keeping
Bluelight Crew
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༼ ༎ຶ ෴ ༎ຶ༽ that's so sad to hear mate, im sorry you feel that way about yourself.
sounds like you need some more friends and less drugs
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BDD Moderators: Keif’ Richards | negrogesic
Cocaine and Crystal Meth combo - worth it's while but how safe or not?
- Thread starter Mananas
- Start date
༼ ༎ຶ ෴ ༎ຶ༽ that's so sad to hear mate, im sorry you feel that way about yourself.
sounds like you need some more friends and less drugs
I know you say you don't care for yourself, but those are definite signs that something is wrong. Seek medical attention immediately.
betman
Greenlighter
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- Aug 13, 2017
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I read your whole post and some parts of it rings true to me.
Have you considered long-term solutions to the problems you have now? Sort of like working towards a solid uni degree. It's hard as fuck, but once you're done, life is easy. Almost breezy. A sense of fulfillment that doesn't leave you; there's no dealer that can sell you a bottomless baggie of self-esteem and contentment. That way, you can feel comfortable being a dumpy sober piece of shit all day long and absolutely fly off the handle when you take your occasional drugs.
I like my drugs a lot too, but I know that it exacerbates the issues that I am trying to escape from. I had a fun time being sober until something pulled me back in. Trying not to preach, but PM me if you want someone to talk to about it.
Wow Mananas. I'm sorry to hear that you feel so badly about yourself.
I wish there was something someone could say to help you feel better, but truth be told feeling better about yourself is an inside job.
It is rather discerning that you are feeling potential heart attack/stroke sensations and not seeking help from a doctor! I understand how love of drugs can override common sense. I'm guilty but not quite on your level.
I've decided that if I'm going to kill myself I will make sure I'm going to die. I don't want to be a burden to my family.
I guess at my age (49) I'm courting a stroke myself (plus overweight, smoker, pothead and crack smoker. Plus birth control for hormonal reasons.) No I don't plan to quit (now) but I would seek medical help if I had pain in left shoulder and numbness in left arm. You don't want to just be a debilitated lump that can't do drugs.
I hope you sought help. Would you get back to us and let us know that you are ok? Please.
I wish there was something someone could say to help you feel better, but truth be told feeling better about yourself is an inside job.
It is rather discerning that you are feeling potential heart attack/stroke sensations and not seeking help from a doctor! I understand how love of drugs can override common sense. I'm guilty but not quite on your level.
I've decided that if I'm going to kill myself I will make sure I'm going to die. I don't want to be a burden to my family.
I guess at my age (49) I'm courting a stroke myself (plus overweight, smoker, pothead and crack smoker. Plus birth control for hormonal reasons.) No I don't plan to quit (now) but I would seek medical help if I had pain in left shoulder and numbness in left arm. You don't want to just be a debilitated lump that can't do drugs.
I hope you sought help. Would you get back to us and let us know that you are ok? Please.
Atm I'm for the time being only using Heroin, to see if that helps if I can manage to keep it with that for about two weeks (tho I"m caving Cocaine like crazy after only and since two days - Meth I don't need, that's just a way of having a change in my routine now and then) and for now I don't have much trouble regarding my heart, accept for being immediately exhausted of the most tiny effort (like going up the stairs) f.e. short of breath, fast beating heart - but that's it. But both Cocaine as well as smoking Meth give lung -and heart problems, like damage to tiny vessels, so I guess that could be very likely, tho I rather die from drugs than quit using Cocaine, I could do without Heroin but I would miss it a lot...
But things are a little off with my connection for uncut C and H straight from the importers self from bricks of idk one or more kilo with a big nice stamp on them, stacked up a warehouse full, just in and ready to - after me and some few others having the honor to personally cut a demanded minimum amount from those brick, which is amazing - to get cut and distributed to smaller gangs (a supply for the entire West of Europe), yet like I said something is off I can tell, so I hope not, but should that supply not be here anymore, it would be impossible to find the same thing, and tho street Coke is still very high quality here (about 60%) and also the street H being very decent, I would not use that - to me, since some years by now - low quality stuff, so maybe I will be forced to quit, I would not know how the hell I could get so lucky to have had the luck to by accident having got a unique way in to having my stuff straight from the importers, and H alone is not good enough for me and Meth I don't want to do too much, so, maybe it might be over, maybe already, I don't know, so that would mean getting clean - unless they keep their business going as usual, which I'll know the first week of next month, so I might even have to sober up soon, or not, we'll see...
Or maybe I would be to spineless to be sober and start using Meth more, but definitely not nonstop like with Coke, I don't want to smoke myself retarded... And after only having used five times by now, 7 grams in total, I think I already suffer brain damage, like f.e. memory, that worries me, having a heart attack and die I would not mind, we all die sooner or later, and let's be honest, life without drugs just sucks balls...
