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So I didnt feel well and I rolled anyway

I

Inds

Bluelighter
Joined
Feb 11, 2017
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606
About 10 hours ago I got too impatient because we had a cold day here in june so I wanted to take the opportunity as I probably won't be rolling at all in the summer. I was in a shitty mood and I had this lingering stomach virus or whatever the fuck this is that made me shit liquid the past week, so I wasn't well mentally or physically. I also stopped taking my buspirone pills for a few days to see if they negatively affect a roll.

The effects caught me by surprise because they kicked in way earlier than usual and I wasn't done setting up my playlist and lights. I had about 10 freakouts that I barely got under control. Every time I got a spike in pleasure, I crashed with a panic attack and I worked hard to think happy thoughts as much as possible to reverse the downward spiral. The lovey songs in the playlist also helped to calm me down. I did take vitamin B complex 3 hours after taking the pill as someone suggested but I have no idea if it did anything. I only took 110mg of ecstasy so I didn't experience eye wiggles and the gurning was minimal. I didn't dare to look at myself in the mirror, lmao.

The comedown which I'm no doubt experiencing right now is not so bad. I'm not depressed or anything but I'll be sad if I don't have an afterglow tomorrow. I deserve it, god damn it! :(
I didn't preload with 5-htp but I'll take some tomorrow.
 
So what's the story? You learnt, I hope, not to roll when you feel bad?
 
Correct. Just documenting my experience and welcoming comments from experts if they notice anything unusual. I've been told that health of your intestines is linked to mood because many serotonin receptors are there or something. I'm also wondering since mdma redirects the blood away from the surface of the body and into the main organs, does this just inflame the bowels even more?
 
They say that two thirds of the body's serotonin is stored in the intestines.
Perhaps our ancestors intuited this, because we have numerous expressions that link our guts to mood and feelings.
 
So it's probable that my stomach ache and gut cramps (which I knew I wouldn't be able to relieve when I'm high on e) were the cause of my downfall this time? Is the fact that it kicked in much earlier a sign how weak my immune system was?
Like, holy shit, I know what it feels like to be bipolar now. I've been having frequent upswings and crashes that roll. A burst of happiness and then a downward spiral of panic and negative thoughts which I tried hard to reverse with happy thoughts with limited success. Fuck me, I just can't get a grip on myself. This is why I'm looking for an empathogen that's not a stimulant and 2C-B might just be it.
I'm also wondering if Buspirone is perhaps helping my rolls by mitigating my anxiety?
You guys think I could avoid the panic attacks if I had a pet to cuddle with?
 
Buspirone acts as an agonist of the serotonin 5-HT1A receptor with high affinity (Ki = 20 nM).[3][36] It is a preferential full agonist of presynaptic 5-HT1A receptors, which are inhibitory autoreceptors, and is a partial agonist of postsynaptic 5-HT1A receptors.[3] In accordance, an animal study found that buspirone dose-dependently decreases serotonin levels, while increasing dopamine and norepinephrine levels.[3] It is thought that the main effects of buspirone are mediated via its interaction with the 5-HT1A receptor.[3] Some of its effects may be mediated via oxytocin release secondary to 5-HT1A receptor agonism.[37][38][non-primary source needed] Buspirone additionally possesses weak affinity for the serotonin 5-HT2A and 5-HT2C receptors (Ki = 1,300 nM and 1,100 nM; ~60-fold less than for 5-HT1A), although this probably isn't clinically significant.[3][36]

In addition to the 5-HT1A receptor, buspirone is a weak antagonist of the dopamine D2 receptor (Ki = 240 nM), with approximately 15-fold lower affinity for this receptor relative to the 5-HT1A receptor.[3][36] It preferentially blocks inhibitory presynaptic D2 autoreceptors, and antagonizes postsynaptic D2 receptors only at higher doses.[3] In accordance, buspirone has been found to increase dopaminergic neurotransmission in the nigrostriatal pathway at low doses, whereas at higher doses, postsynaptic D2 receptors are blocked and antidopaminergic effects such as hypoactivity and reduced stereotypy, though notably not catalepsy, are observed in animals.[3] Buspirone has also been found to bind with high affinity to the D3 and D4 receptors (Ki = 98 nM and 29 nM, respectively).[39]
Click to expand...

This is buspirones pharmacology. While a few days is enough to have it our of your system, it may not be enough to reset your brain. The drug significantly effects dopamine, norepinephrine and serotonin. The most alarming thing I get out of the above is that the drug increases norepinehprine, something I definitely want to minimize with all drugs as it causes a shitty panicky feeling aspect in most stimulants I believe.

The drug is also directly binds to serotonin receptors, which may very likely result in downregulation of serotonin receptors which will reduce your ability to feel the calming effects of mdma.
 
Thanks LucidSDreamr for this useful information. Having access to info is one thing but being able to interpret it like you did is another. I want to get off buspirone but I fear the bad stomach virus I got was a symptom of withdrawal effects. Should I try going cold turkey? I'm only on 10mg per day at the moment. I was supposed to be on 20mg originally but that outright made me sick so I voluntarily went back to 10mg and have been for 2 months now.
 
havnt you been told on here before you shouldn't do mdma while on buspirone?

why don't you find another drug to do when you feel like just getting high on a whim? mdma is a special occaison sort of thing....i know you are antisocial but just save it for when you feel well all around and are not on meds.

get some amphetamine if stims are you thing....dissociatives are hedonistic like mdma but much more forgiving physically and mentally.
 
Yes, but I didn't think it was an issue because I rolled successfully in april after having been on buspirone for a month. Stims arent my thing, empathogens are. MDMA is just the most common available empathogen I can find but I am looking into 2C-B.
I will never take speed, I took it once and it didn't end well.
 
2cb is a good option and way easier on the mind and body than mdma. Not really sure about how it would react with buspirone but you're in somewhat uncharted waters and they are not often entered by many for a reason. Do a thourough google search on mdma + buspirone

Just because you get away with doing something once doesn't mean it won't hurt you the next time. thats a very easy but dangerous mindset to have with drug use. I've been guilty of it myself. I have plenty of friends that shot heroin thousands of times and didn't die...then guess what happened to them one day when they shot heroin for the thousandth time? they died.
 
I am getting off buspirone slowly. I don't want to be on this crap anyway, it's more expensive than the mdma and all it does is make me irritable. mdma did more for me than buspar, it completely killed my nack to think negative thoughts or view online gore for a whole week back in april. This is desirable.

I did do a google search for the combination and I found very few sources. One guy said he didn't notice a difference and the other thinks it enhanced his experience. It didn't sound like a fatal combo. I understand what you mean about complacency. My ex threatened suicide a thousand times, so many times that I got used to it and learned to ignore it. Then one day she did it for real. :(

You guys give useful advice and I listen to everything that's been told to me. The way you told me "didn't we tell you not to mix it with buspirone?" made it sound like I'm not listening but that's not true. I appreciate all the advice and have been taking it. I went off buspirone for a whole week before rolling and now that you told me it's not enough I'll be getting off it completely before trying again.
 
A week is pretty good to be off it. It's not like you're on an maoi which is a proven fatal combo. it's just a drug who's pharmacology doesn't suggest it would be a good idea to combine. And like u said there is very little data or experiences so we don't know.
 
Pharmacology is so confusing, ha. Like, ecstasy drains your serotonin completely yet you get an afterglow. If it increases norepinephrine I'm tempted to wonder how it produces a calming effect but I guess the positives of the other chemicals outweigh the negatives of the others. Buspirone increased the negatives of too much norepinephrine and decreased the positives of the serotonin release I guess.
 
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