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How long to wait to fart in front of a new BF/GF?

T

twang

Bluelighter
Joined
May 12, 2012
Messages
105
So I'm wondering how long you all personally wait to fart in front of a new partner? Is it a case by case thing based on their personality and how you think they will react? Or do you just let it rip the very first time you feel the need to fart when you're hanging out?

I asked a co-worker how long it was until he farted with his girlfriend who he'd been with a couple years. He told me they NEVER farted in front of each other. He would either go outside or go to the opposite end of the apartment/house depending who's place they were at. He also told me whenever she would have to take a shit, she would leave and drive to the nearest convenience store cause she was too embarrassed/ashamed to do it when they were hanging out together, Whether they were at her house or his apartment. Pretty fuckin crazy

I asked another friend and he said he farted in front of his girlfriend the first time they hung out.

The last girl I was in a relationship with for about 4 years would fart in front of me more than I did in front of her.

Also, how long did you wait until you shit at a new partner's place?
Has anyone farted in front of their new partner and had them act totally disgusted and repulsed by it? Or did they just laugh and start doing it in front of you after that?
 
Every person and therefore couple is going to be different. It all comes down to personal preference, and what you're into. Personally, I like extremely girly, clean, sweet, cute and not to mention MATURE women, so hearing/smelling them fart is a stab in the wrong direction, as would be burping, peeing/shitting with the door open, or doing anything in the potentially "gross" or "immature" category. If I wanted to date a dude, I would and we could sit there and see who could stink the other out of the room first. Now, don't get me wrong, I'm not a nazi about it or anything, but my wife and I have a simple understanding that neither of us has any desire to witness the other doing gross things. I show the same courtesy and try not to fart in front of her, but it definitely happens from time to time and she'll joke about it. Same if she slips one out, we'll joke, but it's understood that neither of us enjoys being around that, so we simply refrain.

At the same time, I've known couples that are the polar opposite, and think people like us are crazy and stuck up. Different strokes, that's all.
 
Farts slip out at the worst times and it is the ultimate test of your relationship. If you slip one out hopefully it will be a loud funny fart and not a silent deadly.

If she laughs it off or joins in then you have met your future wife. If she berates you for a fart at the beginning then don't waste your time.
 
Twang - After reading about your coworker who had to leave the house to do #2, that's actually kind of sad. I mean if they have sex and all, isn't his member about an inch or so from where it comes out of her? How in the world could she not be OK with being behind a closed door and taking care of business? I'm sorry but something about that screams "issues"! And for the record, I'm all for not being too vulgar (that may be too strong a word) when it comes to stuff like that. Oh well, to each his own.
 
BeachBum4u said:
Twang - After reading about your coworker who had to leave the house to do #2, that's actually kind of sad. I mean if they have sex and all, isn't his member about an inch or so from where it comes out of her? How in the world could she not be OK with being behind a closed door and taking care of business? I'm sorry but something about that screams "issues"! And for the record, I'm all for not being too vulgar (that may be too strong a word) when it comes to stuff like that. Oh well, to each his own.
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I totally agree, crazy. They're not together anymore as of a couple months ago. But he said she was raised catholic in a well off family and his theory was pooping was a shameful thing in her household. She never told him he that she was leaving to take a shit, he just realized after awhile she never shit while they were together but would take strangely timed trips to the QuikTrip down the street. It wasn't so much that he had a problem with it, she was just embarrassed and therefore because she never farted in front of him, he never did it in front of her.

I'm In a new relationship now, like a month in, and I already burp in the middle of makeout sessions (I turn my head of course, and she's done the same to me), pee with the door open, and whatever else the first responder listed, but I've yet to fart in front of her. That's a much bigger step to me than burping in front of her or peeing with the door open so she could walk by and see/hear it. She's gonna be sucking that same dick within 5 minutes of me peeing sometimes so I think we're on the same page of having to burp or pee not being gross or immature.
 
think about how uncomfortable trapped gas feels then apply that to your partner.

you want them to feel like that? if not then you have to accept the humanity of their farts

its about accepting each other and the others flaws both as a human and individual.

no-one is perfect

Penf0ld said:
If she laughs it off or joins in then you have met your future wife. If she berates you for a fart at the beginning then don't waste your time.
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words of wisdom

if being told off begins with your bodily functions imagine what happens when you do something bad through active choice as all humans do at some point? jesus
 
An ex farted too much and it was a major turn off! Sorry, I don't want to smell you all the time. Makes my vagina dry up. I understand people get gas sometimes, just don't make it a habit to fart all the damn time in front of the other person. Gross.

"Oh yeah baby, you just let out a big, smelly fart. Let's fuck!" No. I don't think so.
 
