before i got to my parents i was in the first stage of psychosis- voices/paranoia, really don't ever want to need a legit script for it.... white will do that to you mate. I have been on gear for 35 years on and off and with white i only ever get a stone when i score gear. The addiction to rock is only in the head yer not gonna be sick . Go to work and dont score at midnight even scoring some b would better but then you are gonna be offered both so thats a no no . Really the N,A thing of a day at a time is the only thing they spout that makes sense to me. You can leave it for a day ffs then the next day see if you can do it again even break it down to 1/2 days i promise the pull of the pipe will lessen - been there with speedballs took 18months and ruined veins to stop. Now i can take it or leave it - is it even that good? down here -london its pretty mediocre so it makes me even less inclined to pick up i oly get a stone out of habit and after one you never get much of a buzz anyway.
YOu can do it if you want to - make the right choice. I rarely post on here but i know how yer feeling and also know that its possible to quit - day at a time mate.GL
thanks. i know you're right. and i've got nearly 3 weeks with only a few shots through the post (many many disappeared when previously it'd been reliable, probably for the best). so i can leave it, but i've had basically no money and no contacts at my parents. once i'm back with money and contacts, the cravings will be strong. i feel like if i can of the payday/first day back at work, it'll be like climbing a mountain, and i'll feel more able to do the next day and the next.
i'm glad you made it out the other side, gives me hope!!
i may get some b at midnight, it does help with the w cravings. and if i can't get a literal babysitter (i'm trying) my plan is to just knock myself out.
and weirdly in Norwich it is now as good and similar in price to Leeds (and i got good contacts in Leeds)- it was shite for ages then a local boy started selling decent so the London lines had to buck up or fuck off.
CHINUP! WOW! How are ya? Caught up a little in your previous posts. Hope things are on the up.
You just made Sham smile by your mere presence. ( me too)
Hello!! gla di made Sham smile, hope i did for you too.
I'm better than i was 3 weeks ago. i arrived at my parents and slept for 3 days. first night mum was watching me cos i was so deeply asleep she was worried i'd stop breathing. i've done me rattle, had some decent time off the light, taken full stock of the destruction of my life, attended a lot of NA (though i don't think i'm down with abstinence only), enjoyed myself for my first time this year.... and its clear i'm still suffering post viral fatigue so i got that to contend with too when i get back. hard work is just about to start.
