Long distance, then we moved in together, then she left, and keeps calling me

[max_]

The title pretty much sums it up except for the part where we're still talking and I really care for her but she is super fucking in love, which i was too but she went back to her city because she missed her parents and i won't be moving away for quite some time (still in college).
Now she calls me every day and it's not that I don't care for her I just want to be alone and get my head straight and even hanging up the phone is hard because she's so clingy (always has been). I'm asking for some advice because I don't want to loose her (although maybe i should accept the truth that it is pretty much over,, but still, i really care for this person).
Also I want to be alone and if she isn't coming back, which she probably won't then I really should move on and try to get my own shit together so in the future i might meet another girl who could make me as happy as this girl has made me in the past.
Any thoughts on this situation?

ps it's really long distance

 

[pofacedhoe]

dunno depends on how much you like her

 

[Foreigner]

Maybe it's because I'm getting older, but who has time for that shit?

Love fools us all into tolerating situations that normally we would write off in 10 seconds.

Is she really worth all this complication and angst?

I'm not in love with anybody right now, so my cold logic is: end it with her. It will hurt. The hurt will pass once your body-mind begins to forget her. Someone else will come along, and you will have a choice over whether or not that someone is better for you.

I'm a big fan of editing one's life.

 

[szuko000]

^ I agree 100% with that, I dont think I could have said it better. I have noticed this, most interactions are beneficial to one party and either negative or neutral to another. That is fine if interactions are neutral, mutually beneficial, or are understood to be a +1 -1 interaction based on prospect of future exchanges. So it sounds like when you communicate with her you are put in a -1 position and she benefits, the real question is why bother if you know its not going to amount to anything.

In this life we really only have time and skill. I strongly advise you consider each time you give some of that away for free, its not unlimited and people take advantage whether they mean to or not. You can find someone else where the exchange is more mutually beneficial and your life will improve because of it.

Perhaps I'm jaded from a certain amount of mistrust i have with people or how often in the past i got used for resources, most of the time understood by me... i just wanted to make people happy, but all that ever did was drain me. You can do what you wish but I would strongly suggest working on you, that is really all you are left with at some point.

 

[SamanthaB]

Hi Max, I think you said it all when you indicated to us that you just wanted to be alone, think this through and get yourself together. I would just tell your "girlfriend?" that. You say you are a long way away from each other and that really isn't conducive to a very high quality relationship. In addition, she also sounds like she is a little clingy and needy. You might want to think whether you really would like to be with that kind of a woman in an ongoing relationship. That can kind of be a red flag for any relationship. If you get this all thought through and you have good reasons for wanting to be with her rather than another woman closer to you that might be better suited to you, then hopefully, you will know better why you are going that route. At this time, I do not think you do. Let us know how things go.