and thought so i like to be penetrated by older big men and give blowjobs and be submissive... but i am not gay... i dont want to be in a relationship with a man i don't have any desire... i don't check out men on the street, only women and a lot..... i desire a woman in my life etc... but then i start to think... i never been with a girl, yes i kissed 1 time a girl and liked it but thats all... whole my life i found penis really attractive while a vagina i think it looks disqusting visually but the whole female body i find attractive... i mean ever since i was a kid watching tv late at night i would come across a porn channel and i would see this girl getting undressed and i would watch until she shows her vagina, i would be like "eeeeww" i didn't undrestand it then but i didn't like seeing vagina as a kid... but when i switched back and saw this guy pulling his pants off and seeing his penis it always felt good to watch penises.. and when this girl started blowjobing him and getting penetrated i started to imagine that i am her.. i wanted to act submissive like her the thought of me being on my knees and begging for his penis was a huge turn on... i didn't understand it then but i orgsamed to those kind of thoughts alot as a kid... but meanwhile i would check out in magazines hot girls and get turned on... it is really confusing.. and i start to think what if i get a girlfriend who i love will i still have gay dreams, and fantasies will i crave to be submissive to a man again... i only have these thoughts when horny.... i am really confused...

 

[mal3volent]

Hey nikola...if you are being 100% honest with everything you've said here, I have determined that you are indeed gay. It's normal for people to be curious, but you have a pretty consistent history of being turned off by women. You are at the very least bisexual, but honestly I think you are just struggling with the concepts of masculinity and femininity. All types of people like to be dominated so that isn't really a factor. The unavoidable fact of the matter is that you are repulsed by vaginas and had full on sex with a man (and loved it).

It's not the end of the world either way. Just be who you are. Have a nice day.

 

[herbavore]

If we could all just let ourselves be sexual without putting any prefix in front of it when we are feeling it we could once and for all let this label-driven, stigma-driven confusion sputter out and die. And we would all be happier. Instead we get LGBTQRSUVWXYZ and more stress about where we fit into the scheme of things rather than less, though these narrow categories are designed for clarity instead of confusion.

To me it sounds like you prefer male sex and you even know what kind of male sex you like. That's great. Being disgusted by vaginas as a little boy has nothing to do with anything, though. Many a heterosexual person has started life disgusted by the genitalia of the opposite sex and ended up loving that same genitalia later in life. Keep your mind open and your own trust in the desires of your body strong. The only thing wrong IMO when it comes to sexuality is harming another person physically or psychologically. Consensual sex between two people old enough to freely give consent is between those two people.

 

[mal3volent]

If we could all just let ourselves be sexual without putting any prefix in front of it when we are feeling it we could once and for all let this label-driven, stigma-driven confusion sputter out and die. And we would all be happier. Instead we get LGBTQRSUVWXYZ and more stress about where we fit into the scheme of things rather than less, though these narrow categories are designed for clarity instead of confusion.

To me it sounds like you prefer male sex and you even know what kind of male sex you like. That's great. Being disgusted by vaginas as a little boy has nothing to do with anything, though. Many a heterosexual person has started life disgusted by the genitalia of the opposite sex and ended up loving that same genitalia later in life. Keep your mind open and your own trust in the desires of your body strong. The only thing wrong IMO when it comes to sexuality is harming another person physically or psychologically. Consensual sex between two people old enough to freely give consent is between those two people.

Completely agree... I was just playing along with the thread title asking 'am I gay?'
So I said 'yes, I have determined that you are' in a somewhat tongue-in-cheek tone.

I'm completely on board with moving on from labels all together, but sometimes they are useful when someone is trying to work out exactly how they feel and get a grasp of where they fit in.

 

[Jabberwocky]

penis is fine, just a happy skin mushroom lol. Honestly just think of it that way. Maybe you're fixating on aspects of penis you don't like

Edit: people will get grossed out by my saying this but check out some furry porn lol. Not even asking you to be aroused but some really nice depictions of guys when the art is good. And the cocks are way more artistic than irl. Comes as masculine or as feminine as you could ever imagine Lots of furries can't convert their gay feelings to real life but I think it's gradually gotten better. Again DON'T GET GROSSED OUT just imagine the artist as they're trying to get at ease with their own sexuality. Was never bestiality to me, just people trying to work out what they find attractive about humans in real life

Edit: it's just interesting FLAVORS OF GUYS to me

Edit: if this makes it any better, supposedly furry stuff is related to trans issues, the whole feeling of being in the wrong body :/ lots of overlap with the people irl

 

[JK25]

If you have to ask then you are somewhere in the middle. I like big dicks and I cannot lie, dick for breakfast, dick for lunch, dick for dinner, dick is all I want. Fuck my I am too gay even for myself. Don't trust that thing that looks like a moth and a butterfly's bastard child that got caught on an electric fence. No Va-jay-jays for me no thank you. Dick will do.

 

[Jabberwocky]

If you have to ask then you are somewhere in the middle. I like big dicks and I cannot lie, dick for breakfast, dick for lunch, dick for dinner, dick is all I want. Fuck my I am too gay even for myself. Don't trust that thing that looks like a moth and a butterfly's bastard child that got caught on an electric fence. No Va-jay-jays for me no thank you. Dick will do.

lol

if this is a comforting thought even one of the BLUE COLLAR COMEDY TOUR (you just might be a redneck) guys made a joke about how even straight guys prefer big dicks in porn, not crappy flaccid ones

 

[VerbalTruist]

Do what makes you happy as long as it doesn't fuck with someone else's happiness, man. If you don't want to be gay, but you want to fuck with guys, do it. You don't need a label. On the other hand, if you want to be gay, then be gay.

 

[Trajal]

Yah, no need for any specific label, maybe you're heteroflexible or maybe it's just a taboo fantasy for you that helps you get off. Whatever works mate, anyone who judges you for what you do or don't like is a fool.

i would suggest that you be honest if you ever find yourself in any kind of relationship though. If it's not working out, in your case most likely cause will be a confused sexuality I suspect, so be sure and take it slow and communicate with the other person. No need for anyone to get hurt.

Im sure you'll figure it out in the end. When I was younger I had similar fantasies to you, but in real life I couldn't even kiss a bloke, lol. Did nothing for me whatsoever. So, who knows?

 

[Jabberwocky]

nobody thinks it's great that one of Jeff Foxworthy's friends, of all people made a joke for the 'mostly straight' guys in the audience to enjoy? haha

 

[treezy z]

You sound pretty damn gay, if you're in Europe or North America you don't have much to worry about it's probably the best time in history for gays here.

Wear condoms, male on male anal sex is one of or the leading cause of HIV transmission.

 

[Zopiclone bandit]

If you have to ask then you are somewhere in the middle. I like big dicks and I cannot lie, dick for breakfast, dick for lunch, dick for dinner, dick is all I want. Fuck my I am too gay even for myself. Don't trust that thing that looks like a moth and a butterfly's bastard child that got caught on an electric fence. No Va-jay-jays for me no thank you. Dick will do.

Fuck sake, that made me laugh till my stomach hurt.

 

[Zopiclone bandit]

OP should really try fisting, I once saw some video on Xham**** of some weird german guys doing it & the guy giving the dose managed to get his whole arm up there upto his shoulder. The guy taking it didn't sound very happy though & you could see his ribs move 8(

 

[pofacedhoe]

answered