Hey dude
please do not listen to these people who say that you are doomed to stick a needle in your arm. they are projecting a certain weakness they succumbed to onto you. I get the feeling that like me, you are the type of person who could never and would never under any circumstance stick a needle in your arm just to get high. maybe the needle high is better / more intense or whatever, but the high of snorting and smoking is dammnnnnnn good, as you've so stated. i'm not judging people who spike it. to each his own. I just don't like people who say to others that, "hey dude, you might think you're in control now but you're gonna be sticking a needle in your arm before you know it"...
it's simply not true. if you as a person can inflict self harm on that level, if you're capable of it, and you have the opportunity, then yes, chances are good you will do it. but i get the sense that you are not that kind of person, so stick to your guns, stay true to yourself and never forget that NO HIGH, no matter how intense, is so much better that you should stick a needle in your arm, which will undoubtedly lead to so much more bodily harm than insufflation or smoking could ever come close to. I believe that no matter how much dope you do, there's no way in hell you'll ever stick a needle in your arm... and if you do, remember that decision right there, will be by FAR AND AWAY, the worse decision you ever make in your life. Because that decision, will lead to decisions later that you can't fix and you can't take back.
As to your question, I know where you are. I know exactly the stage you are at. You don't want to quit, because you like doing dope. you like everything about it. You aren't in THAT much trouble. There's no clear and present danger that's going to ruin your life. If say tom, you got stopped by the police and got a drug charge, you'd probably quit and never touch it again, amirite? or if you did, you'd be careful to the point of being paranoid.
Here's my humble advice to you... and it comes in 2 points:
1. stop doing dope now, just stop. sure it's great, it's fun, it's fucking awesome. but at one level or another in the future, you're going to experience MUCH pain. whether it's w/d, whether it's your loved ones finding out, whether it's getting caught by the police with a gram of dope and getting a shitty judge who wants to make an example, whether it's nearly OD'ing and dying with the ambulance ride and all that, whether it's running out money and losing friends, SOMETHING BAD is coming down the road that will cause you a great deal of pain - it's a guarantee. So, if you just stop now, think about how fun it was and chalk it up as a great experience, you'll be much better off.
that said, it doesn't sound like you're there at that point, at all... so here's option #2
2. don't chase the dope high. sure, it's great, it's awesome, it's fucking amazing. but once you start chasing, that's when you start going down that path. Look at dope as a simple pleasure. A period of time during the day that you get to feel better than you normally do. The chasing i was talking about starts when you start to want to feel like that ALL THE TIME. but the fact is, you can never feel like that all the time and you'll ruin your damn life (via point 1). So look at dope as sort of a meditation period. A period during the day, for a few hours, you feel like a million bucks. then let it come down, smoke a joint or something and go about your business, knowing that the next day, you have this simple pleasure of life to look forward to.
Now at a certain point, you will begin to notice that it takes more dope to achieve the same feeling. This is the fork in the road where most people take the wrong way. One fork, you start doing MORE and you get to the same place as before and you're happy. But of course, now you've just upped your habit and before you know it you're sucking D for dope. But there is another way... take the other fork in the road:
The other fork in the road is where you, instead of doing more, you do less, or even none at all. Even for someone at a gram a day tolerance, a couple good lines will give you that meditative, euphoric state you search and you may have w/d symptoms if you stop completely but the trick is, to do just enough, not to be sick. I say that to point out that, obv if you do this you're not doing a gram a day, maybe .2 gram a day somthing like that. so to take enough just not to be sick is basically nothing.
I'm talking like a line that's 4 cm long, just enough. And you do that for a month, instead of doing more. So instead of doing more, you do less, for about a month. So during this month, you're not getting high every day, but you're not sick either.
THEN, after a month, you can go back to doing the same amount you were doing before to get the same effect as your tolerance will have dropped back down. Remember, ONCE a day, enjoy the buzz and look forward to the next day.
If you can do this, you can successfully do heroin without it taking over your life. IF YOU CANNOT DO THIS... THEN STOP NOW! because you're only heading for varying levels of terrible pain for yourself in the future.
Also last thing, if you have the will and self respect to do #2, take other harm reduction measures as well. Eat well, exercise, vitamins, don't drink alcohol or do other drugs like benzos (weed is fine, smoke weed all you want). Generally, try to live as healthy as possible.
So that's it... srry for the novel. Remember though, don't ever even begin to dream about sticking a needle in your arm. not once, not ever.
