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BPH shiz

Buspersons Holiday

Bluelighter
Joined
Sep 18, 2016
Messages
2,101
Scents

The smell of Patchouli spells abuse to me

Mint
Fresh new start, renews me

Lavender
Faithful, familial, calming scent & sense and presence

Bergamot
How could I not wake up to you each day before I even catch my breath?

I can't wait to see which sense and smell will spell out to me today​
 
Prompted only by dead mice littering the place & a recent plethora of friends who were tidier

I don't like dead beings -
Dead animals, extinct people,
You SCARE me
Your still, stiff (or soft) bodies
Unhinge me

Madness, aggression, uncontrolled emotion,
You're all fine, familiar, can deal with that quite comfortably,
Calm you, de-escalate, hold tight (if I have to)
But,
Do NOT do dead on me, as I do NOT do that
 
Scents

The smell of Patchouli spells abuse to me

Mint
Fresh new start, renews me

Lavender
Faithful, familial, calming scent & sense and presence

Bergamot
How could I not wake up to you each day before I even catch my breath?

I can't wait to see which sense and smell will spell out to me today​

this i can really get into, i can smell the emotion
 
Crutches

Yesterday,
I gestured at the man behind me in the corner shop queue
to go in front of me
He was walking on crutches & had already put two large bottles of beer on the counter, unable to carry them and crutch at the same time without a bag
Declining my offer with a self-deprecating remark, I continued my purchase whilst replying to him that 'I know what it's like as I was on crutches for a year'

Tonight,
Sitting outside, smoking secret cigarettes after ten years fervent abstinence, I realise that I have no idea what 'it's like' for the man in the shop
I also realise, cigarette between fingers & glass of wine beside
That I have been using crutches for a long long time
 
Eucalyptus
Opens a door with a violent, biting wind that startles and suddenly wakes the strength and beauty stifled before.
 
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Den

A functional fuck-wit whose veneer is capable & organised & together
Only telling the story beneath to those closest, & always only after and sometimes never

The funny tales of lunacy, of pop-up tents & yearning for a den to hide in & indulge the obsession with no chance of observation from window cleaners, drones, scaffolders or binoculars across the street

In a home so beautifully designed to give light & airy space in such a small area, but there is not a single corner that has no window or mirror or vantage from the outside
Even frosted windows and doors around every corner offer no protection

I decide I need a four-poster bed, even though I'm really not the type
Rearranged bedroom again in a frenzy, attempting the elusive den, deliberately avoided at the last rearrangement, thinking fuck you, I'll do it so it looks good, I refuse to arrange my furniture to facilitate my addiction

It was so open & wide & it looked beautiful but offered no protection

I regretted not pandering to my need for secret corners when I moved the furniture

The wood of the antique dressing table & inherited chest of drawers, pristine through all these years, is splitting with my careless re-arranging & pushing loaded full

I moved it all around again tonight, it still is open & wide and I have no den to hide in
 
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