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Old Flame

T

Terry G.

Greenlighter
Joined
Apr 19, 2017
Messages
21
ok, my first girlfriend found me on FB we were like 15 yrs old and we're in our 50's now. Ive never been able to shake her from my memory. well, we are talking like we're just picking up from where we left off. We are both married, sort of. neither of us have been intimate with our spouses for years now. I really think i still love this girl and i think she is feeling the same way. probably going to meet in a few months and im pretty sure we will be picking up where we left off sexually as well. Im not asking for permission, just comments. pro and con. Thanks T.8(
 
financial issues? thats the big one regarding affairs and potential divorces
 
From friends that have much more wisdom than me, they have told me to follow my heart. So I suggest that you follow your heart and pursue it. Good luck bro.
 
You should probably mention it to your wife and give her some respect.


Fair enough if you have decided to pursue someone else but you should have the common human decency to be honest with the one person who has been by your side .
 
Hi Terry,

I agree with Zephyr above. In addition, IMHO, I think you need to look inside your marriage for what your problems are with your current spouse before you go looking outside of your marriage for a quick fix. Whatever problems you have in your current relationship, you most likely will carry into the next one if you don't figure it out first before seeing the old flame. Also, remember affairs are fantasies and are not really real. You are not in the trenches with your old flame day in and day out like you are with your spouse, So, you don't really know if she would even be compatible with you at this point in your life, other than what you remember about her years ago including your sexual experiences with her. Good luck with this crossroad in your life.
 
SamanthaB said:
Hi Terry,

I agree with Zephyr above. In addition, IMHO, I think you need to look inside your marriage for what your problems are with your current spouse before you go looking outside of your marriage for a quick fix. Whatever problems you have in your current relationship, you most likely will carry into the next one if you don't figure it out first before seeing the old flame. Also, remember affairs are fantasies and are not really real. You are not in the trenches with your old flame day in and day out like you are with your spouse, So, you don't really know if she would even be compatible with you at this point in your life, other than what you remember about her years ago including your sexual experiences with her. Good luck with this crossroad in your life.
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This advice, take it or leave it, is some of the wisest words I've seen in some time. And in my experience worth taking to heart. I do wish you all the best OP!
 
Terry G. said:
ok, my first girlfriend found me on FB we were like 15 yrs old and we're in our 50's now. Ive never been able to shake her from my memory. well, we are talking like we're just picking up from where we left off. We are both married, sort of. neither of us have been intimate with our spouses for years now. I really think i still love this girl and i think she is feeling the same way. probably going to meet in a few months and im pretty sure we will be picking up where we left off sexually as well. Im not asking for permission, just comments. pro and con. Thanks T.8(
Click to expand...


My first girlfriend...turned into the moon.(sorry I couldn't)
Anyway seriously, I don't think you are in love with her, you just miss being young. You were freaking 15 when you had a thing with her and now you are 50...nostalgia is a bitch ain't it.
 
zephyr said:
You should probably mention it to your wife and give her some respect.


Fair enough if you have decided to pursue someone else but you should have the common human decency to be honest with the one person who has been by your side .
Click to expand...

this. discuss it with your wife before anything else. discuss the lack of intimacy and your needs and desires. its possible that you could get 'permission' from your wife, or maybe she'd agree to a 3/4some; this could be exactly what you need to relight the fire of passion in your marriage, or it could come to an amicable end, but if you simply go and cheat on your wife its pretty much guaranteed to go sour.

encourage the other woman to do the same thing, discuss it with her husband first. if you are both truly in love with each other, then your respective partners should know so you can all move on and follow your hearts if necessary, but in all likelihood this is just temporary lust because your physical needs arent being properly fulfilled in your marriages. dont tear up your marriages for some nostalgic passionate fun that might not last; communication and trust are key to making any relationship work, so discuss it and then go from there depending on your partners' responses.
 
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