Gay or not?

[Michael2017]

Hello everyone.
My name is Michael and I'm 20 years old.

I don't know what's going on with me lately. I'm not sure about my sexual orientation. I will 100% direct and honest about this right now, so nobody will misunderstand me.

I started masturbating at age 13 I think, watching only lesbian and hetero porn. Throughout my teenage years I tried to experiment on myself, if I liked girls or guys.

I have tried give a blowjob to a guy and receive also from a guy and some others stuff too, but never like sex-sex, if you know where I'm going with this, and also from girls. Didn't like it from guys, so I only stayed with the girls.

I masturbated approx. 2-3 times daily, while looking at porn on my phone or computer, for many years and even when I got a girlfriend for almost a year. A lot of the times I couldn't get an erection when we tried to have sex or something, and it was so embarrasing. So I bought viagra to help me "trying", and it did help when I took it and also sometimes when I didn't take it, but that made me so confused about me. I experinced erectile dysfunction with girls, but never when I was alone with my right hand. I was so afraid that, if my girlfriend wanted to have sex with me or do something somwhere at anytime, I couldn't be able to perform, because I didn't have my pills prepaired.

All of that stuff happened before I hit 20 years old, and since then I haven't been with anyone. Now, I'm looking at girls when I'm out drinking, watching lesbian and hetero-sex. Now I'm constantly thinking if it's because I'm gay - it is eating me up from the inside. Just want to know the answer.

Can anyone provide me with an answer of somekind? Please be serious about this.. It's tough for me to talk about this, even if it's anonymous. If you any questions, feel free to ask them and I'll respond to them 100% honestly and ASAP. ?

 

[CFC]

You don't like sex with guys and don't fantasise about them. So no, you don't sound gay, it just sounds like you're struggling with porn addiction, like a lot of guys nowadays.

You need to detox from masturbation and watching porn for a while. Eventually you'll find it easier to perform IRL, and once that performance anxiety has passed you should be back to 'normal' service.

There's a load of websites out there that you can google to help you with this process.

 

[Michael2017]

Hmmm.. I did some digging on porn addiction and it seems right. Most of the symptoms is very clear, when I take a look at myself - but a solution is not quite easy to find. What I means is that there are so many different ways to do so, but none of them explains how, though.

Thank you for your help CFC. It gave me some peace ?

 

[pofacedhoe]

the solution is easy- stop watching it ffs

sorry but psychological addictions get broken by your willpower alone. one day you say fuck this i've had enough and make an effort then dont look back

an easy way to break porn addiction that will improve sex life is to look at threads with naked pictures but no moving video, that way you have to use imagination to a degree, at the same time cut down to 1 wank every other day.

sex life will become better

 

[CFC]

Yeah mate, no need to overthink - just stop using porn (pretty much forever), and cut back on masturbation for a while. You need to adjust your libido back to a less unrealistic/extreme/fetishised existence.

 

[vancity]

gotta quit the porno mate