So much happened on that night...the crazy started before midnight on the new year. I woke up from a nap, pondering the concept of polycarbonate dreams. Visions and sounds of celebrating with bubbly drinks and fireworks, lovers embracing lovers, cliche stuff, but it was thick in the air that night. Every hour I felt another time zone in the collective conscious erupt in celebration, and this became more intense after midnight on my end as my redose of 3meo took my trip to the beyond. At one point I had a battle with my shadow and ended up with a busted lip...some hard realizations/downloads I was given by what I concluded was my higher power, that there was only one path and I need to get with the program, lest I continue to lose my battles with my shadow. By 4 or 5 AM the psychosis was becoming ever-more hard to manage. I had not been sleeping enough the previous week because of the suboxone withdrawal. My psyche was wide open to anything, and my body was somewhat weak which did not help the color of the experience. I started hearing things, like a constant 'wee-ooo wee-ooo' that made me think there was some sort of extradimensional spacecraft orbiting me, maybe keeping me safe, maybe waiting to harvest my soul if I ended up dying. LOL, like I said, my psyche went every which way, often simultaneously. When I turned on music, that helped greatly- I highly recommend some laid back grooves if you are having a hard trip, it really helps to pace it and distract the mind from looking too deeply inwards. As the sun rose and I was greeted by a new year things looked up for a few hours, until I came down from the residual high of feeling reborn and began to experience a very harsh physical detoxification process that hit very quickly and intensely. A week of drug use and not enough sleep or food, and the peak of sub withdrawal all at once, combined with trying to resolve some of the darker parts of the trip became just too much. For instance, in visions I gleaned some of the my many possible futures, including one leading to my death. On a positive note, I saw on my horizon that I would be moving back to Tucson AZ in the spring- as long as I survived- and sure enough the plans solidified just 2 days ago to leave at the end of this month. Cheers