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Thread: How to better my living

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    How to better my living 
    #1
    Bluelighter jayjaysleepyhead's Avatar
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    Hi folks, im new to this website ,but I crave a drug free better life, I just cant get motivated at daytime, like between 8am and 4pm im in bed still trying to sleep,its so stupid but if I dont get at least 4 hrs I will not rise, am also from uk and caught in the so called benefit trap. Like the goverment pays 196.00 per week for my studio flat so id need to earn that then all my bills on top then fares to and from work,food council tax etc etc, get the drift, I was a day to day heroin user and went to jail many times for theft, so that before I knew it from age of 28 to well now. My life has just disintegrated into a very depressed,unconfident, lonley human being living in london with nothing,just about getting buy, ive overdosed 4 times ,twice Intentionally (recently) and twice some years ago when I used to inject, I still dabble once a fortnight to relieve this pathetic life Ive created. Im on 24ml of liq methadone daily and 10 mg of diazepam which is a long term thing, I see my phsych, prescriber, etc on monday its our first meeting, but I know whats coming ( ur doing well sir)
    Yes well u try live my life,ive had it I cant get away from it, I so crave a family and a normal life (cleshay). I just need advice,help, u name it I need it. Any ideas would be welcome, p.s sorry for my moaning.
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    #2
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    Drug Culture

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    Would it be possible to do volunteer work or something else unpaid that would at least get you out of the house?

    Theoretically you could also work off-the-books somewhere, again, more as a way to get up and about than the money.

    I didn't see anything about food but I assume you get food stamps or something similar? Buying more produce/bulk type items and cooking for yourself is another great way to feel better and more empowered, while also giving yourself something to do.
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    #3
    Bluelighter jayjaysleepyhead's Avatar
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    Thanx , I do cook one meal a day, thats all I can afford, id love to get back to work but as you have read its noy that simple over here, a. I also have an anti social problem, been alone too long, made a big mistake leaving scotland to come to london and stay with my father as we now barely talk , its my fault as he has tried everything, but I was in my own little planet, vouluntary work does not fulfill me at all, I understand u totally but im in a bad place at the mo. Thanx anyway
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    #4
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    Consider that it may not be just 1 step to personal satisfaction. It may be an incremental process, but anything you can do will be positive progress.

    I've been depressed and anxious for a long time, and I just have to take small steps to stay on the right path, especially when I get in a bad rut. Just getting out of the house is important.
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    #5
    Bluelighter jayjaysleepyhead's Avatar
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    And even though yesterday and today are londons hottest days of year I still wanna stay in as not a big fan of sun or anything remotely good for me, its weird man its like I prefer it to be windy,cold, and raining and everybody to be moaning about life like me is that just my depression.
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    #6
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    Performance Enhancing Drugs
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    Leave London - you'll be permanently stuck in a benefit trap given the housing costs. Move up North. London is also a very alienating place, and people are in general friendlier outside the city.

    What things do you like doing?
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    #7
    Bluelighter protovack's Avatar
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    Is there something preventing you from contacting your Dad, asking for help?
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    #8
    Bluelighter jayjaysleepyhead's Avatar
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    yes, he has been through too much with me and has no trust now in a nutshell
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    #9
    Bluelighter watermelon14's Avatar
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    Start going out, doing things with friends. If you don't have friends, try to talk to some new people and make friends, preferably people who aren't into drugs. Find things to distract yourself so you're not constantly thinking about what you don't have.
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    #10
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    First of all try to find a job and set a routine, I'm talking about basic stuff like going to bed and waking up at the same time, having breakfast in the morning, meditating when you wake up and before going to bed (this will help you a lot in the long term), going to the gym on specific days or even just dedicating a specific time of the day to reading/listening to interesting podcasts etc.
    Also find a hobby you think you can dedicate at least 30 minutes/1 hour a day to and start eating a healthy diet.

    I think these things especially having a job and a routine are the most basic and important to get right before even thinking of leading a healthy and meaningful life.
    Then when you feel like you have solid foundations for being a decent human being you can start thinking about quitting drugs, because without these 2 things you will likely relapse because of boredom/lack of meaning and order in your life etc.

    You need to build a meaningful life so that you don't think about getting high all the time and spend your time doing things you feel are useful.

    Move to another city where you have no connections to buy drugs if necessary.
    Getting high? Remember: safety first!
    Read the BLUA before posting! - Feel free to PM me anytime if you need help!
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