dumbstruck
Bluelighter
- Joined
- Sep 30, 2010
- Messages
- 58
Tl;Dr -> help me figure out how NMDA antagonist addiction has led to my previous kratom addiction and current alcohol addiction (now that I'm off kratom)
Howdy folks.
Most is in the title... I seem to be one of the people who deeply loves dissociative use. I stopped all other drug use by becoming addicted to kratom. It filled the desire to play with other drugs and left me functional and happy.
I have since, some 3 to 4 months ago, managed to lower myself to minute doses (for withdrawal) and have now been completely off kratom. However this has coincided with a great increase in alcohol use/abuse. It is worth noting I was taking a kg of kratom a week by myself. I have a post on BL about this if interested ( http://bluelight.org/vb/threads/826...e-kratom-addiction-(8ish-years-use-4-5-daily)
I realized recently that both kratom and alcohol have NMDA antagonist effects. And it made me notice for the 15 years I have embraced drug use that I have always used a NMDA antagonist regularly. Almost always weekly and often re-dosing some dozens of times in a session. It sure was nice to have a couple days without responsibility and staying highly dissociated for days on end.
To the point, does anyone have insight on whether or not I should delve into whether or not my current alcohol addiction is related to my past NMDA antagonist addiction? Or am I misinterpreting what is the common thread in my drug use? Am I just a kratom/alcohol/whatever drug addict, or is it specifically the dissociation that my self seems to crave?
Howdy folks.
Most is in the title... I seem to be one of the people who deeply loves dissociative use. I stopped all other drug use by becoming addicted to kratom. It filled the desire to play with other drugs and left me functional and happy.
I have since, some 3 to 4 months ago, managed to lower myself to minute doses (for withdrawal) and have now been completely off kratom. However this has coincided with a great increase in alcohol use/abuse. It is worth noting I was taking a kg of kratom a week by myself. I have a post on BL about this if interested ( http://bluelight.org/vb/threads/826...e-kratom-addiction-(8ish-years-use-4-5-daily)
I realized recently that both kratom and alcohol have NMDA antagonist effects. And it made me notice for the 15 years I have embraced drug use that I have always used a NMDA antagonist regularly. Almost always weekly and often re-dosing some dozens of times in a session. It sure was nice to have a couple days without responsibility and staying highly dissociated for days on end.
To the point, does anyone have insight on whether or not I should delve into whether or not my current alcohol addiction is related to my past NMDA antagonist addiction? Or am I misinterpreting what is the common thread in my drug use? Am I just a kratom/alcohol/whatever drug addict, or is it specifically the dissociation that my self seems to crave?