Long term heroin & methadone recovery

[motiv311]

No I was clean for 6 weeks and then I relapsed because I had to move, get a new job, and buy a new car.... I coudn't cope with all the things I had to get done sober.... But I have already purchased 10 suboxone strips in anticipation of having to taper again. I need to get back into some AA rooms to help with the psychological issues I have

 

[elvis_wears_nikes]

Well done for managing to get off of the juice that's an amazing feat! I have been stable on my dose of methadone for nearly three years and have managed to not use illicit opiates for around two. To be honest I am not looking forward to coming off of methadone and it's a long way down from 100ml! I am terrified but it good to see some positive and relatively non-traumatic stories among the horror stories... I know it not going to be easy.

Realistically, I'm estimating that getting completely opiate free for me will take about two years if I reduce gradually in 5ml increments every two weeks then jump over to buprenorphine when I get to around 30ml following a short period of withdrawal. That seems to be the popular route in the UK at the moment and supposedly slightly more comfortable than jumping off methadone but that is to be debated.

I'm worried that I might aggravate my mental health if I reduce my dose any quicker than that as I have been battling depression and PTSD. I feel like the less chemically dependent I become, and subsequently less numb, the more I am going to have to work through some difficult issues and memories. I have recently experienced the horror of benzodiazepine withdrawal which, that alone, did a great deal of damage to my mental health in the long-term but I did manage to get off of them eventually and the awful constant lingering anxiety did eventually pass.

I am definitely not the only person who has been struggling with both addiction and mental health problems. I wonder what experiences other people have had with their mental health when discontinuing substances such as opiates or benzodiazepines?

I want to get a bit further away from my benzo nightmare first before attempting methadone withdrawal as I'm worried I will go running for benzo's if SHTF! But well-done again for getting so far - keep your experience posted!

 

[Somerandomdude]

A life long heroin addict I knew came off methadone, against his doctor's advice, and was dead of an overdose within 18 months. he actually had an overdose right after getting off methadone but was revived. Next time wasn't so lucky. Be careful guys.

 

[motiv311]

Wow you're gonna take 2 years to taper from methadone? that is playing it way to safe in my opinion.... I tapered from 70 mg to 30 mg in 3 weeks, and then from 30 mg i jumped to 8 mg suboxone, and tapered 8 days to nothing...... And that was pretty painless, only some insomnia

 

[elvis_wears_nikes]

Wow you're gonna take 2 years to taper from methadone? that is playing it way to safe in my opinion.... I tapered from 70 mg to 30 mg in 3 weeks, and then from 30 mg i jumped to 8 mg suboxone, and tapered 8 days to nothing...... And that was pretty painless, only some insomnia

You are braver than I am! Like I mentioned I have been struggling with my mental health especially since coming off of benzos. I haven't yet dealt with a lot of issues that have emerged since I have been in recovery from active addiction. I think attempting to do a quick detox might aggravate things but then again it will also lengthen the process so that is a disadvantage. I'm not ready to start reducing my dose and to be honest the thought terrorises me at the moment. I'm disappointed in myself for getting to such a high dose but I guess it did make me stop using heroin.

 

[elvis_wears_nikes]

Edit: I miscalculated and make the timeline closer to 12 months with a 5mg reduction from 100ml every two weeks then switch to buprenorphine at 30mg methadone to 8mg then 2mg reduction every two weeks and jump to zero from 0.4mg. That is the plan for when I am ready but given that methadone is a liquid I guess it makes slightly it easier to titrate according to how I'm feeling and could potentially go faster or slower depending on my mental health and severity of withdrawal symptoms. I am greatful that MMT is free where I am as it would have been definitely been a struggle... I have never met a rich heroin addict! But unfortunately mental health services are stretched beyond their capacity but that is also a similar feature in many courtries today.

 

[Death&moan]

Well it is great to read that you fellow travellers are trying-bravo-pat yourself on the back-why not?? ^^^good on you all-yeah!!![insert clapping hands here-xxxxx] you aint going to win if you dont even try-and turtle wins the race dont forget too-

i get the relapse thing-been there-too many times-


as for the mental health thing-no shame in getting help-ive had sessions with psyche quaks here and there-just to dump my shit-

i know im more then fine in the head im a righteous naturally kind human being and i know it-so do the psyches-i dont really need to go but i have because its no use shit dumping on those you love, nor expecting them to really understand either-how could they?

have to get real honest with yourself and learn to know yourself and identify your patterns of behaviour-actions and reactions-

fearless self analysis is the only way to recover,

I never stop reminding myself how good life is-even when its a bit crap-like at the moment with body pain.

because there are some people out there who are dead or wheel chair bound or all cancered up and really suffering worse then we could imagine in this world-

healthy to remind yourself of this....

not to take away from anyones hard time-dont get me wrong, when your in the middle of it-it seems like theres no way out-ive been there-lowest of the low-

felt like kissing life good bye- but thats very ungrateful and i couldnt do it to my family nor friends-ever.

its a cants act unless your going to kark it anyways maybe....but even then........

theres somehting very spiritually wrong with topping yourself, i wont pass over that way, no matter the pain,

and boy-ive made pain my friend before in life hahahaha-

its a good world full of great people-

keep us updated as i like to read your stories i relate-

and tell a bit of mine too if you dont mind.

anything is possible, and remember-

thomas the tank engine doesnt get up the hill by saying to himself-"i think i can't"

you will get there-if you really want too-

dont be the 97% that doesnt-be the 3% that does-go on-

i dare you - i am.

i beat the monster monkey- so can u /

nothings more powerful then your own spirit-nothing

 

[Lilyeye]

Edit: I miscalculated and make the timeline closer to 12 months with a 5mg reduction from 100ml every two weeks then switch to buprenorphine at 30mg methadone to 8mg then 2mg reduction every two weeks and jump to zero from 0.4mg. That is the plan for when I am ready but given that methadone is a liquid I guess it makes slightly it easier to titrate according to how I'm feeling and could potentially go faster or slower depending on my mental health and severity of withdrawal symptoms. I am greatful that MMT is free where I am as it would have been definitely been a struggle... I have never met a rich heroin addict! But unfortunately mental health services are stretched beyond their capacity but that is also a similar feature in many courtries today.

Elvis play it as safe as you need. The safety net of Done is really necessary I find especially if you re in a city / situation where you can go out and score. There's nothing worse than Done withdrawals and when you can go score easily you know its easy to fuck up. Seriously each to their own... some people are on very high doses and once they stop using they can easily knock a large amount off the dose and not make too much of an impact. Some people are shorter term users who then stop and get on the Done straight away and they can do a short term reduction, others struggle with being on Done and using at the same time for years, or with mental health conditions as well and obviously in those cases its a lot harder.

Seriously 2 years is not too long! Youve gotta spend a lot of time adjusting to a new life, mental health problems, etc. I took it slow for a while, then fast, then slow again depending on how I was feeling... I'm not trying to diss anyone but if you can come off a massive habit and then Done within a matter of weeks youve got a much less addictive brain and better pain tolerance than me and hats off to you, but I've been an addict for a long, long time and it takes as long as it takes mate - hang in there and go as slow as you need! I think it depends on how long youve been on the Done too... I mean, leaching into your system long term theres no way you could get over that instantly... Play it as safe as you need!! And if you fuck it all up, try try try again cos you'll get there one day mate!