Holding either is uncomfortable. I wouldn't want to be with someone who couldn't laugh or accept what we are, which is essentially a long feeding tube with various appendages and a bit of hair at one or both ends. It's a balance.. I wouldn't want open fart warfare all the time, but sometimes it's funny. Like spooning in bed and then she let's one off on you, and you then proceed to dutch oven her with her own gas for being disrespectful haha.

As for shitting. Have you seen the state of public toilets? Can you even find one? Fuck that. If I'm at hers and I need to shit, I'm going to go take a shit on a nice pristine convenience with a full armory of bog roll. Don't care if it's the first time I'm there, or she's at mine and she needs to pinch one off.

Neither is so much an issue if you eat a largely healthy diet. Won't smell like roses, but it's miles better than someone who eats pizza and takeaways all the time. I speak as someone who dated a girl with an atrocious diet. She had no embarrassment about it but probably should have!
 
Courtesy flush at least. I wouldn't want the person I'm with smelling my poo. They have those sprays that take poo odor away.

Yes, I know poo and farts are human, but too much of it takes the romance away. For me anyway.
 
3 is the magic number, Start small and get them accustomised to the greater. Pace your meals and orchestrate your gas, within the parameters of this. It's a skill.
 
Asclepius said:
3 is the magic number, Start small and get them accustomised to the greater. Pace your meals and orchestrate your gas, within the parameters of this. It's a skill.
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3 is the magic number for what? Start small with what?
I'm going to try to make it a point to fart in front of this new girl I'm dating next time we hang out assuming they're not terrible smelling that day. At this point I wanna just get that first fart out of the way to take the pressure off, no pun intended.
 
your farts stink if you eat lots of sugar in my experience, cutting out meat really improves the smell

but seriously sugar is the worst thing for making me fart excessive horrible smelling ones (booze also). think fruit juice

also garlic makes very strong smelling farts but the sugar is the worst


farts arn't so noticable/offensive if u eat veg cut and down on booze fags and sugar
 
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I never fart while being with a girl, and if she farts more than once while being with me(never happened)-she gets friendzoned, since she obviously doesn't even try to attract me.
And not realy friendzoned, since I've never seen a girl making a good friend, but you know-stop seing her as any kind of romantic-sex partner.
About friends (guys) though, if we haven't farted while being with eachother, we are not realy friends yet.
 
Please don't make a point at farting in front of her on purpose. It will happen naturally and, as Penf0ld said... If she laughs it off, you're on a winner!!

I've been with my husband for 14 years, and while we try not to fart, when it happens, we laugh it off.

Once he farted in bed, so he started singing "sexy, everything about me is so sexy...". I was in tears of laughter ???

Just chill out. Try not to if you can... but if it happens it happens. I actually find burping a lot more gross....
 
I've hung out with her plenty since my last post and somehow haven't had to let one go in all that time. Guess that's the universes way of telling me not to do it on purpose. Luckily she doesn't find burping gross because I do that all the time. We'll be in the middle of making out and I'll stop and turn my head and burp 6 inches from her face (blowing the burp away from it though, of course) and when she has to burp she took a cue from me I guess and does the exact same thing. Then we just continue making out like nothing happened. I guess if she's cool with that she's likely to be cool about having to fart? Although farts certainly gross me out more than a burp. Farts have a way higher potential of smelling bad. Burps only smell bad right after you eat and even then, most the time they just smell like whatever food you just ate. Some foods do smell worse than others though when they're burped up. Same with farts though I suppose.
 
If she's cool with you burping, I'm pretty sure she'll be cool with you farting. You found a good one ;)
 
I started dating this girl in college and was trying to be proper and all and hadn't farted around her. One night we had been out drinking a few beers and it was going to be the first night we slept together. So we finish some awesome sex and are laying there and I have to fart soooo badly and it is taking all my concentration not to. About this time, she reaches over and tickles me and I lose control and let out this gnarly beer fart. She starts laughing, so I start laughing. And then the smell hits us and we both go running out of the bedroom (fortunately is was summer and my roommate was gone). We stood out in the living room naked and laughed for a good 10 minutes.

She was also the first girl to catch me masturbating. Cool girl, but kind of crazy.
 
While me and the lady were drinking at the bar I work at, I was talking to the bartender working at the time and somehow our convo allowed for me to bring up, without making it look like I was fishing, that our coworker and his gf never farted in front of each other and she would drive to the gas station to take shits when They were together. And my lady chimed in and agreed that was crazy as fuck and said she understands not farting in front of someone for awhile to maintain a degree of attraction but after awhile you gotta do what you gotta do. Sounds like I got nothing to worry about
 
Idk....I do remember my wedding night. We dank so much that night. Talk about hung over...I farted a nasty vapor fart and she puked.....that's about all I remember....
 
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