But things are a little off with my connection for uncut C and H straight from the importers self from bricks of idk one or more kilo with a big nice stamp on them, stacked up a warehouse full, just in and ready to - after me and some few others having the honor to personally cut a demanded minimum amount from those brick, which is amazing - to get cut and distributed to smaller gangs (a supply for the entire West of Europe), yet like I said something is off I can tell, so I hope not, but should that supply not be here anymore, it would be impossible to find the same thing, and tho street Coke is still very high quality here (about 60%) and also the street H being very decent, I would not use that - to me, since some years by now - low quality stuff, so maybe I will be forced to quit, I would not know how the hell I could get so lucky to have had the luck to by accident having got a unique way in to having my stuff straight from the importers, and H alone is not good enough for me and Meth I don't want to do too much, so, maybe it might be over, maybe already, I don't know, so that would mean getting clean - unless they keep their business going as usual, which I'll know the first week of next month, so I might even have to sober up soon, or not, we'll see...
Or maybe I would be to spineless to be sober and start using Meth more, but definitely not nonstop like with Coke, I don't want to smoke myself retarded... And after only having used five times by now, 7 grams in total, I think I already suffer brain damage, like f.e. memory, that worries me, having a heart attack and die I would not mind, we all die sooner or later, and let's be honest, life without drugs just sucks balls...
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I don't smoke Crack or Freebase often, only once in a blue moon, really very few times... Yet I've done it, because I like to try all possible things that seem like they could be my kind of thing, and for me it was just a bit too much regarding it's effects: too intense, too strong,... But never felt sick or anything, just from once the effects of the Freebase, which seemed to last way longer than when not on Meth, started to fade, I felt the issues with my heart again - Sunday I did one little bump of Coke and I already felt problems with my heart, I do not rule out having had a minor heart attack (which is possible and more people, even people not using drugs, can have one and not know it), but I'm getting it checked out tomorrow, and the next two weeks I would say: hooray for Heroin!
Also I never hallucinated, got paranoid, had delusions or any negative effects from Meth like that besides it's damaging my body most likely, and I fear brain damage a lot because intellect is about the only thing I like about myself, hell I never even had a comedown from Meth, I never use longer than two days and one night and with the help of benzo's, anti-psychotics (for sleep only) and Heroin and Oxynorm get some sleep the second night and feel fine the next day.
I don't use more than one gram at a time, don't compulsive re-dose, keep hydrated and drink lots of freshly squeezed multi-vitamine juice and eating fruit...
I don't use more than one gram at a time, don't compulsive re-dose, keep hydrated and drink lots of freshly squeezed multi-vitamine juice and eating fruit...
I can relate to life sucks balls without drugs. I feel the same sentiment although I only use coke (homemade crack) once per month. That once a month keeps me going. I use to use daily but moved and was able to cut back.
I've found some simple life pleasures (like Let's Make a Deal game show) that help on a day to day basis. It's the simple pleasures of life that makes it worth sticking around.
Now my son has mental illness - tried to kill himself a year ago - and I feel the need to be here for him and support his mental health.
I understand that you aren't close to your family but is there nothing other than drugs that lift your spirits? Even if it's a nicely cooked steak dinner (or the like).
I hope you will invest some time into yourself to improving your outlook on yourself. Maybe its time to learn some self worth. You are worth the time invested.
I've found some simple life pleasures (like Let's Make a Deal game show) that help on a day to day basis. It's the simple pleasures of life that makes it worth sticking around.
Now my son has mental illness - tried to kill himself a year ago - and I feel the need to be here for him and support his mental health.
I understand that you aren't close to your family but is there nothing other than drugs that lift your spirits? Even if it's a nicely cooked steak dinner (or the like).
I hope you will invest some time into yourself to improving your outlook on yourself. Maybe its time to learn some self worth. You are worth the time invested.
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Hey guys, due to varying reasons, I was considering closing this thread. I wanted to leave it open long enough for OP to get the clear picture that this is a dangerous practice. When you're dealing with addictive substances, you walk a very, very fine line in order to maintain anything resembling function or control. I use Opioids every day. I have a career that I enjoy and my life is decent, but all of my free time is devoted to the acquisition and use of Opioids. I have rules though. If I drink Alcohol, I'll fuck up. If I use stimulants, I'll fuck up. It would not take much more than a gentle nudge to send me straight to hell.
The point that I'm trying to arrive at, is that if you want anything resembling a life (the ideal drug use scenario involves using them and also living life, does it not?), doing things like using Cocaine and Methamphetamine in conjunction are going to lead to a pretty quick, severe downward spiral for 99.99% of the population. Besides the acute health effects, just consider what it will do to your life. This is only because I care, not because I judge.
Any closing thoughts of importance before we close this guy to make room for fresh material?
The point that I'm trying to arrive at, is that if you want anything resembling a life (the ideal drug use scenario involves using them and also living life, does it not?), doing things like using Cocaine and Methamphetamine in conjunction are going to lead to a pretty quick, severe downward spiral for 99.99% of the population. Besides the acute health effects, just consider what it will do to your life. This is only because I care, not because I judge.
Any closing thoughts of importance before we close this guy to make room for fresh material?
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