I’m curious about any ADD regulars who are getting on in years but still doing their thing with recreational substances. We all got turned-on in different ways and moseyed through the years, keeping on doing it, and here we are. People grow out of things or get variously warned off, but how many older readers still plan the odd pinger-night, acid or shroom trip into the calendar? How about having enough bud on hand to catch a buzz anytime you want, or purposely drinking more than you usually would once in a while? All the bad press, legal penalties and general stigma haven’t deterred you from such risky behaviours – age notwithstanding, so what is it that keeps the mischief bubbling up in your lives? What’s next?
Old enough to know better?
- Thread starter losthippy
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andyturbo
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Great topic losthippy!
I think the aspect of having a big interest in Chemistry, Drug Chemistry- in both physical science and medicle/effects, Having a place too discuss, learn or even just browse when bored with others who share simular interests.
I generally enjoy talking about a large range of things that we do here. So that side i consider a hobby. And too state the obvious one which i think we all share, is a genuine passion for harm reduction.
I dont feel i need to describe the use of drugs and why i mostly enjoy it. Im pretty sure most people reading this would know the feeling
Also music...its a connection too my youth that still remains unchanged. And as the Katracid track goes says "seeing the colors of trance is like feeling the power of Acid."
I think the aspect of having a big interest in Chemistry, Drug Chemistry- in both physical science and medicle/effects, Having a place too discuss, learn or even just browse when bored with others who share simular interests.
I generally enjoy talking about a large range of things that we do here. So that side i consider a hobby. And too state the obvious one which i think we all share, is a genuine passion for harm reduction.
I dont feel i need to describe the use of drugs and why i mostly enjoy it. Im pretty sure most people reading this would know the feeling
Also music...its a connection too my youth that still remains unchanged. And as the Katracid track goes says "seeing the colors of trance is like feeling the power of Acid."
I agree. This is a great point of discussion and something I've been pondering recently, too.
haha you make it sound so wholesome!
Personally, I feel frustrated by the fact that in some sense I "know better" than to use things in a harmful way, but continue to do it anyway. (Why I do it is a whole other question, which I probably can't even answer coherently.) Especially these days as I stumble from my 30s into my 40s I am feeling the negative effects of substance (mis)use more than ever and it often ends with some serious regret. I don't think I can ever take any kind of stimulant again - the comedown is now much worse than any of the good bits. Simply not worth it at all.
Although I've had years of daily opiate/opioid use, at the moment my battle feels more mundane but in a way far more mainstream: alcohol.
When it comes to drinking I really do believe I should know better. I have a fair alcohol tolerance and plenty of drinking experience since my teens, but I still semi-regularly drink too much. Getting shitfaced and stumbling around, eventually retiring to the can for a good ol' puke fest is a part of life for many folks in their 20s but it gets to be seriously embarrassing when you're older and not in the company of people who drink like that.
It's not even that I actually did anything stupid. Years of over-drinking experience have made me quite well behaved even when I can't walk or talk right. It's just the personal shame of yet again going over my well-tested limit and feeling I don't have control of it.
Besides my adult kids still wondering when I'm going to grow up, 40+ years of trying things out has still left me in a good place, body and head-wise. I had a great tour-guide to learn from in the '70's when cid, coke and goey were cheap and strong. Getting decent bud instead of shitty leaf was more difficult for a while till I learned to grow it. Belonephobia kept me away from needles so I tested my outer limits elsewhere and struck a balance between work, raising a family and feeding my head. As long as I was organised, in control of my setting and good-to-go I enjoyed psychedelics 4-6 times a year for decades. I was happy with that and learned a lot. Some substances just didn't suit because I couldn't function properly on or after them so the list shortened. Holding down a 'sensitive' job and hiding in plain-sight still had its moments, hahaha. Decades on, contacts have dried up and so too have my go-to faves, so these days its bud and booze. No complaints here. The old farts I know would be mortified to learn of my still-illegal predilection so I say nothing unless provoked by ignorant claims or other stupid shit. I think knowledge scares them. How can you know about things like that, they ask. That's why BL is a good place to stay in touch with like-minded people and keep Neil Young's Hey hey my my ticking over in my head. Rock-on tomorrow! Stay safe.
andyturbo
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Thats a very good point about knowledge. The same has happend to me lots when it comes to accidently ending up in the middle of a conversation after over hearing.
