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August Getting/Staying Clean/Sober Thread v. Full Moons and Nights

So apparently I have 2 years, 3 months and 18 days clean.

I am sorry I disappeared on everyone. My life got very busy and I have many stories to tell. Ended up getting another girlfriend and went through another breakup/off and on off and on period on top of it all again (a younger latina from the Southside of Chicago man what a rollercoaster :p) as well. Haha, life lessons life lessons. Women/sex really have become an issue for me and when I was using I didn't really care. I have to really be conscious of it nowadays, to the point where I am forcing myself to stay out of a relationship for awhile.

Its amazing what pops up for us during sobriety, so many highs and so many lows. What I can say is that getting clean was the best decision I have ever made and my worst day clean is better then my best day high. Also, my family relationships have been restored and it is such a joy to watch my niece and nephews grow. Hopefully some day I have a child of my own because I know I can be a great dad.

I am going to try to become more involved again. I am starting an internship at a chemical dependency unit and am so close to finally being done with grad school (there have been some major hangups but its all resolved). I have been through the steps twice, once in NA and once in AA (which is my primary fellowship now that I am in Chicago).
 
phactor said:
So apparently I have 2 years, 3 months and 18 days clean.

I am sorry I disappeared on everyone. My life got very busy and I have many stories to tell. Ended up getting another girlfriend and went through another breakup/off and on off and on period on top of it all again (a younger latina from the Southside of Chicago man what a rollercoaster :p) as well. Haha, life lessons life lessons. Women/sex really have become an issue for me and when I was using I didn't really care. I have to really be conscious of it nowadays, to the point where I am forcing myself to stay out of a relationship for awhile.

Its amazing what pops up for us during sobriety, so many highs and so many lows. What I can say is that getting clean was the best decision I have ever made and my worst day clean is better then my best day high. Also, my family relationships have been restored and it is such a joy to watch my niece and nephews grow. Hopefully some day I have a child of my own because I know I can be a great dad.

I am going to try to become more involved again. I am starting an internship at a chemical dependency unit and am so close to finally being done with grad school (there have been some major hangups but its all resolved). I have been through the steps twice, once in NA and once in AA (which is my primary fellowship now that I am in Chicago).
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welcome back :)
 
mrsnowygrainius said:
As of today It has been exactly a week since my last cigarette!! I can't even believe I made it this long...

what happened was I got a bad cold last week and as any body knows smoking ciggs when you have a cold is horrible, so I took this opportunity to try and smoke less but i ended up just not even smoking at all! Not even one cigarette! In a week!!

I really am proud of myself, put I must admit I didn't quit cold turkey I actualy have been using dip :(, not the heavy long cut stuff, but the little pouches... I use like 2- 3 punches a day, it helps the cravings to smoke and its why I didn't get any nicotine withdrawal

yes chewing tobacco is still very bad but its not as bad as smoking, I can notice a difference in my lungs already! feels amazing!! I have surfing motivating me to keep going so I can hold my breath longer when Im held down, but idk the cravings are getting bad I really wanna smoke!!!

on aanother note, its been a little over a month since I smoked any crack, and like 3 weeks since I shot any dope. I am on suboxone maintenance and take my medication as prescribed. I don't shoot it or abuse it. I am ok where Im at in my recovery, even tho Im not technically sober...


guns keep pushing tho see how long I can last wish me luck
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congrats on being cigarette free!!! :)
 
I'm still going strong here. I completely forgot about this until now but this year I celebrate 4 years sober from alcohol which was my main addiction/problem drug.
 
I've been having a hard time lately. I won't bore anyone with the details, as they're not particularly interesting.

Today featured the unpleasant bit of news that kratom will soon be banned on the federal level, however...kratom was one of the most effective anxiolytics I'd ever taken, and I had used it in the past as an alternative to the benzodiazepines I'm prescribed, quite successfully in fact. In contrast to the sedating, mind and emotion numbing effects of benzodiazepines, kratom gave me energy and contentment...I'm very saddened by the news that it'll no longer be available here in the United States. It would appear that the moneyed interests of the pharmaceutical industry and their lackeys in the DEA have struck again 8)
 
^ well I haven't actually had any since late July, but as for why I want it? It's an enjoyable substance which is light on the mind & body, reduces my anxiety, and adults should be free to make their own choices...I think those are all good enough reasons.
 
When I see how things are tough when it comes to drugs I had always wondered about how Kratom was allowed and not weed for instance.
I mean, if Kratom is okay so should be MJ in all states from my perspective. I think the future points to less and less severe actions regarding marijuana.

