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July Getting/Staying Clean/Sober Thread vs. "Fireworks and Toss your Works"

Erikmen said:
If the cravings are really tough live one hour at a time, then postpone it for few hours until you can live one day at a time. I believe that cravings alone don't last that much, so if you can avoid it for the moment you'll see it's going to pass. It's part of the process, you can do this! :)
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Well said. One hour at a time got me through a lot of my days in early recovery. I still go back to that mode from time to time.
 
Greetings and Happy Belated 4th of July!

I have been struggling with multiple addictions for a number of years and although I'm not 100% there yet, this is the best that I have been in a long, long time.

I have been blessed to live right by the shoreline. As a matter of fact, I literally have less than a five-minute walk to the beach. In spite of this, I thought about it today and honestly could not remember the last time that I had been there. Why? Either I was home drinking/using or if did go to the beach, I certainly don't remember being there in the past few years. I know, it's sad. I feel bad for even typing this because I know that there are probably city-bound readers who want to slap me right now!

Well, today I was 99% sober (I am currently on a very strict taper to avoid having a seizure or other withdrawal-related episode) and the weather was beautiful, so I decided to go for a walk. I had honestly forgotten just how beautiful it is out there! Now, let me stress that I am not wealthy whatsoever, nor do I live in the best neighborhood. Nevertheless, the scenery was/is absolutely breathtaking. I only planned on a short walk, but ended up spending over an hour just wandering around and taking in the sights as though I was seeing them for the first time. (In a way, I sort of was.) I plan on going down there every chance I get from now on.

It doesn't have to be the beach though; It could be a park, the museum or your favorite room of the house. The point is, I will never forget this day. I savored every moment and felt higher than I have on any drug in quite a long time. I wish that everybody could feel like I did today. When I finish typing this, I am going to make a list of places that I want to visit in the near future. For that matter, it isn't just places; There is music that I want to write. There are old friends that I want to see. There is so much that I want to do right now, I wish that it were earlier in the day. I cannot remember the last time that I have felt this excited about life.

Have a great night (or day if you are on the other side of the globe), and I will keep you all in my thoughts and prayers...

Peace, Love and Faith,
Dreamflyer 8o
 
Quitting drugs is somehow like quitting smoking. Your senses become more real as in not smoking you'll experience different tastes you had forgotten you had. You'll start to feel good about food, and recognize bitter and sweet like life is. The whole world seems to be so real and shocking sometimes. Even when it comes with sadness, regrets, etc you start to feel things and feeling alive is good. You know what you are looking at, so to speak.

It's like waking up to a new and scary world of surprises where you know you can learn how to guide yourself even though it might take sometime. And all the true love that comes back, the real senses rather than an illusion. Sometimes it's a short experience but once you have hope and guts/willpower you get the sense you know what you want. And it becomes a goal you really want to achieve. That's how it was for me. It took so many years of short breaks until I've experience a long one. It's hard to think of that in a long term. But I'm enjoying it while it lasts, hopefully forever.
 
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Erikmen said:
Quitting drugs is somehow like quitting smoking. Your senses become more real as in not smoking you'll experience different tastes you had forgotten you had. You'll start to feel good about food, and recognize bitter and sweet like life is. The whole world seems to be so real and shocking sometimes. Even when it comes with sadness, regrets, etc you start to feel things and feeling alive is good. You know what you are looking at, so to speak.

It's like waking up to a new and scary world of surprises where you know you can learn how to guide yourself even though it might take sometime. And all the true love that comes back, the real senses rather than an illusion. Sometimes it's a short experience but once you have hope and guts/willpower you get the sense you know what you want. And it becomes a goal you want to achieve.

It's hard to think of that in a long term. But I'm enjoying it while it lasts, hopefully forever.
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I was talking to a guy at work yesterday...he had cancer a couple years ago, and apparently the chemo destroyed his senses of taste and smell. But just recently, the tastes and smells returned. He was ecstatic. His experience reminded me very much of the gradual process of feeling the world after addiction.
 
Absolutely. It's a double-edged sword; The same thing (learning to feel again) that makes it so scary for a lot of us to get clean & sober can also be one of the most awesome things about the whole experience. I am just beginning to really appreciate this new feeling, and I have been in and out of recovery for more years than I care to admit.

I was recently reading "It's So Easy", the autobiography of Duff McKagan (the bass player from Guns & Roses/Velvet Revolver for all of you "young folk" out there, LOL). He said that the first time he went grocery shopping sober, he was so overwhelmed by the sights and sounds that it felt like a bad acid trip or something. Around the same time though, he began to experience a whole new flood of emotions that was better than anything he had felt in decades! He said that the smell of newsprint brought back very vivid but enjoyable memories of delivering papers as a kid. He began to ride his bicycle again (because he was still to shaky to drive a car), which he credits as the main thing that kept him sober during those early days.

I just had this "revelation" as I was typing the paragraph above, and I am thrilled to have somebody to share it with...
People always talk about having the proper set and setting (mindset + physical surroundings) during a psychedelic experience. This also applies to sobriety, especially newfound sobriety. Every sensation is heightened such a great deal that our environment plays a huge part in how we are going feel at any given moment.

Have a great day, and I will try to do the same!

Peace, Love and Faith,
Dreamflyer 8o
 
Awesome post, dreamflyer. Set and setting for the clear-eyed--getting things squared away to increase our chances of a positive experience. I like it.
 
I'm going to have a challenging day tomorrow but I'm looking forward to the challenge. I hope you all are doing well. <3
 
Keep your head up CH! I had great afternoon yesterday. I think I may have met the first person who has actually inspired me to genuinely consider not using any drugs whatsoever. One day perhaps, one day. Pretty cool though :)
 
^ those steroids can be a nightmare <3

Cleared 30 days today off everything and almost 60 off booze and cigs.
 
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