For example i was on the phone too my mum and we were discussing my dad whos depression and anxiety has started geting a lot worse. She said well went to the doctors and they've changed one of his medications around, the anxiety one. The convo went like this:
Me: Oh so his completely off diazepam now?
Mum: No, no it was ..um..valium..and he was taking 2 of those a day.
ME: Oh sorry, yes Diazepam is the actual chemical, Valium is the brand name. Okay, so what have they substituted the 2xmg diazepam with?
Mum: A stronger version of Valium and his to take it 3 times a day.
Me: Interesting. Can you remember the name?
Mum: *sigh* jeez Andrew..umm ..Adivan?..actvan..?
Me: Oh yep. Actavin..yeah thats lorazepam..its a benzodiazpine like valium but slightly stronger initially. Is he on then 2.5mgs or ...
MUM: HANG on ill get the bloody box..*waits*.. yes..activan 2.5mg 3 times a day.. why do you know all this you wernt ever on these were you?
ME: OH um no, i dont know, i was just reading about them a while ago when i was bored.
My favorite is when i go to my GP. We are really close, he has been my gp from when i was 12 untill now 28. And over time ive told him everything. We've established a "dont bullshit me, and ill do my best to help you out" realationship.
Im on 2mg clonazepam and 10mg diazepam atm.. back a year ago i was also geting 20mg temazepam ( Yes i often got funny looks from the chemist coming in with 3 benzo scripts from the same doctor)
And i remember one time last year going in too get my normal and saying hey mark can i try out nitrazepam instead of the temazepam inwas reading on a forum some people found it better. And he goes "Sure.. ... nitrazepam..nitrazepam..*starts scrolling on computer*"
Me: Mogadom
Him: Thats it! MOGADOM! Cheers Andy
Haha good times
For example i was on the phone too my mum and we were discussing my dad whos depression and anxiety has started geting a lot worse. She said well went to the doctors and they've changed one of his medications around, the anxiety one. The convo went like this:
Me: Oh so his completely off diazepam now?
Mum: No, no it was ..um..valium..and he was taking 2 of those a day.
ME: Oh sorry, yes Diazepam is the actual chemical, Valium is the brand name. Okay, so what have they substituted the 2xmg diazepam with?
Mum: A stronger version of Valium and his to take it 3 times a day.
Me: Interesting. Can you remember the name?
Mum: *sigh* jeez Andrew..umm ..Adivan?..actvan..?
Me: Oh yep. Actavin..yeah thats lorazepam..its a benzodiazpine like valium but slightly stronger initially. Is he on then 2.5mgs or ...
MUM: HANG on ill get the bloody box..*waits*.. yes..activan 2.5mg 3 times a day.. why do you know all this you wernt ever on these were you?
ME: OH um no, i dont know, i was just reading about them a while ago when i was bored.
My favorite is when i go to my GP. We are really close, he has been my gp from when i was 12 untill now 28. And over time ive told him everything. We've established a "dont bullshit me, and ill do my best to help you out" realationship.
Im on 2mg clonazepam and 10mg diazepam atm.. back a year ago i was also geting 20mg temazepam ( Yes i often got funny looks from the chemist coming in with 3 benzo scripts from the same doctor)
And i remember one time last year going in too get my normal and saying hey mark can i try out nitrazepam instead of the temazepam inwas reading on a forum some people found it better. And he goes "Sure.. ... nitrazepam..nitrazepam..*starts scrolling on computer*"
Me: Mogadom
Him: Thats it! MOGADOM! Cheers Andy
Haha good times