Even Uruguay in South America legalized weeds. The have yearly fairs to sell the production and people are making a lot of money while the dealers had gone away looking for something else to do..
 
Burnt Offerings said:
^ well I haven't actually had any since late July, but as for why I want it? It's an enjoyable substance which is light on the mind & body, reduces my anxiety, and adults should be free to make their own choices...I think those are all good enough reasons.
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Gotcha. There's always other things you can do to help ease anxiety. :)

I personally didn't hear it was being scheduled. It is a shame if you ask me because the government is still trying to go in the wrong direction, despite all the progress we've made with medical marijuana.
 
Sweetyjane77 said:
Some people do need them to live comfortably. You may not need them but there are millions that do and don't abuse them. We're not weak or feeding an addiction or not putting the work in and wait years to see if we need them or not. There's no shame in taking a medication that treats a condition. To tell him to ride it out a few more months and see is not good advice when your not a doctor. Someone could feel shame or failure if I wanted to take a med that gave me a better quality of life and was told to ride it out.
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Please don't put words in my mouth - you make many assumptions which are by no means representational of my feelings with benzos or medications in general. I happen to speak with Manboychef in real life and know that he is not too keen on starting them back up. I also know that some of his symptoms are because he has recently stopped benzos because he doesn't want to stay on them. If you noticed in the very first sentence, I stated for him to do what is best for him. Not once have I advised anybody to go against thier doctor's advice, or change their medication without discussing with with their doctors first. More often than not, I recommend people discuss their health issues with their doctors instead of just seeking advice online. Also, I never once villainized benzos - I shared my person experience to another person who does not really want to get back on benzos. If other people's experiences that differ from yours offends you, you may not want to spend as much time on recovery forums as many people have had difficulties with benzos, and other medications.

I think you are taking what I said personally and it has nothing to do with you, and everything to do specifically with Manboychef and his situation. You mention shame and weakness, it seems you may have some personal feelings to work through on your end regarding your medication use as I don't judge people taking drugs or medication, nor do I ever apply those terms to people taking drugs and medication so none of that came from me. As a matter of fact, I do my best not to judge people in general as that is not very helpful as I don't know their sum of experiences to assess why they are they way they are. I certainly don't think somebody is weak if they need medication, and quite frankly I think addicts are some of the strongest people on the planet to be able to endure such difficult times that addiction and mental health issues bring on, and recovery isn't for the faint of heart either.

In the future if you are confused by or upset with something I have written I would appreciate you come to me in a pm instead of calling me out multiple times in a public forum, particularly when what you are inferring is so far away from the scope of what I stated. It seems hostile, and this is supposed to be a supportive recovery forum. You want people to be sensitive to your feelings and needs, you have to extend that courtesy to others.

ETA: just saw this but it's closed so I can't respond there, and will address it here since this is the thread you are referencing. Seriously, my post upset you this much?

http://www.bluelight.org/vb/threads/802043-Why-is-one-drug-demonized-by-a-mod-but-other-drugs-not

I will say if you have a response to this post you can message me. There is no need to derail this thread any further, I only posted a response here so my others don't misinterpret my words as you continued to twist and manipulate them.
 
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Captain.Heroin said:
Gotcha. There's always other things you can do to help ease anxiety. :)
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If those "other things" are CBT and mindfulness, believe me, I've been around Bluelight's Sober Living subforum long enough to know about 'em... ;)
 
Burnt Offerings said:
I've been having a hard time lately. I won't bore anyone with the details, as they're not particularly interesting.

Today featured the unpleasant bit of news that kratom will soon be banned on the federal level, however...kratom was one of the most effective anxiolytics I'd ever taken, and I had used it in the past as an alternative to the benzodiazepines I'm prescribed, quite successfully in fact. In contrast to the sedating, mind and emotion numbing effects of benzodiazepines, kratom gave me energy and contentment...I'm very saddened by the news that it'll no longer be available here in the United States. It would appear that the moneyed interests of the pharmaceutical industry and their lackeys in the DEA have struck again 8)
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Sorry to hear things aren't going well for you right now - I sincerely hope they get better. Yes, that is bad news indeed about kratom. I hope they reconsider as that really is going to hurt many people as medicinally it's a very versitile plant. I think you're right, big pharma probably had a hand in this. I hope you start feeling better, we are here if you need us.
 
September Getting/Staying Clean/Sober Thread v. Newspaper Carriers and Tardiness

Three days without benzos.
 
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