Congrats on the two month break from Oxy. I'm having a really tough time trying to quit, I've perhaps made 10 attempts at quitting opiates in the past couple years. I made it a few months and I found the post-acute withdrawal symptoms to be horrific. Worst panic attacks of my life, and benzos wouldn't touch them. Not even like 20mg alprazolam it was insane! I normally take 2mg clonazepam daily and that's when I threw in the towel so to speak. As I felt the benzos were frying me at that level and not helping at all, but I couldn't stop, I needed to somehow escape. This was months past acute wd so I'm definitely concerned that my mental health has significantly worsened from all this abuse.
It's really discouraging because it's tough enough to get through the first 2 weeks. I know that opiate withdrawal is a rollercoaster ride where some symptoms come and go and it can go on for a long time depending on your use. For myself one day I felt recovered, the next I'd be sick, but the symptoms would vary. It was totally nonlinear. I have crying spells all the time when I'm tapering opiates let alone going without. Over practically nothing, it's just my brain doing its thing.
I haven't used Gabapentin before so this is good to know. I have used baclofen as a comfort med for around a month and it resulted in strange gastrointestinal symptoms and discomfort in a certain spot of my gastrointenstinal tract, as well as a marked feeling of well, feeling slightly psychotic or dissociated. Just mild withdrawal, really, but again I would use it up to 100mg a day for the muscle aches. So I really wouldn't want to have kept that up as I had rebound spasticity in my neck / weird neck twitches after a while.
I think it's a drug related to the gaba system as well? I really try to watch it with the comfort meds these days if I'm really trying hard to quit, but of course that can be tough. Maybe I should check out gabapentin. I doubt you are as fond of gabapentin so much as oxycodone, so a slow taper should do you well! I think dabbing hash is best really. Lots and lots and lots of it, grams upon grams of oil, since there are little to no repercussions from that. I had success doing that for some time. Since I can dab a half ounce in a week and there's no withdrawal, nothing but the effects of the drug. Spending acute withdrawal dab after dab, lol. Gives you something to do too, just try not to burn myself lol when I'm tossing and turning flipping and flopping. And I had 99.9% pure THC-A at one point which helped so much and was wonderful to dab. I believe that started in cali but it's a thing in Vancouver now too. Lovely stuff. I see this is kind of turning into a rant as well. Sorry again, I just really need to vent tonight. I've put so much effort into quitting in the past and here I am with several grams of dope to sniff, hydromorphone I'm thinking of shooting, and other opiates to hold me over just in case god forbid I ever come close to running out.
Gotta get my shit together. Opiates give me energy and vitality, I am not one to nod even off high(ish) doses of heroin. In fact, drugs like heroin and oxy help me focus and concentrate, as well as socialize. The last thing I want to do is sit on the couch or sit around when I'm high. It's when I'm most active, I mean my use is my own and I often use alone but I hear a lot of people nod and that's a common effect but I'm a highly functional opiate addict. I've never slouched over or anything like that. Just not a highly functional sober person. Heroin or morphine can give me those waking dreams in the later stage of the high if I do enough, but again, I'm typically even functional then and able to hide it and have it not impact my performance. Weed on the other hand... I have people bitching me out for smoking a joint within a week of picking up the habit again. I find that ignorant, and it's why I'm not presently dabbing when it has really helped me cognitively with the desire to quit using in the past. Haven't dabbed since September and I'm craving some nice live resin! Expensive stuff though for a junkie especially if you like to dab all-out.
So I am going to jam some metalcore as that is therapy right there. Just ranting tonight but I'm not feeling so well and I need to take my mind off the pain.
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