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Would you date someone with a child?

It depends if the father was still in the picture. If he is, he could be jealous over your time with her or with the kid(s) and would interfere with your relationship. So if he is in the picture you need to see how things go. If he gets involved with your relationship, end it because it will never work out. I had experience with that once. He did everything to make me look bad and interrupted our plans constantly. The relationship ended badly.

I did hook up with a girl once (she looked really young) and I did not realize she had a daughter till the morning. After spending a pretty hot night with her, I woke in the morning, naked in bed with her. I have not even opened my eyes and I feel her fooling around with my penis, so I thought we were going to have some morning sex, and I got hard pretty fast, then I realize it's not her, it's a little girl, about 9 or 10, who has pulled back the blankets to uncover my nakedness and playing with me. I brushed her hands away and woke her "mom" up and she admitted he has a daughter. I told her she could have told me and it would have been fine, but she was playing with my penis while I slept and that was wrong. She told me that she forgot to lock the bedroom door last night and that her daughter was just being curious and that she was OK if her daughter learned about men and sex from us. I was freaked out and I dressed and left. I never went out with her again. I don't want to get in trouble with the law.
 
noonoo said:
Met a girl last Saturday night and we exchanged numbers, she told me a few days later she has a kid. I was ok with this but now am seeing that because of the child our relationship won't include much alone time or going out. I'm a bit of a needy lover when in love and I guess this is my downfall. She's been off and on with communicating but it's me who has been initiating more. I feel like this won't work out so took her off Facebook, Snapchat but still kept her number. She hasn't even texted enquiring why she was taken off nor has she messaged much since Thursday night.

Am I too assume she ain't interested and I should just move on?

On another note who here has dated someone with a child and how did it work out?
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I used to be with a woman who had a child, sex was as good.
 
From the other side, I was the woman with the child when I met my now husband. He was a baby when we met and raised him as his own. We married and went on to have 4 more planned children.

It takes a special/certain kind of person and if its not you then please do the mum/dad and child a favour and stay away. Parents have so much more to worry about than just themselves :)
 
drwho883004 said:
I did hook up with a girl once (she looked really young) and I did not realize she had a daughter till the morning. After spending a pretty hot night with her, I woke in the morning, naked in bed with her. I have not even opened my eyes and I feel her fooling around with my penis, so I thought we were going to have some morning sex, and I got hard pretty fast, then I realize it's not her, it's a little girl, about 9 or 10, who has pulled back the blankets to uncover my nakedness and playing with me. I brushed her hands away and woke her "mom" up and she admitted he has a daughter. I told her she could have told me and it would have been fine, but she was playing with my penis while I slept and that was wrong. She told me that she forgot to lock the bedroom door last night and that her daughter was just being curious and that she was OK if her daughter learned about men and sex from us. I was freaked out and I dressed and left. I never went out with her again. I don't want to get in trouble with the law.
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Wtf? She didn't mind if her 9 yr old daughter played with your penis and learned about sex from both of you? I'm just disgusted. Her daughter needs to be taken away from her. Seriously.
 
sargam said:
you can have all her attention once you tell her openly that you need her love.
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Not sure I agree with this, she won't be able to give you all her attention because she should be giving her kids her main attention. Also telling her you need her love might easily make her feel like you're too needy considering she has kids.

My good friend started dating a girl with kids. He's in a band and he met her at a show of theirs in a town they are popular in about 6 hours away. They play there like twice a month, so he'd see her periodically, always when she had a babysitter. Eventually he'd start staying at her place while he was in town, so he got to spend a little isolated time with them.

Well, she decided to move to the town we live in, I think primarily to be close to him as it's been a while now. Suddenly he's seeing how it really is for her day in and day out. The kids don't have a father in the picture (he's in jail and no longer a part of their lives because he's basically a bad dude), and they are really looking for a father figure, I can attest to that because I have babysat them a couple of times and they look at me like that too. They're really looking for a men to look up to. My friend is a poor, frequently traveling musician who is 7 years younger than her, in his mid-twenties, they began their relationship as an open relationship but now she really wants it to be exclusive, I can tell. My friend has realized that (in his words) he's too immature to be a father figure and be what she needs, he can barely make rent. So he's feeling like it's probably doomed but he loves her and wants it to work out so he's kinda just delaying the inevitable. It bums me out because she's great (so is he, he just isn't ready for this sort of thing), and the kids are awesome, and I think it's going to end painfully for her (probably not as much them).

The moral of the story is, if you're going to get involved with someone with kids (man or woman), be prepared for what that really is. If you know you can't handle being someone who can be a good fit with someone with kids, whose life is centered around them, and their lives are centered around hers/his, you should pass on it because it won't work and people will get hurt.
 
Maybe you people exagenarate it a little. When I was 19, I used to be with a 10 years older woman and she did have a child. But it was not that hard to find a balance between taking care of her little boy and having sex with me.
 
Well it's not just about sex, if you're trying to be in a relationship, she's eventually going to want you to be a big part of her family's life. So looking ahead a little, it's worth considering. If you're just trying to casually date someone with a child it's not the same thing, and much easier to work out fine as long as she's not wanting more and you're not leading her on.
 
If you are a needy lover best to date someone without kids. I was a newly single and youngish mom and went back on the market years ago and dabbled in a few "relationships" to find out that the guys I was dating were not ready for kids in their lives which is totally fine just be upfront with it. I only ever introduced my son once to another man and that is my current hubs. Women with children-if they are good moms would not put their kids in any situation where they are keeping kids from you or introducing them right off the bat *red flag* in my opinion anyway. My hubs was previously divorced and had kids too and we clicked and he was also 12 yrs older. The greatest love of my life but I do belive had I stayed in the same situation with younger men without children I would not have found another person on the same level. Not saying men without children can't do the same I just never met one :) good luck
 
I became pregnant at 17, things with the dad didn't work out. He ended up in prison for 15 years. I met my now hubby when my daughter was 2. He adopted and raised her. 8 years later we had daughter together. He never treated the kids any different. I was a little worried about that. Fast forward 15 years.. We separated a few times, i spent some time away in detox then rehab. In that difficult time, he took care of both kids, offered all the love and support they needed in my absence. I know that their relationship is one that will last forever, they share a bond that can not be broken..
In this instance..You could potentially lose out on life changing opportunities.
 
Depends on the age and maturity of the child. Someone with a mature teenager who can easily relate to adults, yes. Someone with small children, no. I don't have children of my own and at this point in my 40s, learning how to relate to children is not on my to-do list. Someone with tweens or immature teenagers, no. Don't need to be dealing with any kid hostility after they find out mommy and the boyfriend are doing what mommy and daddy used to do.
 
Nope. She tried to move in right away and I was not having any of that. Too bad shes hot though but I don't want a crack baby in my house.
 
chompy said:
Nope. She tried to move in right away and I was not having any of that. Too bad shes hot though but I don't want a crack baby in my house.
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Crack baby? Damn homie! That's cold. Haha

Kids are like kryptonite to me. They mostly get on my nerves. Keep 'em far away.
 
Hell no I don't need another man's bastard spawn in my life, shoulda kept your legs closed.
 
I don?t know I?m in my 30?s so not many people my age don?t have kids . Def would not want to get with someone who had a very young baby or drama still with the other parent .
 
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