Hi all, i'm new here, really just out of desperation at the moment cause it seems really hard to find out.
I don't want to go too deep but 3 weeks ago I had a serious mental break from taking 1g approx mxe and coke. I went insane, through eternal hell in my head whilst my body seizured around the room screaming and smashing things (friends were present, i had zero recollecton).
Basically reality broke and it took me since then i keep drifting into the most HORRIFYING disassociated states and psychosis where i realise the world isnt real, etc, i cant even type too much about tje feeling, talking about it is making me extremely uncomfortable now. This then follows by an extreme anxiety attack which basically doesnt stop until I have taken some benzos prescribed by a dr.
I am living in a constant state of fear of falling back into this state, fear of triggers of this eg. Music, films etc. Anything can seem menacing or other worldly.
Some days I feel fine, mornings I am generally fine, but thoughts spiral as the day goes on and these world shattering disassociated states and anxiety attacks where my feet prickle and legs go numb, heart rate increases, start shaking etc, they are still randomly occuring 3 weeks after.
I saw a psychiatrist and she was helpful, the benzos helped, but coming off them i get the same problems. They signed me off because my symptoms had improved so much but now its re occuring.
Advice please if anyone has has similar extreme disaccoative trips that they cannot fully escape from after so long. Terrified its never gonna change.
Really please some positive advice and realistic opinions of whether anti psychs or anti depressants might be in order? I've improved hugely from a week ago and I guess maybe a step forward and a step back for the past week, really just want my old self back though.
I've been acting normal and going to work most days, generally i seem like i'm keeping it together, but in my head i'm a real mess. For the record I haven't and wouldn't fuck with drugs again!!!
To clairify, my main problem is im having trouble truly coming back to reality, have a strong sense of reality not existing, just wanna come back down to our reality. The feeling is so strong sometimes i think my mind is going to snap.
Sorry for the long read, am rambling thoughts, but I know the people on here can be experienced and supportive, and hopefully once I recover I plan to offer the same help and advice to people cause its an extremely lonely place.
Peace peeps
I don't want to go too deep but 3 weeks ago I had a serious mental break from taking 1g approx mxe and coke. I went insane, through eternal hell in my head whilst my body seizured around the room screaming and smashing things (friends were present, i had zero recollecton).
Basically reality broke and it took me since then i keep drifting into the most HORRIFYING disassociated states and psychosis where i realise the world isnt real, etc, i cant even type too much about tje feeling, talking about it is making me extremely uncomfortable now. This then follows by an extreme anxiety attack which basically doesnt stop until I have taken some benzos prescribed by a dr.
I am living in a constant state of fear of falling back into this state, fear of triggers of this eg. Music, films etc. Anything can seem menacing or other worldly.
Some days I feel fine, mornings I am generally fine, but thoughts spiral as the day goes on and these world shattering disassociated states and anxiety attacks where my feet prickle and legs go numb, heart rate increases, start shaking etc, they are still randomly occuring 3 weeks after.
I saw a psychiatrist and she was helpful, the benzos helped, but coming off them i get the same problems. They signed me off because my symptoms had improved so much but now its re occuring.
Advice please if anyone has has similar extreme disaccoative trips that they cannot fully escape from after so long. Terrified its never gonna change.
Really please some positive advice and realistic opinions of whether anti psychs or anti depressants might be in order? I've improved hugely from a week ago and I guess maybe a step forward and a step back for the past week, really just want my old self back though.
I've been acting normal and going to work most days, generally i seem like i'm keeping it together, but in my head i'm a real mess. For the record I haven't and wouldn't fuck with drugs again!!!
To clairify, my main problem is im having trouble truly coming back to reality, have a strong sense of reality not existing, just wanna come back down to our reality. The feeling is so strong sometimes i think my mind is going to snap.
Sorry for the long read, am rambling thoughts, but I know the people on here can be experienced and supportive, and hopefully once I recover I plan to offer the same help and advice to people cause its an extremely lonely place.
Peace peeps
Last edited: