How do you deal with holidays when you're in recovery?

[Jabberwocky]

How do you think the holiday's are more skillfully addressed for someone who is in recovery?

What has been your experience of dealing with holidays in recovery, the challenges and successes?

I have some funny stories I hope to share with you all at some point. Right now I think I need to sleep, but just wanted to get this going so I don't forget.

Happy Hanukkah btw

 

[mrsnowygrainius]

i honestly hate the holidays now... my family gets wasted on their wine while i sit there numb on my suboxone, these people don't realize that being around their libations and watching them get trashed throughout the night makes me wanna go shoot heroin all by myself

all the magic is gone... i do enjoy giving people gifts tho, only part i like.. just wish i wouldn't have to be around them drinking

the WORST part of the christmas holiday is that i see my cousins and family and everyone talks about how well their lives are going... she's running a store now... he just published scholarly works and is getting a masters... she flys all around the country partying and making money with her bf

and me ? i can't contribute nothing to their conversations just a drug aaddict here who threw his life away and now jut sits around high on suboxone all day everyday

 

[tired of crap]

My road to recovery started about 2 years ago.

I managed a family gathering 2 years ago without drinking as it was my year to be DD, so my partner drank at the family dinner. But the path was slippery at that time and I still drank over the holidays.
Last year Moms health significantly deteriorated around this time and I was back to drinking full time. We did not celebrate last year.

This year Im having my moms side of the family here. Then I also have to drive to my dads side because they wont come be with moms side... Idiots.
So I have to cook twice, but thats ok, I dont really mind.
Last time I did christmas dinner I was wasted before everyone got there but I had preplanned a cooking schedule.
Everything finished at the same time and tasted great. But I passed out before dessert and was out for the night. :-|
Not this year though.

As to how to address the holidays for someone in recovery
Id suggest cranberries... Ha

But seriously... Id suggest avoiding stressful situations.
Unfortunately a lot of times the stress can be caused by family and that may mean having to tell them sorry. Sometimes we have to be selfish though. Your health is more important than some commercialized holiday. If they truly love us they should understand. If not, fuck em anyways ha...

Best of luck this season folks.

 

[tired of crap]

Hows everyone feeling about the holidays fast approaching?

I seemed rather oblivious to them until today when I realized I havent purchased or even planned anything for my dinner. Thats on the menu for today, after work.

Otherwise Im the least stressed in years, so far... but we'll see once everyone gets together and starts drinking.
I had a few drinks with friends on the weekend, the first time in 2 months, it was ok but nothing special, though I still felt the compulsion to keep going.
Despite this recent indulgence Id like to remain alcohol free for the remainder of this holiday season. Itd be the first time in about 10 years.
It may be a silly goal but I think itd be a nice way to spend the holidays.

Hope everyone is making their list and checking it twice.

 

[Grinders Kiefers]

My parents are coming in town from the 23rd-26th. Fortunately, they understand my recovery and won't take it personally if I choose to not be around them the entire time they're here. My brothers are addicts as well, but they live in the south and I won't have to interact with them this year. I've felt pretty distant from my family in the past few years, but it's not a bad thing. They are sick in their own ways and being close to them only hinders my growth and progress. Anyway, I digress...I plan to stay close to my support and recovery folks and hit up a couple NA meetings around the holidays.

 

[Alldonewithit]

I was hoping to be 100% by Xmas. It's been 3 weeks since my last opiate, and I'm at about 85%. Gaining Natural energy and full nights sleep are my only side effects.

 

[Jabberwocky]

I thought last night was Christmas Eve

 

[GiNa LyNnxx]

I am a terrible gift wrapper haha.. but at least I got them all wrapped..

My parents are coming in town from the 23rd-26th. Fortunately, they understand my recovery and won't take it personally if I choose to not be around them the entire time they're here. My brothers are addicts as well, but they live in the south and I won't have to interact with them this year. I've felt pretty distant from my family in the past few years, but it's not a bad thing. They are sick in their own ways and being close to them only hinders my growth and progress. Anyway, I digress...I plan to stay close to my support and recovery folks and hit up a couple NA meetings around the holidays.

A lot of people just do not understand addiction.. do your parents drink or use? If I was you o would just get together with them for a bit and then go to a meeting.. that's most likely what I'm doing)

I thought last night was Christmas Eve

And you were upset Santa didn't come???

 

[Jabberwocky]

And you were upset Santa didn't come???

hehehe

 

[Grinders Kiefers]

I am a terrible gift wrapper haha.. but at least I got them all wrapped..


A lot of people just do not understand addiction.. do your parents drink or use? If I was you o would just get together with them for a bit and then go to a meeting.. that's most likely what I'm doing)

I totally agree. It's baffling to me that my parents have watched all three of their children suffer from addiction, yet seem to have almost no insight into how it may have happened or what we go through. I still hold on to a fair bit of resentment about them never seeking any sort of therapy or outside support throughout all of this turmoil. My parents drink, but not to excess. I would say my mom is a manipulative workaholic and drama addict, while my dad is a moody, passive codependent who kowtows to mom. I'm only really beginning to see the depth of their lunacy, and it's both sad and gratifying to recognize that I'm not the (only) one who's fucked up.

That's exactly what I did. I've been the meetings the past three days and god, did I need it. I reached out a few times to sponsor and other support to vent about how angry I was at some of my folks' behavior. I think I try very hard to be tolerant and gracious, but there's something about being with them that brings me to the edge. Oh well, they're gone now and I made it through unscathed.

 

[Alldonewithit]

Thank God for my wife is all i have to say. This will be the last time she has to do it on her own. We've been together 20yrs, and half of those she's taken on the brunt of all the shopping and wrapping.... Never again.